Hi everyone. Feels likes it's been awhile since I've popped in. I'm sitting here reading over my quit journal from before my day 1 and up until now (Day 45), and it seems surreal that I don't smoke anymore. I guess I expected something magical to suddenly happen. For my life to suddenly be amazing.
Well, I will say that the magic has been much slower and subtler.
Here's some of the magic I've experienced:
- very few cravings for cigarettes now. I often go entire days without one. The intensity of needing to get energy out, to escape, to find comfort, panic and anxiety and restlessness, etc...are still there, but are no longer coupled with smoking.
- I'm going to exercise classes regularly and am having a lot of fun doing that and find them so helpful for my mental health
- I've survived many many many panic attacks and loads of discomfort and HAVEN'T smoked. I've found other, more healthy and way more helpful supports. These are becoming more of a habit now and easier to access.
- There is so much more time in a day now!
- I have felt joy and excitement for life.
- I have felt peace
- My desire to live has outweighed my desire to smoke
- I am no longer utterly depressed as I was when I first quit...thinking there was nothing left to live for
- I have done soooooo many thing without smoking...that I thought were impossible without smoking first.
- I am feeling stronger and more confident. It's up a down, but the general trend is up.
- I find the smell of cigarettes disgusting
- I'm starting to love myself
- Im finding things I enjoy doing
I've promised myself to get through No Mans Land without smoking....so the decision is off the table right now. That's day 130. Its just not an option right now. That's helped alot.
Thank you for all your support!!