Blog Post created by indingrl on Jan 9, 2021

I was taught to get rid of MY OLD MINDSET and to get a NEW MINDSET




Get up in morning - SMOKE



Prayer and say NotOnePuffEver OUT LOUD over and over and over



I HEAR over and over I NEED a cigarette



Prsyer and I said OUT LOUD - I dont smoke any more and Smoking Is Not An Option and NEVER take another puff over YOU and I prayed ALL the time - please talking about. ME not YOU or anybody



Constant THOUGHT CRAVINGS - CONSTANT FEELINGS craving and craving



Prayer and blog BEFORE you take that first puff over YOU



YOU dont need to blog just SMOKE NOW



Prayer and GO and blog blog blog and tell what is going on and ASK for HELP



Everyday I would come here for ME not YOU or anybody else - I took ALL the suggestions - I tried them and kept TRYING on NEW ideas and NEW quit tools and NEW ways to speak to MYSELF - NEW people to TRUST and to remember NEW MINDSET patterns and ideas to keep learning and remain open minded to grow up on MY insides - I was NOT a ACTIVE USING NICOTINE DRUG ADDICT - I was a recovering NON SMOKER NOW

I am NOT here for a popularity contest - I am here and I am NOT wanting to DIE for a cigarette  because I WANT a to live for MY Lord Jesus MORE then I want to suck on a death stick - I took the SUGGESTION - to bite into a lemon peel and all - by Dale - giving him credit for HIS suggestion in his blog and when that OLD NICOTINE ADDICT craves to SUCK ON A DEATH STICK- I just grab a lemon bit into that LEMON - when I got a text - MY Ma was being put into HOSPICE to be made comfortable to die - I was NICOTINE FREE FOR YEARS - MY OLD MINDSET was dead YET - MY EMOTIONS ALL MIXED UP were NOT DEAD - ALL MY childhood evils returned - ALL the sins of OLD PAST feelings and MY twisted persepctive came RUSHING in ALL AT ONCE - CRAZY FEELING THINKING and I was so over whelmed by THE OLD LITTLE ADDICT GIRL - who picked up cigarette butts off the street for her grandma and smoked some of those cigarette butts at age FOUR - I cried OUT to MY Higher Power - WHO IS GOD - and I bit into that lemon peel and all - STILL NICOTINE FREE and MY ma is STILL dying SIX months later in HOSPICE and I come here EVERYDAY -  because I do NOT want to SUCK ON DEATH and  - I want to enjoy MY day TODAY and LIVE filled with JOY and LOVE and PEACE - so I DO what I was taught - get a NEW MINDSET

I blog BEFORE - I use MY Ma dying as an EXCUSE - to suck on death - I am responsible for MY emotions that TRY to lead ME to self pity and I TRY to be of service to EVERYBODY in MY Lord Jesus name amen


Please I am m talking about ME not YOU or anybody and I am very thankful to MY Daddy God for this NEW day and EVERYBODY here

MY ma called ME - she said I been looking for your number and I found YOU - I love YOU and I want YOU to tell Diane to call ME - I said I love YOU MA and she said - YOUR the only one who always answers the phone - I said crying - I love YOU MA  and she said alright I love you to bye and I cried bye ma - this time I did NOT bite into a lemon - I just let MYSELF cry and willing accepted DEATH is NEAREE and coming for MY ma soon - thanks for letting ME share