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All People > jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007 > jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007 Blog > 2017 > January

where to start a blog.


Because when I clicked on conversations to write something I had the choice of ask a question or start a discussion.

The pencil icon top right of the page has blog in the dropdown menu..



I've pretty much seen it all.

In the first year I was here, There was a huge disagreement and half the people left

There have been some large scandals since, but, we made it through...

None of us know what the future brings but all of us can choose to not include smoking.

"and now, the end is near, this afternoon, we're changing platforms..........

                                                         I Quit It My Way"

Vaya con Dios Elgg

I sent her a pm.

Don't even know if she's alive to receive it

Here's one of her blogs

A lot of great people have passed through here these past 9 years.



                                  "I don't do that anymore."

     We offer what we've learned and wish we'd known, but, the willingness must be your own.

     I'm going to share something you may not hear anyplace else and this is very powerful.

     You don't have to want to quit smoking to quit smoking.  Let that sink in. It's the absolute truth and unless you want to cling to smoking, you will succeed. Dr's tell people all the time they have to quit, and they do.  A friend asked me if I would quit to influence his brother. I did. Every smoker thinks they're different, untrue. All make the same excuses.

     Successful quits have to be active. You have to unlearn thinking of smoking and that means making other choices on the spur of the moment. It means planning ahead when you know you might be in a setting that would compromise your quit. In other words, waking up out of the smoking cycle and being willing to change.

     Spend as much time here as you can, reading the blogs, writing your own and asking questions. Some here have many years of helping people under our belts and we are here for no other reason but to help you quit.

      I smoked at least a pack a day for 40 years, much more when I was younger,  so, I know how to smoke as well as anyone.  I'll have been quit for 10 years this January 2. I've spent over thirty-five thousand hours on this and another site watching thousands and thousands of people try to quit.

     By observing, reading, and asking questions of them, I've  correlated what I believe makes both the physical addiction and the psychological addiction (habit) of smoking tick. It is a defineable process.

What To Expect The First 4 Months

For those who haven't started to stop smoking, make it a game. We will teach you what you need to know and get you prepared  but please, if you are having difficulty getting started, please do what is suggested in the next link. This is the simple way I began my one and only quit without anxiety or stress. It makes you think before you smoke which gets you off autopilot without freaking yourself out.

    Every moment of every personal event missed to go have a smoke whether in triumph or defeat, joy or sadness is gone forever. We  did not experience reality in the same context as those around us.  (unless they were smokers too)

     We simply were not present. We were thinking about smoking before and during those chunks of life we missed and, we just kept repeating it over and over and over and over.....

     There are things we all experience to different degrees but in approximately the same timeline. I have helped  many succeed and have yet to find a more rewarding or valuable way to spend my time.

You are worth it. We are here to help you succeed anytime you're decided.


Life keeps coming, good days and bad. Smoking is not required.

No Luck Is Involved.  You have to do some cocooning to become a butterfly. Time Is The Healer.

"Hope" is wishing, not doing. Once you decide to quit, you can. Until then, you will flounder.

     Quitting isn't about what you use or your exact plan. Quitting is about being willing. Willing to be honest with yourself. Willing to not let  your emotions rule your quit, and then, willing to give yourself enough time to get over the first two humps; The first month, and the 100 days that follow.

     There is no "magic" button but there is a fairly easy way to do it with understanding and the correct mindset.

     Blame any physical or emotional discomfort on smoking, not quitting.

     Remember, people who never smoked have good and bad days too. 

     Smoking does not make things better.

     It is an illusion caused by the dopamine release nicotine causes when it hits the pleasure receptors.  Nicotine has literally hijacked our brain and made it so we cannot experience pleasure in a normal way.

     We want to help you get through this in the easiest possible way. You do not need to want to quit. You must however, decide to quit and then, be willing to unlearn what you've done for however many years you've smoked.

     If you have had difficulty quitting in the past, you must stop doing it in the same way.

     As children our favorite and most repeated question on any long road trip was, "are we there yet?" This is why I focus on what to expect and when.

       What I've learned is once the nicotine is out of your system (and,  even before,) it is all about approach, perserverence and simply knowing it will get better in time.

What To Expect The First 4 Months


The Ride

     The first 2-3 weeks are the worst time for most quitters. You may feel like you're in a fog, disconnected, shaky. Emotions are all over the map. Your mind and body are experiencing great changes!

     At about 3-4 weeks you will start  feeling much better and think you're over it.


Watch Your Back the 100 days following your first month.

During their first 130 days is when I see most people drop the ball. No mans land cravings can come out of nowhere, and knock the quit out of you.

     Don't Drop The Ball! You've already proven you don't need to smoke by making it this far. Why would you give in now?


     Thomas posted a study on 8-27-12 in the following link describing the cues to smoke (craves) as being more intense in the first few months after the initial 35 days. This is ONLY a small part of the reason I focus on the first 130 days and exactly what I have described as "No Mans Land." (actually, years before Thomas discovered this link)

No Mans Land (Days 30-130 Approx. Study From Thomas Precedes)

     And, Finally,  two sets of seasons, the continuation of building new memories without smoking to strengthen your quit

Quitting is what you make it.

About laughing out loud

     Nicotine keeps you coming back for more while you are a smoker but long after people have quit using it, long after the pleasure receptors we sensitized to nicotine have died off, it's the memories experienced during each of those smokes and the emotions we've connected to them that make people come back to smoking. Nicotine is the physical addiction but is 10% of quitting, the habit and years of repetition (the psychological part) I consider to be 90%.

     Does the patch really double your chances of quitting? The patch can help take the edge off to help you focus on working through part of the initial unlearning of the habit but it will not quit for you and it will not keep you quit.

     At 6 months people who used the patch the entire suggested course of treatment went back to smoking at the same rate as everyone else.

     What about people claiming "Harm Reduction" using an Ecig?       We don't, as yet, have enough studies as to what damage they do and don't do because ecigs haven't been around long enough.

     If you are looking at using an ecig to quit smoking you may want to ask yourself  what you are gaining?

     If you are still getting nicotine you are still addicted to it. If you are unwilling to unlearn the psychological addiction, (The hand to mouth and inhale motion of smoking) how will you ever be free of the same thoughts as a smoker? You are simply replacing smoking with a different delivery device.

     Smoking is slavery no matter how you do it. The only way to be free is to unlearn the hand to mouth and inhale motions.

     The lining of your mouth absorbs nicotine from an ecig whether you inhale or not just like a cigar.

      Question. Have you ever met someone who quit smoking using an ecig who is not still using an ecig?

     My best suggestion I have is look in the mirror when you use it and tell me that's what you wan't people to see and judge you by.

On the double the success claim using nrt's?

      "I traced this claim to a Department of Health web page, which also claimed a 15 per cent success rate at 12 months for NRT. The evidence that was supposed to demonstrate this 15 per cent success rate and the "four times more likely to quit" phenomenon was not listed in the footnotes, so I wrote to the Department to ask for it.

  It took over three months to get the information[3]

When that information was finally forthcoming, the figures showed a 6.5% quit rate for those using NRT, and a 6% quit rate for those going "cold turkey, i.e. without using NRT." So much for the "15% success rate" and "four times more likely" claims. (see following link)

     Now, I've put in enough time here to know I can't save everybody. People talk themselves into smoking. It's not my fault. People put themselves in risky situations and choose to smoke. It's not my fault.          

     Every time people quit then choose to smoke, they break a promise to themselves and put another hole in their armor until there is no armor left.

     It's not my fault.

Hang on and you'll make it! Smoke and you won't!

Lighten up! Humor is good for your quit.

A sense of humor is vital!

For those of you who think you are going to do it "your way" and have one here and there along the way?

Nicotine receptors are not moral or ethical judges. They cannot be lied to. They tell your brain the last time they were fed, not you.

They are chemical receptors. They do not begin dying off permanently and become replaced by new "regular" pleasure receptors until you stop feeding them.

"If you've quit smoking and you're still smoking? You're doing it wrong."

Keep looking forward, eyes on the road. Don't get distracted, don't let go! (there's no such thing as a good slip!) penguin

Be Free!!!

"Your Quit Will Be Yours 'Til You Don't Want It Anymore"

v v v v v   Who Do You Want To Lead You Up The Mountain?   v v v v v

Damage Control Not For One, But The Whole

People come on the eX, a public board, and are permitted to say anything,  right or wrong, misleading or even rediculous.

As a long term quitter of tobacco and nicotine and a helper on this and another site since I quit almost 9 years ago, I  imagine people who are not participating but just reading the blogs are thrown off track because someone put misinformation or a wrong attitude in someone's mind and got them thinking of a workaround to getting their fix until they do.

The Addict Mind Will Glom Onto ANY Idea That Gives Them ANY Form Of Permission To Risk Failure  and, It doesn’t take much when you’re looking for a way out of the misery you are feeling, perceived or real.

Example: “They Drank All Weekend And Didn’t Smoke, SO CAN I.”

Example: “They didn’t count their “slip”, so why should I”?

When I see people post harmful ideas that may take someone down the wrong road,  I feel it’s my duty to counteract these ideas and within an effective time frame.  The damage is done to other readers if I wait until tomorrow so, I do it as soon as possible.

Now, in some peoples eyes, they may see it as a personal attack. It’s not my intention that it be that. I try to never directly attack a persons character (because I don’t know them.) Instead, I try to put discussion of what my objections are in my own blog post.  These new quitters often attack my character (again, they don’t know me from Adam so I typically sit back and take it) They start name calling and may demand that you not post on their blog and if you do, they delete your comments. And yet, they will continue to write nasty things on your blog.
I write my own blog on the topic to counteract the effect their’s may have and not have my comments deleted. Again, I always try to stay on topic and not make it personal.

Now admin in some groups doesn’t care what people put out there and will defend their right to say it. I too defend the right for people to say whatever they want and it is not my intent to belittle someone but,  if I can save 10 people from taking the misinformation or wrong attitude and running directly to failure, I have been willing to take the heat for it.

Possible reactions:
These people whose ideas have been questioned can go to admin of the site and complain that they are being bullied. In admin’s eyes that is a possibility so they reprimand me/us. This last time was a public reprimand. In my eyes, this crossed the line.

So, I suggest that admin look a little deeper. I suggest admin look at the whole and not giving more credence to one person who is passing out bad ideas or misinformation that might take one person or many  off the path of success over someone who has spent 10 hours a day here for over 8 years watching people’s choices and seeing them fail.

This has nothing to do with how you quit, what method you choose etc. It is about planting a misinformed seed in the minds of many who may choose to water that seed and fail because of it.

That said, I’m out of here, possibly permanently. And Tommy, I built this place too. It hurts to leave but the lack of support by the administration here is mind boggling.

To the administrators of this website.....Look at the elders blogs and the timing of them. I feel what what we do here is mostly damage control. Most of our blogs are in response to what the mood of the board is or what’s being/been said. We are trying to keep people on the path to success. It isn’t any fun being attacked for doing so by peoples shortsightedness. In fact, it’s very wearing
and YOUR lack of support has just worn me out.

to all my friends and those who give a damn about truth....

"hasta la vista~~~~vaya von dios"

Everything you need to understand about cravings, habit, and memories

On Weight Gain

Don't substitute moon pies for cigarettes

How to use the site, make a countup clock, post a picture, etc


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Brief Description

Fear of the unknown is the seed of deception. If someone has a knife to your throat, you have a right to be fearful.  If that someone is you, YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR MIND'S DIRECTION.



"keep them away from your face"


willingness not willpower. stop fighting yourself. it's tiring and counterproductive.


onward and upward.  good days and bad.  if you allow time heal you, you'll be free and, glad!


Well? :-)

Posted by jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007 Jan 23, 2017

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Posted by jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007 Jan 18, 2017

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Say a prayer for her. She lives by herself and has a lot of stairs.

I took this picture about an hour ago. I was out with Hoggie yesterday and saw two guys trying to free this truck.

The thing is, this isn't the first time workers for this neighbor got stuck in the mud.

If they used some common sense, they would learn you can't drive this area the first day after numerous days of rain.

If you listen to our advice and follow it, you learn from our mistakes and those we have seen others make.  :-)

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I cannot have anything but water until I've taken a double dose of acid supressant and waited 30 minutes.

I took my pill and slugged it down with my water bottle and eagerly anticipated my coffee.

When it was time to go get my coffee, I spied the nearly empty bottle and decided to finish off the last of the water and put the bottle in recycling.

As I looked at the remaining water before I drank it, I noticed my pill was floating in it.

Was I disappointed I would have to wait another thirty minutes for my coffee? Yes.

Do I turn it into a big deal and let it raise my blood pressure or make me yell at Hoggie? No.

Sometimes you just have to laugh at yourself and  ACCEPT.

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Accept quitting and it will go much smoother. The little things that don't go the way we want are insignificant.

This is a great place to learn to quit smoking. not so great for people who want to advertise.

Learn is the key word.

Smokers are oblivious to their plight while they are smokers.

I think it must be some form of denial.

Whatever it is, you need to know what you are up against.

It's probably not what you imagine.

Unlearning the psychological connections to the repetitive actions and ritual is the key.

You only do that in time and by making other choices as a non smoker until you see the changes so you can accept the different reality and cope with your emotions in other ways.

My page may be of help to you.

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they were here 18 days into NML speaking of a smooth trip and now that blog and they are gone>

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but I'm not smoking over it!

When I added the creamer,

they became easy to spot.

I thought "they're from the microwave"

until I found out NOT..

They're crawling on my nice carafe

There's nothing sweet in there

Did not know ants needed caffeine

I put a terro there.

Damn ants are everywhere.

Please, don't forget to welcome the uk business directory.  :-)

PS Good Morning

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Both on my blog and on my message board, and, on the Freedom Train!  :-)

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It's the time of year for the resolutionists to quit smoking.

There is no luck to quitting.

You make a decision and you believe it will get better and, it will.

Get through the first 4 months and most are through the time I see many people give up.

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