Quit date set for 6/24. Worried and questioning my ability.

[WereAllMadHere]

About a week ago I decided that I want to quit smoking. I have severe anxiety and even thinking about it increases it. I lost my mother 2 years ago, she was 60 years old. She needed a heart and had an LVAD. Her actual cause of death was her trach was pulled out while they were moving her in the hospital. I was diagnosed with PTSD when I was 21. On July 24th, 2017 (11 months on June 24th) my blood pressure was out of control.. like 196/204 (I think?) and I decided then I wanted to live. My average BP was around 180/90 with meds. I no longer had health insurance so I no longer had meds. I have since that moment lost -130 lbs., 6 lbs. to go until I have lost half of my body weight. I can't wait until my goal to quit smoking. I was worried about weight gain but now not so much since I am super active. I don't have much family. My brother was diagnosed with cancer 6 years ago, not yet a cure. He was healthy, never a smoker. I am a wife and a mother. I don't smoke in the house or car and my husband only knows that I smoke. I have been a smoker for 20 years. Again, I am making this decision because I want to live. I don't want to leave my children without a mother if I can do something about it. I feel that smoking makes me feel better, it calms me down. This may be in my head. I am worried that I won't be ok. I feel lost, alone and feel like I need them. I am going to start with the patches. I have hope that they will help me though I am super worried. I can't even go an hour without a cigarette without having to go out again. I know I am saying can't and I can. I have to quit. This is not an option and I CAN and WILL do this!! I am still worried and question my ability. I worry about smoking in the mornings, not sure if the patch will help me with these things. I know it will be baby steps, one moment at a time. Looking at my future as a non-smoker is too much for me. I often put way to much thought into everything. I hope that it's easier than it is in my thoughts. Does the patch help with not wanting a cigarette? How long does it usually last, the thought of wanting one? Does this happen throughout the day, like is it worse in the mornings? I know everyone is different. I tried to google information and there is just too much for me to process. I'm just not sure what to really expect. 

[WereAllMadHere]

I don't think I mentioned I smoke around 1 pack per day, smoke only outside and am around no other smokers. I am a stay at home mom.

[momoffour28]

I am a stay at home mom to and feel you but I live with smokers, so mom to mom I know being a stay at home mom can sometimes be frustrating but thinking about it now I think that im doing this not only for me but my kids. so message me if u want and we can talk mom to mom 

[TBenyi]

I am currently on the patch and day 9 of not smoking. It's important that you start with the correct patch. I started with step two which wasn't strong enough and went back to smoking so had a false start and new quit date. Now that I'm on step 1 it is helping. I know this because I have tried and failed cold turkey. It was much harder than quitting with the patch. Though the withdrawal is over with quicker if you go cold turkey by my understanding. I still get cravings and my addiction trying to convince me to take off the patch and smoke. I still have to work at it, but the withdrawal isn't as intense. It does make it easier for me to say N.O.P.E when my brain is trying to tell me to smoke and gives me a chance to grab a piece of gum, a mint or distract myself with something. This way I am able to deal with the mental or psychological addiction and break the "habit". Deal with my triggers and identify those which I didn't realize I had, while slowly weaning off the nicotine. It gives me a chance to get used to being a non-smoker and reduces the intensity of the withdrawal once I do get off the patch for good.

All that being said, what works for some doesn't work for others and there are a lot of options out there. Not just NRT but also medications. I have tried and failed with many. The closest I personally got to being nicotine free was with the patch.

You CAN do this. It took me many attempts and I have found that this site has been the best resource and most helpful. You are in the right place. Welcome to EX.

[WereAllMadHere]

Thank you so much and Congrats!! I just ordered $20 in mints and gum so I have them ready. I also ordered the Step 1 patches. I really appreciate your reply and wish you the best!!

[CommunityAdmin]

Welcome.  Congrats on setting a quit date. You can get it to appear on the community by following these directions Re: How do I get my quit date to show on the community?

Mark
EX Community Manager

[WereAllMadHere]

Thank you very much Mark! I followed your instructions, I hope it worked! 

[CommunityAdmin]

It didn't. Be sure you log out using this link. Once you log back in it should resync to community and you should be all set.

Mark
EX Community Manager

[WereAllMadHere]

I followed both and logged out, not sure if it is worked. Thank you Mark.

[CommunityAdmin]

It's working now I can see your quit stats. If you choose to move your quit date sooner, after you update it on My Quit Plan. You just log out and back in, just the same and it will update on your quit stats.

Mark
EX Community Manager