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Share your quitting journey

The Test Drive

crazymama_Lori
0 2 57

Okay.  You're about 2 1/2 to 3 months into your quit.  You're feeling mighty confident.  You might still be going through some emotional up and downs, but not as bad as they were when you first started this.  You're starting to notice that the wheezing has gone away.  Some have more stamina.  Some complain of still being tired.  Some have noticed that their concentration has finally returned.  That fuzzy head feeling has gone away. You're feeling pretty confident these days.

You notice that you can be around smokers now.  It doesn't bother you as much as you thought it would.  Anticipation of the event far outweighs the reality.  You're reaching into the 6-month mark now and feeling even better.  I'm liking this whole new non-smoking thing going on.  You've learned a lot about yourself over these past few months.  Learned about what kicks up that craving or what I like to call a strong urge to just pick one up and give it a test.  I've gone this long.  A couple hits or drags isn't going to hurt.  I've gone this long.  Come on, it ain't going to hurt you.

That's what I call the test drive.  The uncontrollable urge to just see if it stuck or not.  If truly this time was the last time.  I won't go back to a pack again.  I don't want to go back through all that again.  Or it might take another twist of nobody listens to me.  Nobody includes me in anything anymore.  Why do I even bother?  STOP.  Isn't that what got you here in the first place?  Didn't you have this conversation with yourself many, many times before?  What did you use the last time when you went back to smoking?  What was your excuse that time?

The physical hold of this whole nicotine dependence is a piece of cake compared to the psychological hold it has.  How we used the cloak of smoke to envelope our deepest darkest emotions.  How it swirled around them and made them seem bearable at the time.  Take this time to learn how to love yourself once again, become comfortable with yourself again, truly believe that you have the power and the skills to cope with life again.  Smoking is not your answer, nor is it the question.  Smoking is just a word.  It's no longer an action to you anymore....... believe that.

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About the Author
Never be afraid or embarrassed about your "smoking thoughts" while quitting, they're there to remind us how strong we truly can be. Always remember, you will always WANT to smoke, but you have to CHOOSE not to. We can't break the ties that bind us without first changing the cycle that created it.