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Share your quitting journey

Defeat ????

OldBones-Larry
4 11 99

I climbed over the edge of the Depression Gorge a few minutes ago.

It was a long climb up with many falls back down to the bottom. A voice kept whispering that I should just give in and stay at the bottom.

I think you know that I couldn't do that.

I am looking across the desert to get my bearings and will begin the journey back to the mountain soon.

I am still not "cured" as a lot of people think I should be.

Depression is like addiction in many ways. It is a thing that can come back to bother you again and again. 

Though I can honestly say that all my addictions are in my past, I still stay vigilant against them.

Depression is the same, though not as easy to guard against.

I have battled with this for many years and have been so far down that I was ready to give up many times.

I always found the strength to fight my way back up from the depths though. I never took that final step that the inner demons were so wanting me to take.

I will continue the fight this time as I always have before.

I will get back to the mountain and mount another caravan across the desert of NML as I vowed to The Old Goat that I would do.

Travel strong my fellow trekkers.

One step, and then another, will get you to where you want to be.

Larry the Caravan Master

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About the Author
I am a male that underwent coronary artery bypass X3 (triple) on 10/22/13 at the age of 55. I was living on about 20-30% of one coronary artery and my left heart output was only 20% to 25%. I spent a week in the hospital after surgery and went home. Then had to go back a day later for another week because I had pneumonia. Finally a few days because of a slight arythmia. All told it has been about 2 1/2 weeks. I am past the cravings by now and only have the urges to contend with. I really don't suggest that anyone quits smoking using this technique though. I'll have to carry the scars from that day for the rest of my life. The large one down the center of my chest, and the ones from several "silent" infarctions. I came that close to the next world. Never again will I subject my body to that (at one point in my life I was smoking 5 packs of cigarillos a day). I now have to say N.O.P.E. (Not One Puff Ever) every day of my life. TheOldGoat-Joan, I miss you terribly my friend. Elder Lists Guilia's: (/blogs/Giulia-blog/2017/06/18/elders-list-ao-december-7-2016 ) or Smorgy's (Chronological Elder List)