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Newbie Quitters

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Early upon joining the EX Community, I heard that phrase frequently. It made a lot of sense to me and caused me to think about how I was going to travel on this journey.  Whether in fear, negativity, failure, and doubt or with confidence believing that I could. What you think and what you say to yourself plays a major role in all aspects of our lives. Even in quitting smoking.  We can come up with tons of EXcuses not to quit Let' s start saying and believing you can. It is our choice whether we win or lose.  So grab this good thought and hold on to it. Grab it!  Hold it!

If you do it will make your journey so much easier. You still have to go through to get to a good place in the quitting process.  There are no miracles just tools to use to make it easier. 

The best and most effective Quit Tool is right between your ears and it's FREE!

READ READ READ! Thomas3.20.2010  4/1/18

Here are a few takes by elder jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007 on the subject. 

.Friends, Smokers, Everyone...Lend Me (What's Between) Your Ears  

Don't Lose Your Marbles, Use Your Marble! 

The Cure For Smoking Is Between Your Ears 

The Power To Succeed Or Fail Is Between Your Ears


 I preach it too. What are you telling yourself?

Talk the Talk 

and so does

AnnetteMMDefeating Self-Talk 


"Keep it Simple"...

Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Aug 14, 2019

Education IS the key to a successful quit

      Read the suggested material:

        Allen Carr's Quit Smoking on pdf on the web. No link allowed


Start with a plan: when and how you are going to do it

    My EX Plan | BecomeAnEX 


Study your triggers and prepare for them

   Getting Ready to Quit | My EX Plan | BecomeAnEX 


Be willing to do whatever is necessary to not smoke

   101 Things to Do Instead of Smoke


Be willing to change people places and things if necessary

NOPE no matter what, when where, how or who

Make a vow and commit to it.

Develop your own mantra.

    " I can do all things through Jesus Christ who strengthens me."

      Connect to your hight power. 


Come here often Research, Read, Study, Blog\, Get Involved.

Pledge Daily 

    Daily Pledge

Ask questions, and offer support by telling your experience

Type HELP if you need it someone will respond

Blog your journey it helps, your written history, you will not regret it.


Learn self Talk -  e.i. "I don't do that anymore"


Hang tough, it is doable if you never give up, never give in. NMW (no matter what)

Make a vow no matter what NOPE, not one puff ever.

Believe that you can and you will,  one day at a time


One urge at a time, one craving at a time, one success at a time.


Just BREATHE your way through it

   3 Deep Breathing Exercises to Reduce Stress & Anxiety - YouTube 


This is a journey, not an event but life-changing

Be willing to relearn your thinking and behavior

Learn that you do not have to smoke


Be willing to do the work to protect your quit

Quitting is the easy part, staying quit requires the work


If you drink alcohol and need to smoke, do not drink

If you have to smoke if you are around smokers don't be


No turning back know the law. Freedom's "The Law of Addiction" thread: Page 1 


Foundation For A Successful Quit

In the beginning, it may be hard but believe me, when I say, the hardship doesn’t last forever.  If we throw in the towel we will not experience the freedom and better life that comes from never taking another puff. NOPE  Sure, this may be one of your greatest "challenges" in life but know that it is doable   We won’t succeed if we give up because it gets difficult.   I said difficult, not impossible.   Anything new requires a learning process with the requirement to learn how to endure, compromise, accept and make sacrifices (changes) to accomplish the goal. By committing with willingness to do whatever is necessary to move forward you can make it.

*Make your mind up and know whatever you are going through will not last forever and you will make it.  Each experience that you go through in quitting is a learning tool for the next hurdle you have to cross.   Each time you cross a hurdle and do not succumb to taking a puff you will become stronger.   Trust me on this one it works.  Just never give up no matter what.


There may be days all you can think about is smoking.  Imagine telling yourself for so many years that you need and want a cigarette.  It takes time to change that thought. So start telling yourself that you don't need a cigarette. Literally, out loud.  " No, I do not need a cigarette."  That is reprogramming your brain. Give it time and don’t give up.  It can be done.  Know that this will not last forever and of course just because you think of something does not mean you have to do it. It will be so worth not giving up. 


You may have to deal with some sleepless nights.  Know that it will not last forever.  Make it a priority find ways to make it through with a no matter what attitude.  Take smoking out of the equation.  Do something else. Come here blog, read and learn about nicotine addiction. Take on a hobby, do something you have been procrastinating about  If you have questions, ask.  


There is no quick fix, no drug, no patch, lozenge, gum that is going to totally do it for you. These are only quit tools that help to make it easier until you can stand on your own You have to be willing to do the work to cross each hurdle one at a time.   Do not get ahead of yourself. Even if you don't jump over the hurdle you can climb putting one leg over at a time or crawl under, just continue on this journey by any means necessary.  Quitting smoking takes work, therefore, plan, prepare and practice.  It will get easier just never give up. 

In the meantime, hang tough, stay close, don’t give up, don’t give in protect your quit 

I am a nonsmoker 1643 DOF


Take a Breather

Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Jul 17, 2019

There are times that so much is going on in our lives that we have to stop and take a breather.  Well, if you can't stop, how about slowing it down.  Your journey will have a better chance to continue. Early on in my quit if I got EXcited, Upset, Angry, Fearful it would be a smoke.   I would try my best to remain calm and slow things down. That may not have always worked; but with practice, I learned that breathing was a great cure for getting through a craving/relieve stress.


Today in Virginia it is HOT!. It probably is hot in other places too but f you are curious of what hell maybe like you could come here.  Just kidding I am not complaining.  I take whatever I am given.  Can't change it, so I  just adjust.  Thank God for AC. Anyway, as I am on my way out in this heat while getting into my car I noticed I was taking in air and blowing out air.  I thought if someone saw me now they would wonder what is the world is wrong with me but that is what I do.  Automatically, it is still my #1 tool kit skillset.    We have always heard to take a deep breath to calm down.  Even taught to breathe deep when having babies.  We have a tendency to just pass it off and never give it a try.  So I am passing this crave buster tip . to you.  BREATHE  It works  After 4 years 5months it is still an automatic release of stress for me.  NOPE  Today was a reminder. The very best part, I can take it anywhere I go and it really WORKS!  Whatever you are going through...



The journey continues...


Goodness Gracious

Posted by Debfawcett Jun 13, 2019

Day 8 ...  cravings are a kickin ... good thing I know how to kick too.  So I'm going to get real. Anybody out there other than me challenged with a mental health diagnosis?   I've  been in therapy for years and whats cool is I get to pull from the skills I've learned to fight against this addiction. Let's call it what it is.  Today and yesterday have been like nails on a chalk board.  But I read and  re read the info on this website.  Its amazing.  Thank you to all who are willing to put themselves out there to help newbies and oldies.     


Yaay ... still smoke free

Posted by Debfawcett Jun 10, 2019

Day 6 ..... thank you Ex Community for your support.  Chewing straws has really helped.  Broke out a new puzzle that I saved for my quit date.  It certainly keeps my hands busy



Posted by Alicatsam May 18, 2019

I'm on day 11 and it's all day rain and I'm in the last smoking-allowed building in the city. Rainy weather makes the cravings worse, and of course I don't have to go out to smoke. Roommate has cigarettes and there is a store right across the street.

I started to panic so I put in a patch a little while ago.

I'm trying to hang in there until I have to go to work in less than 2 hours, where I can't smoke indoors. 

Hard to focus on anything else, hard to distract from the thoughts with reading or watching or doing anything.

Just trying to hang in there another couple of hours. 

There's also the thought of having to put rain gear on myself and my dog and the 20 min walk in the cold and rainy to get to work. That makes me need a calming smoke too.

I'm gonna try chewing on sugar free gum until I feel sick. I got the nicotine gum too, but that makes me cough and feel nauseous after a few chews.


Baby Steps

Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Apr 25, 2019

To all the newbies and anyone starting over. Take Baby steps you will go further.  One day at a time even if you have to break it down to half a day or 3/4. 

If necessary take it by the hour OR  a minute to make it a lot easier. 

Quitting is doable with a plan...

It is not a race (Breathe) but a journey which is doable. SHNNP

Stay close,

Hang tough,

Never give up,

Never give in

Protect your quit.  

Image may contain: text

In this journey to quit, we know our ultimate destination (to become tobacco-free), yet focusing too far into the future can make us impatient with the present, frustrated with the bumps along the path.  When we set manageable goals for ourselves, it can become easier to concentrate on moving forward, one day at a time.

Dr. Hayes,  Mayo Clinic 5/11/16Baby Steps 

Most people believe they are not extraordinary and they will never do anything special with their life. They don’t want to get their hopes up because they have been disappointed in the past, therefore are reluctant to aim for particular goals in life for fear of failure. It has often been said, “If you don’t aim for anything, you will probably get it".  We are bigger and stronger than we think. We are bigger than a cigarette.  Stronger than a bunch of dried of leaves dipped in nicotine wrapped in paper. 


Be of good courage that you can quit.  Yes, it is a challenge which requires the willingness to let it go not will power.  It takes a willingness to do whatever is necessary, by any means necessary to overcome the grasshopper mentality to quit smoking.  Education is the greatest key to a successful quit.  Arm yourself with knowledge about nicotine addiction.  Read, Study, Research.  Educate your way to freedom and get rid of the grasshopper mentality. 


A grasshopper mentality is the death of dreams and goals, and usually prevents people from having big dreams and plans for the future. Believe that you can achieve. Don't let fear dominate your thinking.  Several routes to overcome the grasshopper mentality here at EX is to read/listen to positives instead of negatives,  Positive Affirmations and Support make a pledge everyday Daily Pledge.  Commit to your quit.  Bookend your days @EX.  We are here to support you. 


“You are more than conquerors through him who loved us.” Romans 8:37

You can do this.  All things are possible if you believe. 


Work your quit. 

From day one be on the"mission ". 

The mission to do what?...

  • To let it go...WILLINGNESS
  • To never ever take another puff again. NOPE. 
  • To change your stinking thinking that you do not need or have to have a cigarette. REPROGRAM
  • Start thinking you can quit and you will. DEBUNK the brainwashing
  • To do it no matter what is happening in your life DETERMINATION
  • To EDUCATE  yourself about nicotine addiction. THE KEY TO SUCCESS
  • To come here when you need help.  Don't "try" to do it alone. GET SUPPORT
  • COMMIT and PLEDGE to do whatever is necessary.  Daily Pledge
  • Be WILLING  to change people, places and things if they are a hindrance. 
  • To be PERSISTENT  and PERSEVERE to get past the rough days.  
  • Draw from your Spiritual inner strength  and PRAY that you will make it  NOPE
  • Say "Yes I can instead of can't". Make it your Mission!
  • To do what is necessary to change your life to never ever take another puff. 
  • Make staying quit your Mission, PROTECT YOUR  QUIT it is your own.

You own Mission in life can be pursued with almost religious enthusiasm and be successful in making those changes.

 Self Talk

What you say to yourself matters.  Whatever you tell your brain has a major impact on your life and your quit smoking journey.  If you are constantly feeding your brain negative thoughts.  What will you get? ….Negative results

The goal is to Debrief, Debunk  Deprogram the stinkin thinkin. 

In order to do that we have to wash the brain of the brainwashing with Self-talk. 

 Let’s just look at a few.

 “I can’t do this”. ( you have already given up).  Say: Yes, I can do this!

“This is hard”.  (That is a reality when it comes to quitting smoking.)   Yes, it is hard but I can do it!

“I am struggling”. (Sounds like you will never make it). This is a "challenge" that I can meet.

 “I will never make it”.  Keep telling yourself... I am going to make it. No matter what!

“I never could do anything right”.   Say I can do this!  I won't give up.  

“I am so stupid”.  (You are doomed if you keep saying this one.)   What a man thinks so is he.

“I look terrible”.  (How about a makeover with the money you save.) Get out of your rut.

Make yourself pretty.  New way New life.  Tell yourself GOOD things

“I can make it.  I can do this.  I am beautiful, I am smart,  I am a nonsmoker. 

I am a conqueror.  I am a winner.  Yes, I can. No matter what comes I will not fail.  I am good at what I do.  I am worth it”.  

Change what you are telling yourself and change your life.

 I am a nonsmoker ."  "I don't do this anymore.”.

Create your own positive self-talk  You can take it wherever you go. 

Say it with fierceness. Practice it in the mirror. 

Hum it, recite it. sing it, cheer it, blog it, think it, believe it. achieve it, be it...!

Say it with fierceness. " I can do this NOPE". 



Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Jan 26, 2019

Some of the newbies may not know me. I don't usually talk about myself but today for the newbies I will. Of course, this is just a highlight, like speed dating. So let me get started. Some may say I am hardcore   Others may say I am real or just plain crazy. I have been called worse but thank God for forgiveness.  My dad says I am smart, most parents do. I call it down to earth and honest.  I think I am funny, caring but very direct. I am so much a bottom line person that sometimes it sucks if you are on the receiving end. Just a heads up.  I am not perfect.  I am still a work in progress.   If you are still living we all are.  I don't believe in holding grudges they are stifling and take too much energy. Yuck!  Just the thought leaves a bad taste in my mouth.  I can easily let go and let God.  Amen. If I say something to offend you let me know.  I am not a mind reader.  If you don't like me, I can accept that too.  I will do my best to honor your wishes. I think fair is fair and will speak out on it when I feel I have to.  Some call that opinionated, My EXcuse, I think it is just in my genes.  When I say I am done, I am done. Bottom line.  I can be hard headed but for some reason, it is hard to be done with someone who gets lost on their quit smoking journey.  I believe I learned that from "Lady E elvan,  and Marilyn.H.July.14.14.  they never give up on anyone, plus I have witnessed the deaths of those who lost their way. (sigh) Therefore, I may be a bit hardcore because of the reality of death if you get permanently lost.

I learned late in life that I have no control over someone else's, thoughts, opinions or actions so I have to remind myself such and every now and then put duct tape over my mouth. I believe in the Holy Trinity, that I can do all things through Jesus Christ who strengthens me. Without Him, I could not have come this far. I have been here for 4 years.  If given a chance I may have a tendency to grow on you.  lol   Yes, I must admit that I am a "little itsy bitsy teenie weenie" hard headed.  My only goal is to help and in that helping, I will be as honest as possible.  Yes, we addicts get offended when our addiction is challenged or questioned.  I often say to myself, "what if I allowed myself to give up just because I did not like what or how someone said something to me about my addiction"  Sure it possibly could have been said in a better way, especially to a newbie. We are all human and come short. My opinion, however, I had made a commitment that no matter what,when.,where who, how I was not going to give up.  No one could run me away.   Not even my own addiction. (hardheaded/hardcore)  btw I call a spade a spade. Now I can't be kept away.  Gee, I am growing.

  I do not have all the answers but in my hardcore mode, I can tell you that giving your quit 100% + can make a difference in your success.  No, it is not easy.  You will have withdrawals, urges, cravings and at times may want to pull your hair out.  You may have to ride an emotional roller coaster to start.  Dealing with insomnia or a partner that still smokes may be at the top of your list.   You may gain a little weight but ALL of it is worth it and quitting is DOABLE.  It is not easy, however, it is not as hard as you THINK,   Change the way you think you can change your life.for the better if you just take the first step.  1) Get a PLAN My EX Plan | BecomeAnEX . and 2) WORK it.  WORK your QUIT !

I remember one of the elders saying there is a time in our lives that we just have to “grow up” and stop depending on a drug to take us through.   Yes, a DRUG that's what nicotine is.  Get mad and get rid of all the lighters, ashtrays, butts, cigarettes etc.  Whatever is in sight that reminds you of smoking get rid of it!  Stop holding on!  If you hold on to cigarettes you should question your quit.   Say No More!  Do whatever is necessary to get started or back on track.  Who wants to be smoking for the rest of their life?   If you are serious about quitting no matter what, NOPE (not one puff ever) you will/can quit.  Those who give themselves an out with doubt may not make it. Step out on faith one day at a time and do this. We are here to help not hurt. Our emotions can be gentle when we first quit. Give us a chance. Give life a chance. The life you save is your own. Get ready, hold on for the ride to freedom from nicotine.  We are here to support you.  




Taken for Granted

Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Jan 14, 2019

Early on my quit smoking journey, I was literally floored when I was advised not to be too confident.   I did not quite understand and could not believe what I was hearing.  I always believed confidence was a great thing to have.  As time passed seeing the slips, fall downs, relapses, mistakes, mishaps I fully understood.   I will not tell you to not be confident.  Yes, we can be confident BUT do NOT take your quit for "granted" no matter what day you are on.  "Taken for granted" is when you have something valuable and you do not take explicit actions to nourish, preserve and flourish it.

   Okay, so you are off to a fantastic start and you are pumped up.  You are EXcited to have finally stopped smoking.  I am writing this blog to let you know that no matter what day you are on the newbie quit has to be continuously loved and nurtured so it will develop to maturity.  This is a forever process that can not be rushed.  I will try my best not to burst your bubble so it is okay to be confident but don't take your quit for granted. 

These are a few signs that you may be taking your quit for granted: 

  • You rarely check-in or not at all.  
  • You don't think it is very important to read the suggested material
  • We send you a message and you do not respond.
  • You do not want to follow the advice of the Elders.
  • You choose not to come here when you have a problem. 
  • You figure you have a few days under your belt so you have got this. 
  • You start to think that you can do it alone and you do not need the support of EX. 
  • Oh, what a slippery slope you start to slide when you drink alcohol prematurely.
  • You don't have a tool kit ready to go at all times or perhaps you don't know what a tool kit is. 
  • You are in denial that you are an addict and smoking is just a "habit" that you can stop anytime.
  • A sure sign you are taking your quit for granted when you act on, "Oh I can have just one puff, one puff will not hurt."  WRONG!@!!!!  This will take you to full-blown relapse.
  • When you start making EXcuses in your head to smoke and you stop thinking no matter what NOPE
  • When your quit is not the number one priority above people, places, or things your quit is definitely being taken for granted and you may be on the brink of losing it.   My advice is to hold on tight, take a deep breath and tell yourself that no matter what is happening in your life I will NOPE and never take my quit for granted no matter how far I am on this journey.  I will do whatever is necessary to be smoke-free.

Here are few blogs that may help make a difference.

Congratulations on Your Newborn Baby Quit! 

What's in YOUR Tool Box? 

Stay Connected 




Day 9

Posted by Hukijunlik Nov 29, 2018

Tonight will be 9 days of not smoking. The last couple days I've been craving even more than I did the few days before. Blehhh. Tonight I'm wondering if I'm going to stick with this, if it's worth it. I kind of thought it would be getting easier...


37 Hours

Posted by missellen Nov 29, 2018

I am back and I am 37 hours into my quit.  My quit date was originally due to be 11/12, then I decided to change it 12/1. Then I got a call Tuesday offering me a job--a job I've wanted for a long time. A job that pays me $14k more a year than my current job and allows me to work from home three days a week. A job that has a strict no nicotine policy and that tests for it during their routine drug screening.  So, I threw the cigs away after that call--37 hours ago.  


I'm not yet scheduled for the test--I'm not sure when it will be; early next week, I assume. Although, the position doesn't start until 1/2/19, they usually want to get this stuff out of the way to ensure they actually will hire you.  


Will that be enough time to pass a nicotine/cotnine test?  If the test is say, Tuesday or Wednesday of next week?  I don't know if it's blood or urine. Needless to say, I'm a wreck worrying about this.  Ah smoking, the gift that keeps on giving.


Yesterday was hellish--probably the worst I've ever felt going through a quit.  I was so out of it and muddled. I left work early, came home and basically went to bed.  This morning is a bit better. I had some coffee and managed to take a shower and clean my kitchen.  I'm getting ready to grocery shop for my mom before I go to work.  I'm armed with lemon water, lifesavers, carrots and gum. Let the games begin!