When you're young in your quit and your emotions start spinning, you are remembering the feeling of the drug, and how you felt, how it grounded you, gave you time to think and just shut everything down for 5-10 minutes.
Later in your quit, you aren't fooled by those memories of the drug. You've learned that one puff will start the cycle all over again.
We chose to let smoking ground us.
You need to find something that grounds you when your emotions are spinning.
I would suggest, the quickest way to ground yourself is selftalk.
I used "I don't do that anymore." That phrase slowed me down so my quit was still important and, I didn't just throw it away.
I like that phrase because it's not harsh. If you analyze it, it's just a reminder.
What's so magical about it, is that it works and nothing will retrain your thinking faster than a continued reminder
Think about it. Find Your Reminder.
It doesn't have to sound mean or harsh or angry. You could make it funny like "Nag nag nag nag nag."
Quitting smoking isn't about being angry but it becomes that for some. They're angry that they can't smoke. What they really are is frustrated.
They are frustrated they can't do what they're used to doing.
Frustration is what takes new quitters back to smoking.
Smoking became the connection to our memories and emotions and, routines.
This is why we have to unlearn smoking. That is why time is the healer.
A reminder disconnects you. Find your reminder, and use it.
That phrase will become your shutoff switch and save your quit over and over.
It' inevitable we will have deeply emotional memories after we quit smoking.
I was thinking of Christmas just now. More about how it was never going to be the same again. It was a melancholy realization.
My mom had 9 brothers and sisters and my dad 7.
Before we moved to the house my dad built when I was 11, we lived in a smaller house so we used to have two Christmas Eve get togethers. One for my dad's side early and then, one for my mom's side of the family.
After we moved my dads family started having theirs at one my cousins house but they had dogs that my mom was extremely allergic to, so, we had to stop going there. After we moved it was either at our house or my aunt's house.
We regularly had over 100 people at the latter. People would drop in for a couple hours so everything was fluid. Everyone brought a favorite dish, sweet or savory and there was always a huge punch bowl with ginger ale and orange sherbet that was constantly being added to. It was our once a year for everyone get together.
We had 40 Richfield (service station) Christmas carol books. We'd pass them out and I would play guitar or bass and my twin and younger brother would play guitar and piano. We'd go through every carol in the book and end the music by my singing O Holy Night for my mom.
She left us in 1999. Somewhere, I believe have a video of her doing a dance with one of her brothers her last Christmas. She knew it was her last and wanted that to be a special memory of her.
Her doctor had told her she had 10 years to live just 9 years earlier after she contracted a heart virus on a trip to Europe that had specifically attacked and damaged her heart. She first told us this in August of 1998, 9 months before she left.
Sadness does not require smoking. Happiness does not require smoking.
Life is both and we can live through both without smoking.
Merry Christmas, smoke free, in August.
I found the video of my mom dancing with her brother Byron.
Since I can't post a video to this blog I'm posting it in the following link.
Beginning when we were young, we used to go to camping in Yosemite for two weeks every summer.. One of the favorite things to do there besides seeing Half Dome, El Capitan, Yosemite Falls and the other natural wonders.
Some of the most fun was swimming in the river but there were risks.
Nature can create hidden dangers in the form of a deep holes where the river picks up speed and can suck you downward in a strong vortex.
This happened to me when I was about 8 and if my dad had not been watching me, I would have drowned.
My dad saved me from drowning but, I had to save myself when it came to smoking.
You have the power to save yourself by making an informed decision (the informer is you) and being willing to let time distance you from the ritual and addiction of smoking.