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Share your quitting journey

Strange life at times!

smorgy8513
Member
0 11 7

I have been struggling alot with sleep.    I have a sleep disorder plus every couple of years the iron drains out of my body and I have to go get infusions of iron.   One of the signs of that is being tired/exhausted all the time no matter how much sleep I get.     Think it is time for me to have that checked again.

I hate that i'm tired all the time.    I got 5 hours of sleep on Sat night, got up/showered/dressed/did blog and was ready for church.     Felt so exhausted that I had to lay down and then slept another hour, missing church.    So, got up and read the paper, made grocery list and then had to sleep another 1.5 hours.     Went to grocery store, talked to friend on phone and then slept for another hour.      Pushed myself to stay up until 10 pm and then went to bed.....got almost 7 hours of sleep last night.      

I know this is all boring....but just sayin that sleep and exhaustion is taking a toll on me.     I know it isn't about smoking....heavens, how would that help me?     No, it wouldn't.      And I don't think that 161 days into my quit would still have the sleep disturbance be such a big factor.      So, got to go to have blood tested for iron, get appt with sleep dr to find out about changing meds!

today starts my day of healthy eating and moving.    I''m hoping losing some weight, being more active will give me more energy.......either that or I'll be sleeping throughout the day at 1 hour increments every 3 hours!      Not really!

What's a girl to do?

Down side of this is that I haven't been able to be as active on the site......I read and I blog some but not having the energy to do alot of reaching out.         Hope my friends understand that I will be back.....I'll come here everyday, just won't do as much reaching out.      Know that I still love all of you!

So, I have 161 days of Freedom!      My next goal is 6 months which will be on 2/5/14!!!    Not so far away!

Sharon

11 Comments
About the Author
Gone but Not Forgotten. RIP I've thought so many times about quitting, done a few quits with the longest being 9 months. Blamed that relapse on my sister because she broke her hip. This time I feel different 8/5/13:The first day of my forever quit. About me? Well, I'm old enough that I am going to semi-retire (work 2 days per week) starting in October, 2013. I have 2 grown sons, 2 older sisters, 2 cats. I'm passionate about my work, love mystery books. I give all the glory for my work, any successes I may have to God and prayer. I have a lot of people praying for me right now and that is where I feel the strength. I also am finding strength, information and support from this site. I hope I can offer some of that to others when I get past the newbie stage. 9/4/13 30 days today!! I've learned so much since I've been coming here each morning (and sometimes at night). Words: choose, not try-----decision----not giving anything up, but gaining---I'm worth so much more than a cigarette. These are only a few of the pearls of wisdom that I've taken to heart. So many great people. I learn something each and every time I come on here. I'm learning about myself too. I teach clients everyday that feelings are feelings and ok to have, but I've always fought that concept myself. I heard when I was little "what have you got to cry about?" so I learned not to cry. If anger was shown it meant going back and shutting the door 10 times quietly or maybe getting the wrath of my parent. So, I learned not to cry, not to feel anger. I'm learning now that I have those feelings and that smoking pushed them aside and down. They are there and real. Now I'm trying to learn how to show and express them instead of going off by myself for a smoke. I have supporters. The biggest pride is what I feel in myself. With each day I wake up I can say "Today is day ____" and I feel proud. Not the kind of pride like I could never fail. That is a realization and why I need to be aware and conscious each moment. No, smoking doesn't solve anything. And today I am proof that I can go on without the crutch of a cigarette! 8/5/17 4 Years Quit!!! Who would have "thunk" it? I never took responsibility for my relapses, always blamed whatever it was that occurred. So, when I quit on 8/5/13 I knew I REALLY wanted it to work, knew that I needed as much support as I could get but I think deep down I was afraid this one wouldn't take either. So, I did as much positive as I could: Chantix, prayer, atomic fire balls, telling friends AND coming to the EX many times throughout the day. The people here became my friends as well as my family. I could share when I was struggling and get encouragement. Have there been struggles in my life since then that would have "caused" me to smoke in the past? Of course! Life goes on and troubles happen even when you don't smoke. I lost my sister who was also my best friend, my diagnosis of lung cancer and the treatment that has gone on since then (dr tells me "not curable, but treatable"). Would smoking make any of those things better? OF COURSE NOT! But when you're an addict the brain tells tons of lies to you..... Newbies: use the resources that the EX provides to you and you will have major milestones too. I thank my family here and love each and every one of you that have helped me! Too many names to mention.