minihorses
Sorry to hear about your husband's dad. My thoughts go out to you.
I get that you're hurting. But I think you need to grant the community here some slack as I don't think there was intentional lack of responses to your posts. I've met some of the most active members here on the site and there is a lot of compassion. A lot, sometimes I think people actually care about the person's quit more than the person cares about their own quit. While I see was emotional not to get support when you needed it please have some understanding that suggesting some people were intentionally doing this might make it emotionally challenging to respond to you. Just was our site rules encourage our members to be understanding and helpful helpers as someone getting support it makes it difficult to give someone support when they're upset at the very people who freely give their time to offer help and support.
I've managed a couple peer-to-peer support communities in my day and one of the main things is you have to be just as gracious about receiving help as you are at giving it. Text based communication can be tough and we need to give people the benefit of the doubt. If something is frustrating, ask a question, get clarification before getting upset. No doubt quitting is a challenging journey(as evidenced by many journey's posted here) so even more leniency is needed. People who come here and ask for support must be open-minded and receptive to being helped. I've learned that when combative/accusatory posts are made, helpers may overlook those posts in favor of other posts where the person seems willing to be helped. So if you want help, be open and receptive. Just as a smoker needs the desire to quit, a person seeking support and help here must be truly willing to accept the support they're provided.
A little explanation of how the community works:
When you update your root post in your blog https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/community/conversations/blog/2019/08/29/prayers-for-husbands-fami... it didn't notify everyone on the post. So no one really knew or was alerted that that had happened. Had you replied then everyone on the thread would have been alerted who was subscribed even if you moved it out of your personal blog into the Conversations area. The title update helped but still doesn't pop out. Also with blogs they don't bubble to the top of the home page like other content types and the link for the latest content sorts by created date when clicked from the home page. Since your blog was from 8/28 it would need to be sorted by last activity which goes by the last comment date and may not(need to test myself to be sure) bump things to the top if you edit the root post of a blog.
You can also tag something Prayer_circle and that will help bring attention to times when you need some extra prayers. You can do an easy one-click prayer request in Prayer Circle
Mark
EX Community Manager
EX Community Admin Team
- YOUR NOT forgotten and NOT ALONE- gentle hug
