I want to smoke

[Patvette]

I want to smoke more now then I did when I first quit it’s been 3 1/2 months I am miserable and depressed. I just want to smoke but my lungs are so bad. I don’t feel like they have gotten any better either I just don’t cough all the tome

[sweetplt]

Before you smoke, please see a Doctor about your depression.  Make sure it isn’t your thyroid or something physical causing your depression.  If it isn’t physical then see if you need help in order to get through your depression.  Often we masked depression with smoking and now we have to find ways to handle it.  Don’t smoke...you will feel worse physically and mentally, you only think you will feel better.   Don’t throw away 3 1/2 months of your quit away...Gotcha in my prayers right now...~ Colleen 436 DOF 

[indingrl]

Welcome and thank you so much for sharing YOUR experience strength and hope wirh ME - NO WORRIES- YOUR not alone  - YOUR doing good - drinking water with lemon helps flush the toxins out of system and exercising HELPS with the EMOTIONS and finding a NEW hobbie HELPS to focus and gain a NEW perspective - educating YOUR self on reading all the info offered here HELPS with gaining NEW ideas to get a NEW MINDSET as a non smoker - in EARLY quitting- I was coughing too -  it is YOUR lungs cleaning the toxins out - YOUR EMOTIONS will have ups and down and will vary and the FACT is in 3 days -  ALL NICOTINE - is out of YOUR system PHYSICALLY - the rest of the battlefield is in YOUR mind - getting NEW ways of coping -   to clean out OLD ADDICT thinking - OLD ADDICT patterns - OLD ADDICT habits - please take what HELPS and let go of the rest - to be HELPFUL is MY only aim - thank you - please be kind and gentle with YOUR self - it takes TIME and YOUR doing GOODplease just keep blogging BEFORE YOU take that first puff over YOU - sucking on death will not change the uncomfortable part 

[marciem]

Hi there, Patvette‌... Welcome!!  CONGRATULATIONS on 3 1/2 months smoke free!!

You've gotten excellent advice above regarding dealing with your depression.

I have a comment and maybe a question or so.

First off... NO, you do not want to smoke.  If you liked smoking or wanted to smoke, you would not have made the (wonderful) decision to quit.  What you really want is the comfort of the relief from withdrawal that smoking gave you when you lit up.  That's basically what it was... smoke... nicotine hit... put cigarette out... withdrawal begins... smoke again... nicotine hit... etc. etc. and over and over and yes it felt good when that withdrawal was relieved with our drug of choice.

BUT... if you smoke now, you will not be getting that same relief, as you are no longer under the spell of that addiction.  You may get some relief with the familiarity of the old habitual motions and actions, but ultimately you will be angry and disappointed with yourself.

Ok, that's all I have to say about that.

Question... you say your lungs are "so bad"... have you been diagnosed with a lung disease?  The fact that you are not coughing shows that you are no longer irritating your lungs, which is a good thing.  I ask if you have been diagnosed, because if you have COPD, it will probably not get better without some medication, but the upside is that as long as you don't smoke, it will not progress as quickly as it would if you continued to smoke.

Best wishes to you.  Remember this.... If you smoke now, you will be back where you started.  Where you started was desperately wishing you were where you are right now.

Nobody has EVER said 'Gee I'm so glad I started back up smoking', after a long abstinence like you have!!

[sweetplt]

Please check in with us...Gotcha in my thoughts ~ Colleen 

[Patvette]

I liked that if I smoke now I will me wishing I was were I am now.  Thank you

[sweetplt]

Keep close to us for support ...we will help you...and so want you to keep your beautiful quit...

[Barbscloud]

The emotional part lasted a good while for me, so hang it there.  You have 3.5 months of success you don't want to lose.  I believe you'e nearing the end of NML's, so that may be what you're experiencing now.  Stay close.

Barb

[Patvette]

What is

Nml

Sent from my iPhone

[Barbscloud]

Wish you would have heard about this sooner.  I have found it so helpful knowing what we might expect on this journey.  Here's a description.

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex/blog/2011/05/24/no-mans-land-days-30-to130-appr...