Stop and

Blog Post created by indingrl.01.06.2011 on Oct 27, 2018

TODAY I stop to pray and then I stop and thank God for God-MY REALITY-FACT-NOT FEELINGS-which come and go and are fickle-YET-I AM RESPONSIBLE FOR MINE! Please take what HELPS and let go of the rest-to be HELPFUL-is MY only aim-thank-please I am talking about ME not anyone else-TODAY is MY new day-YET-I am stuck by MY OWN CHOICE-in 2016 MY ADULT daughter CHOOSE of her own free will to use alcohol to drown out life-end result her CONSEQUENCE of that CHOICE of hers-cirohsis of her liver-2016 to 2018-this LIVER DISEASE is at the stage-dr said get on transplant list-quit alcohol-will you do whatever transplant dr says to do-she gave no answer-in 15 days she and I have been in ER room for dr to drain fluid out of her abdomen area and yesterday her right lung-she couldnt breathe-YET-she is using newport death sticks to cope-ONLY HALF A PACK-its her life-her free will choice-MY problem is I aint gonna use MY DRUG OF CHOICE-MARLBORO RED NICOTINE-because MY Lord Jesus doesnt use-please remember talking about ME-I am praying to be willing to accept and honor her free will CHOICE and to live MY OWN LIFE-when the dr was asking her the question-will you do what the liver dr asks-I SAID YES TO THE DR-OUT LOUD-he looked at ME with eyes saying I am talking to her-and the dr asked her again-she gave no answer-so the dr said your liver is 133 years old-your too young to have such a sick liver-they drained her right lung and released her-she used her death stick to cope-BUT FOR THE GRACE OF GOD GO I-I stop and pray-dear Jesus dont let her suffer-HEAL HER QUICKLY OR TAKE HER QUICKLY-in MY mom HEART I am selfish and self centered as I watched her slowly dieing from the 5 stages of liver disease-I STOP-I BLOG-BEFORE I GIVE UP-I ASK MYSELF-WHO has the liver disease? I STOP and remember MY GOD will supply all I need just for TODAY-for ME to share MY life as a living one day at a time and NEVER TAKE ANOTHER PUFF OVER ME OR USE MY DAUGHTER CHOICES AS AN EXCUSE-HER LIFE IS NONE OF MY BUSINESS! TODAY I STOP-I thank all who take the time to read in MY need for SOME ONE TO KNOW USING NICOTINE TO COPE ONLY PRODUCES DEATH-and for ME-I chose to share MY broken heart - letting love lead ME here where a RECOVERING NICOTINE ADDICT IS LOVED AND FAMILY WELCOMES ME JUST AS I AM-RAW-REAL-FACT FACING REALITY-THATS LIFE DEAL WITH IT-SINAO-NOPE-NEVER TAKE ANOTHER PUFF OVER ME EVER!