indingrl.01.06.2011

Anger Inside Of ME

Blog Post created by indingrl.01.06.2011 on Mar 16, 2018

In the newness of MY early RECOVERY the first 30 days were a pink cloud for ME... NEW smells NEW ways NEW THOUGHTS....NEW... NEW.... NEW.... then EMOTIONS....HIT REAL HOT.... ON FIRE A FEELINGS.....OF ANGER SO RAGEFUL ...BLIND SIDED... ME FROM OUTTA NO WHERE and they took MY BREATHE away I was no longer grateful for NOT USING NICOTINE ... then MORE TWISTED EMOTIONS HIT HOTTER....ONE AFTER THE OTHER... until HOT ANGER turned into SELF PITY...... I would USE NICOTINE in the PAST to put out these FIRE of EMOTIONS when they would TRY to surface from the MY grave I TRIED to keep them buried with USING MY DRUG OF CHOICE NICOTINE....MY NEW LIFESTYLE NOW WAS STAYING QUIT and I really didn't care about STAYING STUPID QUIT LIFE WHATEVER STYLE WHO GIVES ATTITUDE....with this HOTTEST ANGER EMOTION...so I did a VENTING blog BEFORE I USED NICOTINE.... and it was SUGGESTED to ME... to take THREE DEEP BREATHES.... to prayer the Serenity Prayer... God grant ME the SERENITY to ACCEPT the things I cannot CHANGE and COURAGE to CHANGE the things I can and the WISDOM to know the difference... then SUGGESTED to watch a COMEDY movie to LEARN to LAUGH and to NOT take MYSELF so seriously.... to take MYSELF and one EMOTION at a time and learn SELF-control and do NOT let MY anger or any EMOTIONS lead ME to USE NICOTINE... to FEEL the FEELING ...do NOT deny the FEELINGS...to ask MYSELF what are YOU angry about... is it from the PAST or are YOU angry about something TODAY or are YOU angry about something in the FUTURE... STOP ....BREATHE....SIT and FIRST THINGS FIRST.... watch the FUNNY movie and THEN get paper and pen and ask YOURSELF the questions then YOU will be able to CONTROL your EMOTIONS discovering where they are coming from and learning NEW ways to COPE and FEEL and to STAY QUIT NO MATTER WHAT while dealing with those FIRST NEW AWAKENED FEELINGS.... YOUR not alone BLOG about any EMOTIONS and WAIT for the LOVE and HELP to come...only by Gods grace today I feel the emotions with SELF-control and live in this DAY only to express MORE joy than anger MORE love than hate and MORE action by LIVING A NON SMOKER LIFESTYLE for ME in MY Lord Jesus name amen just sharing the love please take what HELPS and let go of the rest to he HELPFUL is MY only aim thank you and please keep coming BACK

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