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2016
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Day 40

Posted by vanlil Jul 28, 2016

Can't believe 40 days from my surrender.  Feeling fantastic - now I am trying and trying to relearn my thinking pattern.  No more reward cigarettes for whatever reasons.  ex: housecleaning, concert work etc.

Found that I just enjoy sitting and looking out the window and get a feeling of contentment. Works most of the time -NOT ALL OF THE TIME - Learning that I can feel contented with being comfortable in my own skin.

Lillian

vanlil

Day 38 tomorrow-1

Posted by vanlil Jul 26, 2016

Holy Cow - noticed that I have rosy cheeks without using make up.  I thought I don't remmbr putting blush on today..................Wow - they are natural rosy cheeks.

Have smoke for 63 yrs. and ALWAYS used rouge for color. (called blush on now) I am thrilled and grateful.Any sign of  getting healed from that cigarette crap.

Can you imagine - age 80 and not needing rouge and dousing myself with cologne to TRY to look like a non-smoker?  INSANE.............BUT I AM BEING RESTORED TO SANITY!!!!

For this I am GRATEFUL.

Lillian

vanlil

Day 38 tomorrow

Posted by vanlil Jul 26, 2016

Holy Cow - noticed that I have rosy cheeks without using make up.  I thought I don't remmbr putting blush on today..................Wow - they are natural rosy cheeks.

Have smoke for 63 yrs. and ALWAYS used rouge for color. (called blush on now) I am thrilled and grateful.Any sign of  getting healed from that cigarette crap.

Can you imagine - age 80 and not needing rouge and dousing myself with cologne to TRY to look like a non-smoker?  INSANE.............BUT I AM BEING RESTORED TO SANITY!!!!

For this I am GRATEFUL.

Lillian

To comment go to my other thread.

vanlil

Day 33

Posted by vanlil Jul 21, 2016

Things are going ok...............some craves but doable.  Think of smoking less and less.  Enjoying being out a lot more.  I was a closet smoker - so I wanted to be home so I could smoke all I wanted.  The last few months I was becoming a chain smoker.  Tough because I smoke out on the screened porch and here in Key West it is hot as blazes.  I was outside more than inside.  

My voice is loud and clear considering I just about lost it completely .  For this I am so grateful. This time I quit for MYSELF.  NOt  for other people or what society thinks.

vanlil

One Month tomorrow (Sat)

Posted by vanlil Jul 15, 2016

The month just flew by............I know I couldn't have done it alone................I am so grateful to all of my new friends who shared with me and kept me encourged.

I am still on Nicorettes and I will follow their instructions.  After 63 yrs. of smoking I feel it really helped me.  I am grateful for that too.

I have my voice back (completely lost it and I wa so sure I would be one of those people who have that artificial voicebox contraption.  LOUD AND CLEAR.

My tongue is not coated anymore and I don't get those horrible nightly leg cramps.  Haven't gained any weight and my face is so much brighter, too.

I use to use a lot of cologne because I just knew I had to be stinky.............I only spray myself after dressing in the morning and that is it!!!!!

My house smells good too.  Even though I rarely smoked indoors I know I carried the stink in on my clothes.  OMG - the car is fresh too.  GRATITUDE AGAIN.

Thank you all who have kept in touch with me.    YUP - more Gratitudes.

vanlil

21 days and happy

Posted by vanlil Jul 9, 2016

Can't believe 21 days have passed smoke free.

Not easy but doable............I can talk, yell and sleep.  My voice is back in full force.

My sleeping fantastic with NO leg cramps.

Boredom is still my enemy................these hot,humid days have to be treated like a "blizzard" if I lived up North.

Been reading other members blogs - and I am so GRATEFUL.  I don't know how people can stay QUIT with turmoil and enormous problems going on in their lives.  SO I THINK MY BOREDOM IS JUST ANOTHER EXCUSE!!!!   Shame on me and my pity pot.

vanlil

vanlil - 3 weeks tomorrow

Posted by vanlil Jul 8, 2016

YEAH............3 weeks tomorrow.

More ups than downs..............and the downs do not last long.  

For this I am so GRATEFUL.

vanlil

vanlil - Lillian

Posted by vanlil Jul 6, 2016

Tomorrow 19 days.............yeah

19 days ago I had NO voice..............I teach Pilate's and I couldn't give the instructions, count outs or converse with my clients.  

Today - I have my voice back and my class also heard me LOUD AND CLEAR.................Oh I am so grateful.

It actually had been getting more and more difficult to speak loudly for quite awhile.  Then NO VOICE - 

This HAD TO HAPPEN TO ME - because I never felt impeded by smoking.  No breathing problems or other physical problems to cause me discomfort.  EXCEPT FOR THE NIGHTLY LEG CRAMPS FOR YEARS - I never thought of cigarettes doing that.   OH YEAH - NO MORE LEG CRAMPS EITHER.

So - I AM GRATEFUL for losing my voice and so GRATEFUL to have it back.  Scared the heck out of me because I was sure it was the big  "C."

If I get a crave - I just give a LOUD YELL and YEAH I can do it.

vanlil

Day 16

Posted by vanlil Jul 4, 2016

Really had a wonderful B/day yesterday.............flowers, food and many cards............Today I am having a "let down" I think.  Craving for the last hour........going to do some more reading to educate myself more about smoking/non-smoking.

Looking forward to the fireworks tonight though.

vanlil

about me

Posted by vanlil Jul 2, 2016

I was told to write more about me.  Don't know where to put it.

I see a line on "my page" that says about me..............but when I click it nthing happens.

Lillian

vanlil

Tomorrow 2 weeks

Posted by vanlil Jul 1, 2016

YEAH YEAH YEAH

2 weeks tomorrow July 2nd.  Feeling good - voice is back and stronger. Usually in the afternoon I get a huge urge to smoke.  Didn't happen today.

I will continue to remember my gratitudes in my life.  Especially surendering to smoking that I did for 63 yrs. Oh yes tried to quit but couldn't stay quit.  I was doing the quitting for other people NOT FOR ME.

This time it is ONLY for me.  Tired of feeling like a smoky  croaky dingy lady.

vanlil

13 days of smelling good

Posted by vanlil Jul 1, 2016

These 13 days just flew by.  Finding out lots of stuff about me................Boy I sure stubborn  63 yrs. of smoking and so many quits that didn't work.  Thrilled to find out my shortcomings without hating myself.