Quitting is hard hard hard

[Kandy77]

Hello all, my name is Kandy not Jimmy...... I was not thinking that my username would be a blog name lol So please call me Kandy.

So my quit day was August 29th. But wait no praise just yet..... I have slipped several times... So I am so disappointed in myself and want to know would you change your quit date and if so why? If it was only like 4 cigarettes total since my quit date? I am noticing also that it is very hard for me to get settled. It's almost like I alll of a sudden have ADHD and please no offense to anyone because my 8yo daughter has ADHD. My fiance and family are trying to help support me but I feel like they do not truly know how nor understand like y'all do. I am very glad to be on this site and have seen very helpful things. I just really need some more encouagement or I will fail at one more thing in my life. Sorry to ramble guys I am just really feeling down today yet hyper and wide awake at 9 pm after being up since 5am CDT btw. I appreciate your support and please give me some thoughts on the quit date question.

[Giulia]

Welcome to our family, Kandy.  Yes, quitting is hard hard hard.  But it gets easier easier easist as time goes by.  My opinion only, since asked, yes, reset your quit date:  /blogs/Giulia-blog/2015/04/09/it-s-not-the-puff-it-s-the-permission   If you read that blog, you'll see at the bottom there are four other links to discussions on the subject.  It's been discussed much on here with many differing opinions.  You get to choose what's right for you as you know and understand yourself a whole lot better than we can.

Yes, we disappoint ourselves when we fail.  But we can conquer most failures by perseverance.  Mistakes are one thing.  Failures another.  There's that thing within us that I call the "Best of you" that knows what we're supposed to do for what's best FOR us.  It knows and understands the truth.  And it knows an excuse when it sees one.  Dynamically so when it comes to addiction.  It especially knows when we're lying to ourselves.  Listen to that part of yourself and you can't go wrong.  It will never let you down.  And it will never let you alone until you achieve what it wants for you.  

And yes, I think we all go into a type of ADHD when we quit.  Fortunately it passes with time.  Sit back, breathe, read some more, digest, learn and start anew.  Each cigarette you take, even if  it's only 4 in X number of days - each one is re-awakening the nicotine receptors in your brain.  If you haven't read the material on nicotine receptors, you can find lots of info about it by typing "nicotine receptors" in the search bar.  But here's Dr. Hurt's video on it:  Nicotine and Your Brain - YouTube 

Hope some of these thoughts and material help.  People who have never smoked don't really understand what we go through.  They can encourage us, but it's the ones who have been there, done that - that really "get" where we're at and how incredibly difficult it is.  Just keep aiming for that Best of you.  

[Kandy77]

Giulia Thank you so much for all the helpful hints and the encouraging words. I really appreciate it.

[Cousin-Itt]

Hello Kandy and Welcome

  Try to understand how long you smoked and to quit without a battle will never happen.  But in a very short amount of time I can tell you that you will be feeling not only physically better but happier.  It is so much worth it 

Just take it one Step at a Time, One Day at a Time.   I'm sure you can do this. 

  Should you change you quit date Is a decision you need to make from your heart.  Will it benefit you if you keep the same date? Will it make it easier to keep your quit?  Or will it help you the most by changing it. Nothing really makes a difference except quitting and staying quit   Just my opinion

 Remember  The only time a person actually fails is when they stop trying.  We all have the strength inside us to do this

Carl 1,500  DOF   

[Jen_819]

Hi Kandy! Welcome to the group. My original quit day was August 25th and I started again over the weekend. I had a "slip" during the week and that led to just being a smoker again. I am so disappointed in myself, but need to just get back on the quit train! Let's do this!!! We can't give into that monster. Today is Day one again for me and I am going to make this a Day WON!!!

[DavesTime]

Kandy77 Jen_819 Kandy and Jen, you can do this! None of the rest of us here who have quit are special.  We have all been trapped in the frustrating cycle of wanting to quit, but feeling as if it was a nearly insurmountable aspiration.  BUT...it is very doable.  Keep on coming here, read the resources, posts, and experiences of others, and share your journey.  You are worth it!

Dave

734 Days of Freedom

[YoungAtHeart]

It's up to you whether to change your quit date.  My thought, though, is that if you don't, you aren't holding yourself accountable and maybe making it easier to do it over and over.  At lot of times one cigarette can lead to others, sending you back in time to being a full-time smoker.

What can you do differently when you quit THIS final time?  Did you do the prep work before?  The recommended reading?  Made lists of what you can do instead of smoke when the cravings get difficult?  Changed up your routines to reduce the associations and triggers?  Gotten in supplies of healthy munchies for when they hit?

If you didn't do them all, do them NOW!  They have helped many be successful, and are part of the work required to get this done.

Promise yourself you will come here and blog "HELP" before you ever light another cigarette.  We can talk you down off that ledge!

Stay close!  You CAN do this.  Let us help.

Nancy

[JACKIE1-25-15]

/blogs/Storm.3.1.14-blog/2015/08/03/the-question-to-reset-or-not-to-reset 

[Barbscloud]

Good morning Kandy.  Welcome to the Ex.  I don't know where to start.  You've touched on it all--and it's all normal.  Most of us have multiple attempts and feel disappointed in ourselves when we fail.  Don't look at that way.   It serves no purpose, so look at it as a learning experience.  What can I do differently this time?  Anxiety, agitation, etc.  are normal side effects of withdrawal.  This is when you use whatever tools you've identified.  Go for a walk, deep breathing, etc.  And, non-smokers probably don't understand how hard it is to quit or the physical/psychological effects when we do.  

Read as much on this site to educate yourself about nicotine addiction and create a quit plan if you didn't so before.  These two steps made quitting possible for me.  And, having the support from other quitters helps to make quitting a reality.   We're here for you, so just reach out anytime you need encouragement or want to share your journey.  Remember reach out before you smoke--not after.  That's what we're here for.

Barb

Here's something to share with y0ur loved ones:

Anacondahead's Letter to a Loved One 

[MarilynH]

Welcome to the community Kandy I really can't add anything that has not already been mentioned above me please read everything you can because there's a wealth of information right here on this site to strengthen your resolve to kick the nicotine poison to the curb permanently it's not easy by any stretch of the imagination BUT with commitment and perseverance you will succeed in living a life of Freedom deep breaths and believe in yourself because we believe in you....