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Give and get support around quitting

Quit date set for 6/24. Worried and questioning my ability.

About a week ago I decided that I want to quit smoking. I have severe anxiety and even thinking about it increases it. I lost my mother 2 years ago, she was 60 years old. She needed a heart and had an LVAD. Her actual cause of death was her trach was pulled out while they were moving her in the hospital. I was diagnosed with PTSD when I was 21. On July 24th, 2017 (11 months on June 24th) my blood pressure was out of control.. like 196/204 (I think?) and I decided then I wanted to live. My average BP was around 180/90 with meds. I no longer had health insurance so I no longer had meds. I have since that moment lost -130 lbs., 6 lbs. to go until I have lost half of my body weight. I can't wait until my goal to quit smoking. I was worried about weight gain but now not so much since I am super active. I don't have much family. My brother was diagnosed with cancer 6 years ago, not yet a cure. He was healthy, never a smoker. I am a wife and a mother. I don't smoke in the house or car and my husband only knows that I smoke. I have been a smoker for 20 years. Again, I am making this decision because I want to live. I don't want to leave my children without a mother if I can do something about it. I feel that smoking makes me feel better, it calms me down. This may be in my head. I am worried that I won't be ok. I feel lost, alone and feel like I need them. I am going to start with the patches. I have hope that they will help me though I am super worried. I can't even go an hour without a cigarette without having to go out again. I know I am saying can't and I can. I have to quit. This is not an option and I CAN and WILL do this!! I am still worried and question my ability. I worry about smoking in the mornings, not sure if the patch will help me with these things. I know it will be baby steps, one moment at a time. Looking at my future as a non-smoker is too much for me. I often put way to much thought into everything. I hope that it's easier than it is in my thoughts. Does the patch help with not wanting a cigarette? How long does it usually last, the thought of wanting one? Does this happen throughout the day, like is it worse in the mornings? I know everyone is different. I tried to google information and there is just too much for me to process. I'm just not sure what to really expect. 

61 Replies

Thank you!

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Welcome aboard.  Once you've completed Smoking Trigger Tracker Tool | Guides & Tools | BecomeAnEX  , please visit Newbie Quittersand read some there and also Best of EX.  Therein contains some very useful and timeless knowledge saved to share with those that are serious about quitting smoking and also understanding how nicotine works inside our brains and bodies, How Nicotine Addiction takes over (and what to do about it!) .  Be sure to use the search feature (the magnifying glass) on the right-hand side of your screen to find answers to questions you may have along the way.  I can guarantee you that at some point or another someone at sometime has or had the same feelings you are questioning.  We're just a bunch of former smokers helping other smokers quit and stay quit !!!! 

When I first quit, I started cold turkey and it wasn't for me.  I used the patch.  Do as much reading and follow the guidelines above and prepare yourself for your quit day or for that matter when you feel you're ready, just do it.  I never set a quit date because it was like an impending doom for me.  I'd find an excuse somewhere to put it off and put it off.  We welcome nosy people.  So poke around here as much as you can.  Go to ELDER'S LIST and click on some of their profiles by simply clicking on their names and read about their journeys under the content tab.  You can filter by date created:  oldest first.  It will sort it by the very first blog they had ever written.  Some of us write a lot and some write very little.  It will give you a little preview of what may lie ahead.

C‌ongratulations on making the decision to quit.  Just remember you are in control and not your dependency on nicotine or smoking.  You can do this !!!!

Thank you so much! It looks like I have some reading to do!

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YoungAtHeart
Member

Welcome to our community!

Don't despair!  A lot of us felt as you are feeling when we contemplated quitting smoking.  You are entering unknown territory.  While there is an overwhelming amount of information out there, I will specifically recommend reading things that worked for ME (and I quit on my first and only attempt and have been quit almost 6 years!).

If you only read one thing, I highly recommend Allen Carr's “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking.” This is an easy and entertaining read. You can search for it online or at your local library.  It provides a wealth of information on what this addiction does to your body AND mind.  This addiction has two parts - the physical (nicotine) and the psychological (the associations and triggers with smoking).  We will help you with BOTH parts.

You should also read the posts here and perhaps go to the pages of folks who you think might be helpful. You might visit whyquit.com, quitsmokingonline.com and livewell.com for the good information contained there - as you can. @https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex has lots of blogs written by members of this site with their experiences and guidance.It's important that you  do the tracking and separation exercises suggested in My Quit Plan http://www.becomeanex.org/my-quit-plan.php

After you have completed the recommended reading, it will be time to make an informed choice of the quit aid, if any, you will use. If you go that route, I personally recommend the aids that don't let the addict control the dose such as the available prescription drugs or the patch. Be sure to match dosages to the amount you smoke.  If it's a pack a day, you need a product that provides about 20 mg of nicotine.  If used properly, gum, lozenges and inhalers are fine, but they need to be used only as a last resort.  I have seen folks become addicted to them if they substitute them for every cigarette they used to smoke - just trading one addiction for another.  I do not recommend the e-cigarette for three reasons: 1) the vapor has been compared to the polluted air in Bejing on a bad day, 2) they just provide another nicotine delivery system while continuing the hand to mouth smoking motion, and 3) the batteries can spontaneously catch on fire. . But – any method that you think will work well for you will be best for you.

The idea is to change up your routines so the smoking associations are reduced.  Drink your coffee with your OTHER hand in a place different from when you smoked. Maybe switch to tea for a bit.  If you always had that first smoke with your coffee, try putting your tennies on right out of bed, going for a quick walk, then taking your shower and THEN your coffee! Rearrange the furniture in the areas you used to smoke so the view is different. Buy your gas at a different station. Take a different route to work. Take a quick walk at break time where the smokers AREN'T.

You need to distract yourself through any craves.  You can take a bite out of a lemon (yup - rind and all), put your head in the freezer and take a deep breath of cold air, do a few jumping jacks, go for a brisk walk or march in place, play a computer game.  Keep a cold bottle of water with you from which to sip. Don't let that smoking thought rattle around in your brain unchallenged. Sometimes you need to quit a minute or an hour at a time.  You will need to be disciplined in the early days to distract yourself when a crave hits.    Get busy!  Here is a link to a list of things to do instead of smoke if you need some fresh ideas:

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/Youngatheart.7.4.12-blog/2013/02/25/100-things-to-do-instea...

The conversation in your head in response to the "I want a cigarette" thought needs to be, "Well, since I have decided not to do that anymore, what shall I do instead for the three minutes this crave will last?"  Then DO it.  You will need to put some effort into this in the early days, but it gets easier and easier to do.

Stay close to us here and ask questions when you have them and for support when you need it. We will be with you every step of the way!

Nancy

Thank you Nancy, I really appreciate your feedback!

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indingrl
Member

Just for today you are doing good and you will be ok i welcome you and thank you for sharing i love you 

Thank you very much.

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I will definitely check out the sites and groups later. I am on my phone which seems to be a bit complicated for me as I am not yet updated with technology.☺ I really appreciate your replies, I definitely feel a little better this evening. I'm thinking about quitting before my quit date if possible. I really don't want to buy one more pack of cigarettes. 

CommunityAdmin
Community Manager
Community Manager

WereAllMadHere wrote:

I will definitely check out the sites and groups later. I am on my phone which seems to be a bit complicated for me as I am not yet updated with technology.☺ I really appreciate your replies, I definitely feel a little better this evening. I'm thinking about quitting before my quit date if possible. I really don't want to buy one more pack of cigarettes. 

Yes checking out the site more extensively will be easier on a tablet in landscape or on a computer. Your phone can help you stay connected in times of craves or when you're out and about.  Please note that you can also reply via email to many of the notifications to stay involved throughout the day. It will reply to whomever you you received the notification from. Please note that if you have a signature(with personal information) when replying from email that you should remove it before you reply or put 5 underscores at the end of your post (before your signature) so that any text after the underscores will be ignored and not posted to the site.

Also if you check out your My Quit Stats it will show your countdown to quitting. Yesterday you were at 10 packs of cigs still left to buy. Certainly any way to minimize that the better if you can quit sooner.

Mark
EX Community Manager

EX Community Admin Team

Thank you so much! I definitely will. I just signed on the desktop, which is much better, but I need to spend some time on here as it is much different.  I am hoping not to buy anymore and hoping to be ready by the time I am out. Today I am going to try to cut down as well.

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