I haven't been coming to EX as often as I used to and it's for a lot of reasons, but I need to say pfffft to those reasons and come on back. I've had way too many urges, strong urges!, and smoking dreams lately and I wonder if part of it is that I'm not as obsessive about my quit as I was?
For that very reason, I figure I need to keep reading here (daily!) and posting here (probably not as much as I used to) to keep my head in the quit smoking game. I do not smoke and do not want to weaken to the point where I lose my resolve. That ain't happening. I live with a sister who has COPD and a husband who quit 20 years ago and still has his last pack (he's amazingly strong and says he has to keep it to prove to himself that he's truly quit). I see the ravages of smoking every single time I brush my teeth and go for more dental implant surgery. And I just don't smoke.
Now to get these stupid urges and dreams out of my life. I know it will still take some time and that they will pop up whether I want them to or not, but I'm so done with quitting. I want to be quit, kaput, over it and have that be my new habit.
Even though we know it's not the right or smart thing to do and would be contrary to all our hard work, but do any of you ever just wish you could have just one, on the deck with a cup of coffee, watching the birds, hanging out in the sun? Of course, just one would get me dizzy, so I'd have to have another one to really enjoy it and oh, wait, that was so good that I'll have another, and just like that, my brain changes and turns them into something I want instead of something I abhor. Argh. Rhetorical question.
Donna
Day 224
Hi Donna...glad you are back at Ex’s...I am so sorry you are having smoking dreams and all kinds of urges...I really don’t think about the “one” anymore...but it is not to say a thought may pop in my head here and there, but I am reminded of NMW NOPE....Notice your thought comes when you are relaxing...you need figure out how to put that trigger to bed...and find another thought when drinking your coffee and looking at the birds, perhaps your book, your bible, some new items that will replace that “just one”... glad you are back...Happy Monday hon ~ Colleen 238 DOF