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It is OK to...... whatever!

Posted by pir8fan Dec 31, 2010

In less than 24 hours I will have my first year behind me! I do not think I have pissed anyone off lately, so I am going to drag out my soap box!

There are people who tell you about how they quit and lived happily ever after! Good for them! I have reached for that goal! It is not for everybody! Some folks can be happy just by saying they are! That is not everybody! I am a very good salesman, BUT I can't sell that! You may not all be able to make yourself happy just by saying you are! If that were possible we would not need this site!

Some people will tell you that they just laughed their cravings away! And maybe some of you can! I sure could not! Most folks do not find humor in their own brains trying to convince them to destroy themselves!

I have questioned the chemicals in cigarettes! I wondered here at the site if they were keeping me alive! I proclaimed with some certainty that they were keeping me sane! That is probably more in question tonight than ever before!

The point that I am trying to make people, is that this is not some walk in the park! If you are struggling, that is OK and it is normal! Just because you are not happy does not mean you are doing it wrong! If you wake up and are affraid to open your eyes because you might be in jail, that is OK! As long as you are not! It is OK to rant and rave and be unhappy! You are breaking an addiction, not graduating from Charm School! You are fighting for your very life. That is not always pretty! But it is a fight you can win! Learn from the mistakes of others ! You do not have a long enough life to make them all yourself! There are lots of people here who will help you! Use us! The one thing I am absolutely certain about is this! No one cares how much you know until they know how much you care! I care about everyone of you who are seeking freedom! I will drive the train at this railroad to freedom. All aboard!! And bring your extra baggage! We will help you sort it out!         Tommy


The 5's

Posted by pir8fan Dec 28, 2010

Yesterday was a day of 5's! The number really showed up in my life! I woke up 5 days away from one year quit! Yesterday was # 5 in a string of very bad days for me! At some point I realized that I was 5 miles from my old cigarette store. 5 dollars from a fresh pack of smokes and 5 minutes from throwing away every bit of self respect I had earned. And 5 minutes from losing the respect of my friends here.

Today is a day of 4's! I am 4 days from one year quit! I am greatfull 4 that! I am 4 ever in the debt of my friends here! I am 4 ever determined to be smoke free. I am trying to 4 give myself 4 almost losing focus! And I am here 4 you 4 ever if you have a bad day!

Thank you all for supporting me! Even when you don't know you are doing anything!                         Tommy


200 days the IRISH way!

Posted by pir8fan Dec 27, 2010

Anyone want to have a party??? We should!! In case you did not notice our Irish Rose has 200 smoke free days behind her!! Party time!! Please join me in congatulating this wonderful Lady on this huge milestone! Way to go Irish! Let the party begin, as we give thanks for people like this who are a part of our community!


Today is Christmas!

Posted by pir8fan Dec 25, 2010

Today is Christmas and whether you celebrate this day or not, it is a day when we all stop for a minute! We focus on what is important! If we have family we are greatful! If we are loved by anyone we are greatful! If we have survived tragedy we are(or should be) greatful.

We also look back at what we could have done differently! Most of us wish we had never put that first cigarette in our mouths! We can not do anything about that now! It is history and perhaps a tragedy that we have survived. So far!

Now that we have looked to the past, let us turn our heads forward! It has been said that blame is pointless. Everyone made the only choice they were capable of making at the time, based on the facts as they knew them! If we made bad choices based on the wrong facts, so be it. Let us not spend our lives looking in the rear view mirror! Let us look down the road with a clear vision. We understand the facts better now! Everything we did in the past, has gone into making us who we are today! Let us take pride in the lessons learned the hard way! Let us put them to work making us better people today! Among the things we have learned is that we can live Smoke Free! Let us do that from this moment forward, for whatever time we have left here! Let us pass on this lesson to others.  No one has time to make all the mistakes for themselves! Look forward my friends, to a future that can be as bright as we make it. But, glance occassionally at that rearview mirror so you don't forget where you have been!

I am always                Tommy

I have been here for almost a year! I have met some wonderful people! I have met some forgettable people as well! The good far outweighs the not so good! Good, Bad, or Indifferent, you have all given me an opportunity to share in the "Collateral Kindness" that is found here! I do not want to start naming names here for fear of leaving someone out! Plus I would be typing all day! So by catagory:

The Veterans! Thank you for blazing the trail and putting down the tracks that the rest of us are trying to follow!

The Serial Quitters! Thank you for showing us the ability to never give up on ourselves! Know that we will never give up on you either!

The Cheerleaders! Thank you! You are the first responders! You are the ones who pick everyone up at their lowest point! You always know what to say and who needs to hear it! God Bless you everyone!

The Professors! Thank you! You are the people who have vast storehouses of knowledge about out addictions! You are so well versed that you know immediately where to find the answers to every problem!

The Martyrs! Thank you! You are the folks for whom everything is harder! You give us the opportunity to understand that our path is not so hard after all! 

And then comes The Quitters! You come here firm in in you resolve! You occasionally need some of the comfort that "Collateral Kindness provides! You make a commitment to quit and you honor it! Everyday you show us your character and become our heros and sheros! Thank you for showing us your integrity!

Last and by far not least, there was Sheri! No matter how you felt about her she was the Head Cheerleader! No one ever touched so many hearts and souls in so short a period of time! If you are out ther reading this, Thank you Sheri!

And thank all of you, for making this period of my life so memorable! I wish you all a Very, Very Merry Christmas, and I hope that the coming year brings each of you more happiness, more love,better health, more wealth, and more time to enjoy it all!   Live FREE!    SMOKE FREE!!     I am just   Tommy!


The Smokey Ghost!

Posted by pir8fan Dec 22, 2010

Christmas is upon us! A season of gifts, and decorations and worship!  A season of peace and good will. It is a time of refection as well! Many of us look back to the quits of Christmas past! A lot of us look at the quit of Christmas present! Some are looking forward, to the quit of Christmas future The common thread to all of these efforts is love! Your quit is inspired by your love of yourself, or your love of others! And it does not matter which! If you have a love of yourself, maintain your quit for that reason! If you have a love for others then that should drive your quit! If you are fortunate enough to be loved, then never disrespect those extremely important people by putting something as horrible as an addiction above them! Stay quit for yourself! Stay quit for the ones you love! Stay quit for those who love you! I wish you all a joyous Christmas! Now go forward..... and prosper!!!!           Tommy


Benjamin Franklin!

Posted by pir8fan Dec 20, 2010

In the sales business there is a famous close called the Ben Franklin! It goes like this: Ben Franklin was a very wise man and one of the founding fathers of this great country! His wisdom is legendary! He had a very unique decision maklng process, and I would like to share it with you! When old Ben had an important decision to make he would take a piece of paper and draw a line straight down the middle. On one side he would list reasons for deciding one way, On the other side he would list reasons for going the other way! When he finished he had a very clear understanding of the pros and cons! With this clear understanding came a clear answer! This has worked many years for many people and it will work for you!

If you are questioning your quit, or even if you should begin a quit, try this. Ben Franklin your decision! On one side of a piece of paper list all the benefits of breaking your addiction. On the other side list any sane reason to continue smoking! (good luck finding one) Keep your list with you! If you feel the urge to smoke, look at your list! Make the wise choice! Close the door on smoking. Forever! Who knows, one day your wisdom may be a legend among your family and friends!         Tommy


T'is the week

Posted by pir8fan Dec 18, 2010

T'is the week before Christmas and all over the site,

New members keep coming, a very welcome sight!

The veterans stop in, offering everyone lifts,

Between their errands, to go out and buy gifts!

We all think of the triggers the season will bring.

And we remember the reasons we gave up that Thing!

The stench, the coughing, and the gasping for air,

Are now distant memories, we have happiness to share!

Let us all keep our FOCUS, not lose DETERMINATION,

MERRY CHRISTMAS fellow Exer's, and my Congratulation!

Tommy Piver


How about 100 days for Judy!!!

Posted by pir8fan Dec 17, 2010

It is true! Judy who came here as ? but quickly discovered she was really an ! has been with us for 100 days! I know that everyone is busy this time of year, but please stop for a moment and and join me in saluting this fine Lady, who has reached this fantastic milestone! Congrats to all the milestones, large or small, today! And a special pat on the back for our Judy!


Today is the day!

Posted by pir8fan Dec 14, 2010

I know there are a lot of people out there who preparing to quit! Some of you are commenting here and some of you are just lurking and reading and learning what works for some of us! My guess is that a good number of you are looking toward New Years Eve as a quit date. Great! Start the new year with a renewed effort to improve your life!

I do not think this is the best plan! Has anyone ever started a year with grand plans before? How did that work for you? A lot of folks make "New Years Resolutions" with the idea that they will try to do better! In the back of their minds they know that they will only succeed for a limited time! These resolutions are usually something we try! Quitting should not be something you TRY to do! Do it!!! Do it today! By New Years you will have a couple of weeks under your belt and can draw strength from helping the folks that do wait! I looked, last year, at a large number of people who quit as a "resolution". I am not seeing many of them today! We make these resolutions with the expectation that they will be broken! There are not many thing sadder than a broken quit! Set yourself up for success! Quit now! You can do it!! We will help!!!            Tommy


Tis the season!

Posted by pir8fan Dec 11, 2010

Two weeks from today we Christians will celebrate the birth of our Savior! The Jews among us have just completed their celebration of Hanukkah! The trees are being decorated and the Menorahs have been lighted! It is a time of celebration! As we pass out gifts and join family and friends for this holiday season, let us all be safe! As we pay respect to the ones that we love, let us remember to respect ourselves! There will be parties galore and many will raise a toast. For some it will be their first encounter with alcohol since their quits began! Do not allow "Demon Rum" to steal your quit! It is a time of year when many will feel good about all they have done for others! As we enjoy the reward of appreciation from those who care about us, we must not allow ourselves to think of "just one cigarette" as a reward. It is no more of a reward than "just one bullet to the brain" would be!

Be proud this holiday season not only of the gifts you have given others, but also of the gift you have given yourself! The gift you have given to all of us is a longer a better life for yourself! This season, as I ask to be forgiven for my trespasses, extend forgivness to those who have trespassed againt me, I would like to thank all of you who given me the gift of friendship! And thank you for helping me overcome the nicodemon! I wish for all a very Merry Christmas! Whether you celebrate it or not! Celebrate yourself and your new "Start" on life. You matter!



Altitude of the attitudes!

Posted by pir8fan Dec 9, 2010

I have been around for a while now, and I have never seen higher expectations. I just want to comment on all the really good attitudes I am seeing here! I do not know if it is the season, or people whisteling in the graveyard! What I do know is that I am seeing an incredible amount of determination and optimism in the blogs here! Good for you!! If you are not sharing in this happiness, please come aboard! Share the experience. Revel in the freedom that your co-exers are enjoying! Walking away from this addiction is a great thing! Celebrate the new lease on life this opportunity presents! Keep pouring out the positives people! You are helping yourselves by helping others! I hope everyone here has as good of a day as I am determined to have!!


KathyS passed 300!

Posted by pir8fan Dec 4, 2010

And I failed to make you all aware of it! Please join me in a heartfelt show of respect for Kathy!   WAY TO GO KATHY!!

Next up ONE YEAR!!


Pray for Dawn please!!

Posted by pir8fan Dec 3, 2010

I just spoke with Dawn! She is in the hospital and the news is not good! There are no details that I can divulge at this point, but would like to ask all of you to send up prayers for her! We have all seen what prayer can do when we all come together with it! Thank you in advance for you participation!!

Danger! Danger! Danger!

Spring has sprung, and Fall has fell!

Winter is here and it is cold as........................Usual!

Seriously, I know it is not actually winter solstice yet, but cold weather is spreading across the nation! Ever here in South Florida we did not reach 70 degrees yesterday! We all know that sunlight is a good thing! Winter brings depression because the days are shorter, the weather is worse, and we do not take advantage of the sunlight that we do get! So, my reminder to you is slow down. Beware of  the potential for problems! Find your vitamin C! Do not let depression, at any level, sneak up on you! Do not let attitude steal your quit! Share your feelings and be happy! Be healthy(physically and mentally)! Protect your quit! Protect your sanity! Protect your life!


I see a lot.......

Posted by pir8fan Nov 30, 2010

........ of people having a hard time today, so I am going to repost my blog from Nov.22ond! I hope you all find your help here!


Today a blog spoke of the dangers that face people in the 30-100 day range! These dangers are real! The people who seem to do the best during this period are the ones I see subscribing to my theory of "Collateral Kindness" New people here go through a very real period of romance with their new quits! I remember it! I also know when it ended and I was asking questions like: "OK where is my reward? I have done good! What is in this for me? Do I get one cigarette now?"

Your reward is on its way! Mean while you have to protect your quit! The way you do that is "Collateral Kindness"! It is time to look to the newbies! You are their heroes! I have 325 days and a lot of people have more! New people do not relate to me! They may respect me, but they do not relate! They are trying to get through hell week! Their focus is the next few days and weeks, not the next few months! They are looking to you for help and guidance! You are the ones who have most recently been where they are! Look back! Help these new quitters get through what you have just made it through! I can remember what they are going through, but they don't know that I can! They see me as too far removed from the begining! They see you as the heroes that can offer them the most help! And you can!

Guess what? When you get caught up in this process you also help yourselves! You are reminded on a daily basis of what you went through! You are reminded of why you quit! And you remember how important it is to protect that quit! You help yourself by helping others! "Collateral Kindness"!!! It works everytime it is tried! Use your ability to help others in order to help yourself! What a great concept for quitting! What a great concept for living!    I am Tommy Piver, and I wish you well!

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