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Newbie Quitters

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Words have power.  What you are telling yourself is very important in life as in quitting smok9ing.  Anyone who knows me understands that I hardly ever use the word struggle.  I prefer to replace it with the word challenge.  Which sets your mind up to be willing to meet the challenge.  I am not saying that we do not have struggles in life but your preception can put a lot of weight on the trials, temptations, and weaknesses that we EXperience. 

Let just look at those two words for right now.

Struggle- make forceful or violent efforts to get free of restraint or constriction.

Challenge -a call or summons to engage in any contest, as of skill, strength, etc.something that by its nature or character serves as a call to battle, contest, special effort, etc.:

Which one will make it easier?  Not easy but Easier!

What you say to yourself matters.  Whatever you tell your brain has a major impact on your life and your quit smoking journey.  If you are constantly feeding your brain negative thoughts.  What will you get? ….Negative results

As a wise elder once said, "It is what's between the ears".  The writer James Allen states, "As a man thinketh so is he"

The goal is to Debrief, Debunk  Deprogram the thinking that you need or have to have a cigarette. We have told ourselves that so many times  It is time to deprogram those thoughts. In order to do that, imagine washing your brain of that brainwashing thought. One way to do that is through self-talk.

 Let’s just look at a few.

 “I can’t do this”. ( you have already given up).  Say: Yes, I can do this!

“This is hard”.  (That is a reality when it comes to quitting smoking.)   Yes, it is hard but I can do it!

“I am struggling”. (Sounds like you will never make it). This is a "challenge" that I can meet.

 “I will never make it”.  Keep telling yourself... I am going to make it. No matter what!

“I never could do anything right”.   Say I can do this!  I won't give up.  

“I am so stupid”.  (You are doomed if you keep saying this one.)   What a man thinks so is he.

The more I live, the more I learn.  I am becoming more firm in my belief that there is a reason for everything.  I started writing this several days ago and today 8/26 this blog popped up with a like on my response.  It was confirmation for me to continue this blog and that I was on the right track in helping those who "struggle".

Here is a blog from Barbscloud early in her journey. If you re struggling make it a challenge to make it easier.… 

Change what you are telling yourself and change your life.


Some of you may know me, some may not.  I have not been here on a regular basis as I use to. I won't make EXcuses.  It just is what it is.  I had been mentally exhausted. I felt a disconnect because I did not have much to say that I already had not said.  I go through things just like the rest.  How I deal with them is still a learning EXperience for me.   Over 5.5 years ago I used cigarettes as my crutch.  I had not developed the skills of dealing on life terms without the immediate hit from a cigarette.  These last few months have been up and down emotionally but thank God He has given me friends and family to help me through it along with the knowledge that I do not have to smoke.  That it is my choice and my commitment, to honor it.  No matter how old we get, life is still a learning EXperience.  I think I am young until an old lady at the pier called me ma'am  ( just a little side joke) There were days that I would be in despair but knew that I would be okay because of my faith and the life that my sister and father lived. Normally I take the bull by the horns and charge forward.  I did not have that energy for EX.  Being honest and keeping it real.  I had to protect myself from the Pandemic and deal with all of the images of violence was at times draining. Through prayer and understanding, I/we will be okay.   


Anyway, the point that I would like to relay is if you are new at this quit thing, please, please don't give up. No matter what you are going through you do not have to smoke. Life is going to happen and if you stick to NOPE you can make this quit thing a reality.  It can be hard at times but just keep telling yourself that you can make it and do the things you need to do to stay smoke-free.  It is called WORK.  In time to have a smoke will not be that important.  If you hang tough and never give up one day no matter what you are going through will never be a reason to smoke but an EXcuse.  Sure you may have thoughts but in time the thought of smoking will be a glimmer that floats into nonexistence.  Be aware of your triggers and work through those moments.  One moment at a time.  You will survive.  You will not die if you do not smoke.  You will die if you continue to smoke zit all boils down to a choice.   Somethings are easier to get through than others but in time no matter how great the crisis you will make it through and smoking will not be part of it.   Sometimes it is the little things that can cause you to slip, so know what those little things are. and BREATH> If is a person, place or thing learn how to work around it.  If you have to smoke if you are around smokers don't be around smokers.  If you have to smoke if you drink don't drink.  "Keep it Simple"...  Stay true to your quit.  It is yours and worth saving.  I hope this does not sound rhetorical. I also have learned it can get that way when you are trying to help someone realize they do not have to smoke. Thanks for all those who reached out to me during this season of my life.  Love back at you. The journey continues...


The Process

Posted by Christine13 Jun 3, 2020

This is all a process to go through.  From the first few days, to the first week, 2nd week, 3 week, one month.

Two months, 3 months on onward to permanent freedom.  I will be patient with the process.  And my days will add up like pearls on a string.  Quitting is a journey, not an event.  I understand that now.


I'm Ready

Posted by imepiphany May 19, 2020

Thirty years and thirty attempts...

That's how long I've smoked and how many times I've tried to quit.

I know the dangers.  Watched my grandmother defeat lung cancer twice only to die of emphysema-related COPD.  It was horrible watching her struggle just to breathe.

This time, I'm getting prepared to be successful, first by joining this site.

I know I need the support, encouragement, tips, motivation and accountability.  

The second by beginning to take Chantix.

I've been holding onto this prescription since last summer, afraid of the side effects.

My quit date is one week from today so I took my first dose yesterday.

So far, so good and I feel great.  

My quit plan is complete.

And I just ordered flowers to arrive next Friday, to congratulate myself for making it through those first three days.  


I occasionally read my archived blogs to NEF.  I woke up early this morning.  It was earlier that what I thought.  I looked at the clock wrong so here I am as I use to be, at EX reading in the wee hours of the morning. I was reading a blog in which I quoted my dad about quitting smoking. He said, “You can do whatever you set your mind to do”.  That was years ago and I still remember it. Of course, I have used those words of wisdom in other areas of my life but I never applied them to quitting smoking.  It may sound cliches but believe it!  With the right mindset and education, you can be successful in quitting smoking ...and anything else.  Along this journey, you may hear a lot of cliches but many are so true.  Believe it Achieve it.  Deep breathing... on and on.  With a support system like the EX community, quitting is so doable.  However, you must remain focused on your decision (e.i.commitment, vow, pledge) and not allow anyone, anything, or reason to pick up a stinkin’ cigarette ever again you will remain free. 

I try to look at the brighter side of life, including this quit smoking thing.  Quitting smoking is the beginning of experiencing real life without a cigarette. Some days it is up and some days down  It can be rough.  Some call it a real live roller coaster. In fact, in the beginning, it may not feel so grand as we go through cravings, urges, withdrawal, fears, anxiety, raw emotions, and discomfort. Some equate quitting as the end of a friendship, or lovers breakup.  To me, it was a “new beginning”.   In my mind, It was “my cleansing”.  With every crave, I felt my body cleansing the toxins/drugs.  At times it was tense and other times a newfound euphoria that only "cleansing" delivered. Whew!  Blowing thinking it about it.  I believe that this mindset made it easier for me.  I was EXcited to be on a brighter path of living that I could be my own best friend.  I learned to love myself more without a "stinkin’ sickerette".   I  began doing things I thought I couldn’t do or had procrastinated doing.  It did not happen overnight it is a continuous process of changing my mind even up to just 20 days away from a 5-year quit. Thank God for the transformation. 

I made up my mind that I would literally never ever touch a cigarette ever again.  I remember reading here someone made a vow never to touch a cigarette lighter therefore they would not smoke.  I went further with my vow. Some of you may know my mantra>  "Not in my hand, not on my lips, not on my tongue, not in my lungs, not in my throat, I will not choke.  A vow not to ever smoke no matter what.  Adhering to your vow is an effective mind tool. You have made up your mind and nothing is going to change it. PERIOD.  NOPE (Not One Puff Ever) says that neither death, divorce, heartbreak, sickness, injury, accident, loneliness, home or job loss _______________ ( fill in the blank). is not an EXcuse to smoke. Make up your mind that you will not use EXcuses.  Get started with a made-up mind to prepare your tool kit.  Implement a plan with a made-up mind. Make a vow to ensure you will protect your quit by any means necessary.  Take smoking off the table and do something different. 101 Things to Do Instead of Smoke Smoking is not an option SINAO. Make up your mind that you can do this no matter.  It is okay if you have to cry, stomp, scream, moan, sing, pray, dance or laugh your way through it.  With a made-up mind, you will not fail. Make up your mind that you are a nonsmoker and you just don't do that anymore! Another thing my dad would always tell me.

"There is no such thing as “can’t”.   BTW my dad just celebrated his 98th BD

Hang tough, never give up, never give in, stay close. 

SELF TALK.  Defeating Self-Talk


WAIT !!!!!!!!!

Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Oct 20, 2019

Maybe that's too many EXclamation marks but I wanted to get your attention so you would get the point.  You say your world is falling apart and you just have to have a puff.  Your mind is telling you that you need or want a cigarette.  NO!  WAIT.  Think about it.  You are stronger than a dead leaf wrapped in paper dipped in thousands of chemicals. It's just a cigarette.


Think about it.  Is it going to bring your world back together again?  Logic:  NO! 

The addiction will lie to you and say yes but don't fall for it.  WAIT! Change your Stinkin Thinkin

NO, you do not have to smoke.


Whether, happy, sad, lonely, tired, hungry, angry, anxious, depressed, sick, stressful, griefing, breakup, job loss, taxes and on and on. Logic: Can a puff from burning dead leaves dipped in poison solve the problem? Hmm, I hear you saying hmm. "Just one".  It is not the one cig but the one puff that will lead to another, 

  A wise Elder once said,

"we are only one puff away from full-blown relapse". 

The addiction to nicotine is the problem. Know the LAW! No matter what. NOPE (Not One Puff Ever). Get past it. Breathe deep and WAIT.  Of course, the thought of smoking will come but if you WAIT, in time those thoughts will be few and far in between.  No matter where you are in your journey be WILLING to WAIT.  Yes, you have to go through withdrawal but this is key...if you WAIT you will be able to stay on a forever journey of freedom from nicotine. 

Don't let the addiction create EXcuses for you. UNDERSTANDING EXCUSES 

 Breathe deep, take out your handy quit kit Quit kit and WAIT. 

Focus on something else. 101 Things to Do Instead of Smoke 

I learned to ride the wave.Surf the Waves!    It is not a fight. Let it flow and WAIT. 

Mentally prepare your mind to WAIT. 

Never give up, Never give in, hang tough, Stay close. Protect your quit.


Early upon joining the EX Community, I heard that phrase frequently. It made a lot of sense to me and caused me to think about how I was going to travel on this journey.  Whether in fear, negativity, failure, and doubt or with confidence believing that I could. What you think and what you say to yourself plays a major role in all aspects of our lives. Even in quitting smoking.  We can come up with tons of EXcuses not to quit Let' s start saying and believing you can. It is our choice whether we win or lose.  So grab this good thought and hold on to it. Grab it!  Hold it!

If you do it will make your journey so much easier. You still have to go through to get to a good place in the quitting process.  There are no miracles just tools to use to make it easier. 

The best and most effective Quit Tool is right between your ears and it's FREE!

READ READ READ! Thomas3.20.2010  4/1/18

Here are a few takes by elder jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007 on the subject. 

.Friends, Smokers, Everyone...Lend Me (What's Between) Your Ears  

Don't Lose Your Marbles, Use Your Marble! 

The Cure For Smoking Is Between Your Ears 

The Power To Succeed Or Fail Is Between Your Ears


 I preach it too. What are you telling yourself?

Talk the Talk 

and so does

AnnetteMMDefeating Self-Talk 


"Keep it Simple"...

Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Aug 14, 2019

Education IS the key to a successful quit

      Read the suggested material:

        Allen Carr's Quit Smoking on pdf on the web. No link allowed


Start with a plan: when and how you are going to do it

    My EX Plan | BecomeAnEX 


Study your triggers and prepare for them

   Getting Ready to Quit | My EX Plan | BecomeAnEX 


Be willing to do whatever is necessary to not smoke

   101 Things to Do Instead of Smoke


Be willing to change people places and things if necessary

NOPE no matter what, when where, how or who

Make a vow and commit to it.

Develop your own mantra.

    " I can do all things through Jesus Christ who strengthens me."

      Connect to your hight power. 


Come here often Research, Read, Study, Blog\, Get Involved.

Pledge Daily 

    Daily Pledge

Ask questions, and offer support by telling your experience

Type HELP if you need it someone will respond

Blog your journey it helps, your written history, you will not regret it.


Learn self Talk -  e.i. "I don't do that anymore"


Hang tough, it is doable if you never give up, never give in. NMW (no matter what)

Make a vow no matter what NOPE, not one puff ever.

Believe that you can and you will,  one day at a time


One urge at a time, one craving at a time, one success at a time.


Just BREATHE your way through it

   3 Deep Breathing Exercises to Reduce Stress & Anxiety - YouTube 


This is a journey, not an event but life-changing

Be willing to relearn your thinking and behavior

Learn that you do not have to smoke


Be willing to do the work to protect your quit

Quitting is the easy part, staying quit requires the work


If you drink alcohol and need to smoke, do not drink

If you have to smoke if you are around smokers don't be


No turning back know the law. Freedom's "The Law of Addiction" thread: Page 1 


Foundation For A Successful Quit

In the beginning, it may be hard but believe me, when I say, the hardship doesn’t last forever.  If we throw in the towel we will not experience the freedom and better life that comes from never taking another puff. NOPE  Sure, this may be one of your greatest "challenges" in life but know that it is doable   We won’t succeed if we give up because it gets difficult.   I said difficult, not impossible.   Anything new requires a learning process with the requirement to learn how to endure, compromise, accept and make sacrifices (changes) to accomplish the goal. By committing with willingness to do whatever is necessary to move forward you can make it.

*Make your mind up and know whatever you are going through will not last forever and you will make it.  Each experience that you go through in quitting is a learning tool for the next hurdle you have to cross.   Each time you cross a hurdle and do not succumb to taking a puff you will become stronger.   Trust me on this one it works.  Just never give up no matter what.


There may be days all you can think about is smoking.  Imagine telling yourself for so many years that you need and want a cigarette.  It takes time to change that thought. So start telling yourself that you don't need a cigarette. Literally, out loud.  " No, I do not need a cigarette."  That is reprogramming your brain. Give it time and don’t give up.  It can be done.  Know that this will not last forever and of course just because you think of something does not mean you have to do it. It will be so worth not giving up. 


You may have to deal with some sleepless nights.  Know that it will not last forever.  Make it a priority find ways to make it through with a no matter what attitude.  Take smoking out of the equation.  Do something else. Come here blog, read and learn about nicotine addiction. Take on a hobby, do something you have been procrastinating about  If you have questions, ask.  


There is no quick fix, no drug, no patch, lozenge, gum that is going to totally do it for you. These are only quit tools that help to make it easier until you can stand on your own You have to be willing to do the work to cross each hurdle one at a time.   Do not get ahead of yourself. Even if you don't jump over the hurdle you can climb putting one leg over at a time or crawl under, just continue on this journey by any means necessary.  Quitting smoking takes work, therefore, plan, prepare and practice.  It will get easier just never give up. 

In the meantime, hang tough, stay close, don’t give up, don’t give in protect your quit 

I am a nonsmoker 1643 DOF


Take a Breather

Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Jul 17, 2019

There are times that so much is going on in our lives that we have to stop and take a breather.  Well, if you can't stop, how about slowing it down.  Your journey will have a better chance to continue. Early on in my quit if I got EXcited, Upset, Angry, Fearful it would be a smoke.   I would try my best to remain calm and slow things down. That may not have always worked; but with practice, I learned that breathing was a great cure for getting through a craving/relieve stress.


Today in Virginia it is HOT!. It probably is hot in other places too but f you are curious of what hell maybe like you could come here.  Just kidding I am not complaining.  I take whatever I am given.  Can't change it, so I  just adjust.  Thank God for AC. Anyway, as I am on my way out in this heat while getting into my car I noticed I was taking in air and blowing out air.  I thought if someone saw me now they would wonder what is the world is wrong with me but that is what I do.  Automatically, it is still my #1 tool kit skillset.    We have always heard to take a deep breath to calm down.  Even taught to breathe deep when having babies.  We have a tendency to just pass it off and never give it a try.  So I am passing this crave buster tip . to you.  BREATHE  It works  After 4 years 5months it is still an automatic release of stress for me.  NOPE  Today was a reminder. The very best part, I can take it anywhere I go and it really WORKS!  Whatever you are going through...



The journey continues...


Goodness Gracious

Posted by Debfawcett Jun 13, 2019

Day 8 ...  cravings are a kickin ... good thing I know how to kick too.  So I'm going to get real. Anybody out there other than me challenged with a mental health diagnosis?   I've  been in therapy for years and whats cool is I get to pull from the skills I've learned to fight against this addiction. Let's call it what it is.  Today and yesterday have been like nails on a chalk board.  But I read and  re read the info on this website.  Its amazing.  Thank you to all who are willing to put themselves out there to help newbies and oldies.     


Yaay ... still smoke free

Posted by Debfawcett Jun 10, 2019

Day 6 ..... thank you Ex Community for your support.  Chewing straws has really helped.  Broke out a new puzzle that I saved for my quit date.  It certainly keeps my hands busy



Posted by Alicatsam May 18, 2019

I'm on day 11 and it's all day rain and I'm in the last smoking-allowed building in the city. Rainy weather makes the cravings worse, and of course I don't have to go out to smoke. Roommate has cigarettes and there is a store right across the street.

I started to panic so I put in a patch a little while ago.

I'm trying to hang in there until I have to go to work in less than 2 hours, where I can't smoke indoors. 

Hard to focus on anything else, hard to distract from the thoughts with reading or watching or doing anything.

Just trying to hang in there another couple of hours. 

There's also the thought of having to put rain gear on myself and my dog and the 20 min walk in the cold and rainy to get to work. That makes me need a calming smoke too.

I'm gonna try chewing on sugar free gum until I feel sick. I got the nicotine gum too, but that makes me cough and feel nauseous after a few chews.


Baby Steps

Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Apr 25, 2019

To all the newbies and anyone starting over. Take Baby steps you will go further.  One day at a time even if you have to break it down to half a day or 3/4. 

If necessary take it by the hour OR  a minute to make it a lot easier. 

Quitting is doable with a plan...

It is not a race (Breathe) but a journey which is doable. SHNNP

Stay close,

Hang tough,

Never give up,

Never give in

Protect your quit.  

Image may contain: text

In this journey to quit, we know our ultimate destination (to become tobacco-free), yet focusing too far into the future can make us impatient with the present, frustrated with the bumps along the path.  When we set manageable goals for ourselves, it can become easier to concentrate on moving forward, one day at a time.

Dr. Hayes,  Mayo Clinic 5/11/16Baby Steps 

Most people believe they are not extraordinary and they will never do anything special with their life. They don’t want to get their hopes up because they have been disappointed in the past, therefore are reluctant to aim for particular goals in life for fear of failure. It has often been said, “If you don’t aim for anything, you will probably get it".  We are bigger and stronger than we think. We are bigger than a cigarette.  Stronger than a bunch of dried of leaves dipped in nicotine wrapped in paper. 


Be of good courage that you can quit.  Yes, it is a challenge which requires the willingness to let it go not will power.  It takes a willingness to do whatever is necessary, by any means necessary to overcome the grasshopper mentality to quit smoking.  Education is the greatest key to a successful quit.  Arm yourself with knowledge about nicotine addiction.  Read, Study, Research.  Educate your way to freedom and get rid of the grasshopper mentality. 


A grasshopper mentality is the death of dreams and goals, and usually prevents people from having big dreams and plans for the future. Believe that you can achieve. Don't let fear dominate your thinking.  Several routes to overcome the grasshopper mentality here at EX is to read/listen to positives instead of negatives,  Positive Affirmations and Support make a pledge everyday Daily Pledge.  Commit to your quit.  Bookend your days @EX.  We are here to support you. 


“You are more than conquerors through him who loved us.” Romans 8:37

You can do this.  All things are possible if you believe. 


Work your quit.