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Posted by OldBones-Larry Apr 14, 2019

It is so amazing what can be done with support!!

Let me explain just a little....

2000 days ago I was somewhere between living and the Ancestor Lands. I remained that way for ten hours.

The next three days are totally lost to me. I was in a drug induced coma as I began the long road to recovery from heart surgery. 

It also began my personal journey to freedom from sickorettes....

I had to endure pain, uncertainty, depression, elation, and many other things. 

I had good days. I had bad days.

I made my journey and succeeded in quitting.

I had terrific support here and valued it all. 

I now wish to tell those beginning their journey to lean on the support from people here. Listen to what they have to tell you.

Read their old blogs and pick out the things that you find helpful.

We encourage "snooping" through our old blogs. 

Without the help, support, and friendships I found here I would not be able to say that I am 2000 days free from nicotine.

I thank those that helped so much on this journey and urge those just starting to also lean on the support you will find here.

One step, and then another, will get you to where you want to be.



Back Home

Posted by OldBones-Larry Apr 11, 2019

The Elders have let me return back to my home.

I have spent many hours over the days seeking the Ancient Ones and seeking to center my Spirit.

My Spiral was very far out of balance.

I spent days in meditation and seeking the center of all things where I might find my center once more.

With much help and and seeking, I have returned to my center self.

I must now continue to meditate and seek the advice of the Ancient Ones and the Elders that have been before.

I will return to the Caravan as soon as I can.

Stay strong in your journey my friends.

One step, and then another, will get you to where you need to be.

Larry (Soaring Eagle)


Out of Touch

Posted by OldBones-Larry Mar 23, 2019

I will be out of touch for a few days as I seek out the elders to assist me in finding my path once more.

I will be leaving very early tomorrow morning and returning to my birth lands to seek them out. 

I have done all I can to center myself without aid. I must now turn to the old ceremonies and helpers and I must have others close that can help me return from the other side.

I am unable to say how many days the ceremonies will take, but, I will return as soon as I can.

I ask that you send special words to Creator that He will assist me and grant me this.

Stay strong in your journey my friends as I try to stay strong in this one.

One step, and then another, will get you to where you want to be.



Resting at the Oasis

Posted by OldBones-Larry Mar 18, 2019

After walking for many nights, I finally came to an oasis where the waterhole was not dry. I am going to rest here for a few days to regain my strength. I must also regain the will to go on. I have had to force myself to keep traveling several times.

 I have still not caught sight of the mountain. I can only hope that I am not walking in circles or that I am not on the wrong course. 

Maybe I wandered farther away while I was in Depression Gorge that I thought I had.

I must quit thinking things like that and stay strong. 

I WILL find the mountain and get there safely.

You all must stay strong in your journey across NML. There are many things out here that could harm you. 

Ol' Nic and his bunch will never give up on trying to lure you back into his poisonous clutches.

Keep a sharp eye out for his traps and watch out for his minions.

One step, and then another, will get you to where you want to be.

Larry the Caravan Master


Still Walking

Posted by OldBones-Larry Mar 10, 2019

I have been traveling for two nights now. I can avoid the heat of the day by doing so.

I walk till about an hour before dawn, then find a place to shelter for the day.

Unfortunately, The oasis are few and far between in this area of the desert. I hope to reach one soon so I can replenish the moisture in my body and rest for a day or so.

I cannot see the mountain yet, so I must navigate by the stars.

I will begin my journey again in a few minutes and walk all night. 

In the morning, I will once again use my robe to make a shelter to ward off the sun and seek rest.

You must stay strong to make your journey across this desert my friends. When you come to an oasis, stop and rest. Replenish your supplies from the store caches that have been left there for you. Refill all your waterskins with fresh water before you leave to continue your journey.

I invite all the new travelers to read the old blogs of those that have gone before you. 

Gain strength and knowledge from their journeys.

Mine are all open to you for reading anytime.

They are under the tag nml_caravan so you can find them easily.

Travel safely friends and keep a sharp eye for Nic and his gang. You never know where they will have set a trap for you.

I once more pass on the words of that wise Old Goat ....

Keep them away from your face! You can't smoke them that way!

Take it one second, one minute, one hour, one day at a time if that is what you need to do.

Remember ....

One step, and then another, will get you to where you want to be.

Larry the Caravan Master



Posted by OldBones-Larry Mar 8, 2019

After the sun went down, I began walking across the desert last night. The journey has been slow with many stops for rest.

I know this is going to be a long journey across the desert back to the mountain. 

I will take my time and will travel by night since I must walk the entire way.

I will make this journey as I did before, with one step at a time. 

This malady, affliction, disease, or whatever you wish to call it will not rule me. 

I will constantly fight to keep it at bay and not let it rule my life.

As I must remain strong in this journey, I encourage all that are traveling to do the same.

We will reach our destination in time.

One step, and then another, will get you to where you want to be.

Larry the Caravan Master


Defeat ????

Posted by OldBones-Larry Mar 7, 2019

I climbed over the edge of the Depression Gorge a few minutes ago.

It was a long climb up with many falls back down to the bottom. A voice kept whispering that I should just give in and stay at the bottom.

I think you know that I couldn't do that.

I am looking across the desert to get my bearings and will begin the journey back to the mountain soon.

I am still not "cured" as a lot of people think I should be.

Depression is like addiction in many ways. It is a thing that can come back to bother you again and again. 

Though I can honestly say that all my addictions are in my past, I still stay vigilant against them.

Depression is the same, though not as easy to guard against.

I have battled with this for many years and have been so far down that I was ready to give up many times.

I always found the strength to fight my way back up from the depths though. I never took that final step that the inner demons were so wanting me to take.

I will continue the fight this time as I always have before.

I will get back to the mountain and mount another caravan across the desert of NML as I vowed to The Old Goat that I would do.

Travel strong my fellow trekkers.

One step, and then another, will get you to where you want to be.

Larry the Caravan Master



Posted by OldBones-Larry Feb 24, 2019

After I left the cave where I was trying to regain my balance and center myself once more, I began moving down the gorge.

I found an area of the wall that wasn't as steep as the rest. I thought I heard something above the normal sounds of the desert. 

It sounded like voices so I began climbing up the wall.

It has been several days now since I began this climb and as I looked up last night I thought I saw the glow from a fire.

The sounds have become stronger and I think there was some music playing.

I will keep climbing and I will reach the top.

Depression Gorge will be left behind and I hope never seen again. 

I will do my best to not trek into this area of the desert again.

Keep your journeys strong my fellow travelers. 

You can get across the desert of NML if you keep traveling toward the mountain in the distance.

One step, and then another, will get you to where you want to be.

Larry the Caravan Master


Thank you

Posted by OldBones-Larry Feb 11, 2019

I send my most heartfelt thank you for all of your birthday wishes. You will never know how much they mean to this old camel driver.



Wisdom From the Past

Posted by OldBones-Larry Feb 6, 2019

I have seen several posts lately about wish me luck, I will try this, and so many others.

I have time to think a lot right now as I work through things. I remembered some very wise words from a lady that I held dear in my heart.

I feel that Joan would like me to post this again for her to pass on her words to the new quitters here at EX.

The words are simple, but carry so much meaning.

What Makes A Quit? 

TheOldGoat-Joan-10-21-1994 would want everyone to succeed in this journey.

I was very privileged to know this dear woman and am so very glad to pass her words along.




Posted by OldBones-Larry Feb 5, 2019

I found a small cave here in Depression Gorge. As I looked in, I felt a strong pull to enter.

When I got clear to the back I found an old firepit there. There was a supply of firewood and several small pouches lying there there.

I opened the pouches to find the herbs I would use at a Cleansing.

I lit the fire and began preparations to clear myself of all negative energies.

That being done, I will begin trying to center myself in my Circle of Life once more.

My Spirit is out of balance and I must center it again.

I urge you all to travel safely my friends.

One step, and then another, will get you to where you want to be.



Still in the Gorge

Posted by OldBones-Larry Jan 29, 2019

Just wanted to let everyone know that I am holding my own, though still where I was.

I will continue to work on getting out of this so I can return to where I feel I need to be.

As I tell others, so I must do myself.....

One step, and then another, will get me (and you) where we want to be.



Depression Gorge

Posted by OldBones-Larry Jan 26, 2019

I just wanted everyone to know that I am still here. 

I haven't been posting a lot and probably will only be reading for a while. I will comment if I feel I can contribute.

I can safely say that my quit is not in any danger and that Ol' Nic will not pull me back into his Nicotine Prison.

I am revisiting a place on this journey that I had hoped to never see again.

It is called Depression Gorge and is located close to and just before the Relapse Rocks.

I like several others suffer from Depressive Disorder. Right now I am battling another round.

The worst I have suffered in close to 10 years.

I ask you all to know that I am with you in spirit, if not in words.

I hold you all in my heart, and in my thoughts.

One step at a time will get me through this as it always has before.

One step, and then another, will get you to where you want to be.




Posted by OldBones-Larry Jan 21, 2019

On this day I wish to share something from the Ancient Ones.

Since time began, they have wished peace on this world. Men would not pay heed to this until the time came for them to walk the Hanging Road. Then they too could see what the Ancients were talking about.

So, on this day, I wish to pass on a wish for all men to live in peace and brotherhood.

May all men come together and become as one on this our Earth Mother.

Larry (Soaring Eagle)



Posted by OldBones-Larry Jan 17, 2019

I have seen a couple of posts where someone has said they were a failure....

That is "stinkin' thinkin'" my friends. You did not fail.

The only way you will fail in this journey is if you just plain give up and stop trying to quit smoking! Are you willing to get up, dust yourself off, and begin the journey once again?

Then you are not a failure!!

You suffered a slip in thinking because of the addiction to nicotine.

Ol' Nic is a strong character. He is also a conniving a$$ that will do anything to keep you in his clutches. 

 Fill your quit toolbox with the weapons you need to reject Nic's lure and hold.

Use gum, hard candies, cut straws, a lemon, put your head in the freezer or anything you can think of to kill the crave.

This journey cannot be made in one day. If it could Nic wouldn't have any prisoners to his poison.

A journey is a series of steps that take you somewhere.

The same with your quit journey.

Take things one second, one minute, one hour, one day at a time. 

You will get to the other side of NML that way.

I know you can do it!!

Ask for help when you need it and I will promise that people here will do their best to help.

One step, and the another, will get you where you want to be.