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All People > jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007 > jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007 Blog > 2016 > January
2016
  
   
    
     
      
       
             When I fell off a ladder in 2000 I was thinking "A month or two in a cast and I'll be back to normal" An hour later when every doctor in the hospital formed a line and paraded by to look at my foot which didn't even look like it was part of my leg, I didn't know what to think.      
      
     
     I went in for surgery late that night and after 5 hours they were too exhausted to finish. The next day the surgeon told me I had shattered the bones in my leg in 80 places, severed the lymph system and much of the blood vessels and he was going to go back in that day and finish up as best he could.   
     As it turned out, I was in a wheelchair and crutches for three years. After doing PT for 6 months (4 of it with a cast on)  I realized I couldn't push off with the ball of my foot because the ankle bone was not fused at the proper angle during  the surgery.  I could go on but the first 6 months gets me to the point of this story   
     Had I known it was going to be three years instead of a couple months I don't know how or if I could have dealt with it.  
  
  

     I tell you this because many of you think quitting is such a difficult task but compared to those three years of trial and pain (that were out of my control,)

  

Quitting is manageable. You are the only one making you smoke. It's in your control.

     ~~~Let each day strengthen you for the next and press onward~~~

Thoughts are what take people back to smoking.

Don't dwell on thoughts of smoking.

Smoking was a mirage that we created to get the drug.

Say

"I don't do that anymore"

it retrains your brain to shut the door..

We've been there. We offer Clarity not judgement.

You have a decision to make.

jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007

>POINT

Posted by jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007 Jan 28, 2016

I hope we all know the answer to that.

You can smoke and say it didn't mean anything and go on pretending it didn't happen

but,

when you do that and don't start over (you've already given yourself permission once so it's easier to use the first slip to justify the second.)

you've most likely already subconscously given yourself permission to do it again.

When there is a cost for losing your quit (starting over) you are much more likely to not do it again.

I see two other authors BLOGS with their avatars, NOT THE AUTHOR OF THE BLOG i'M LOOKING AT.

ANYBODY ELSE???

am i going off the deep end?

But not so much for Dillie Deer.

She is blind. Abandoned but found love and gives love

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGeQE-BBDvI

Live webcam feed 24/7

http://www.dilliedeer.com/dilliecam.html

That's mango gelato on my lips....

mmmm

Blackberries and mango gelato

this deer says domo arigato

You decide where your quit will be by the way you think of it!

She has one 10am EST.

I'm wishing her the confidence of a non smoker, and an instant opportunity to begin.

GO KIM!

Remember to look them in the eye when communicating.

Humans can decide and change.

Our status in the brain chain gives us the ability and advantage of looking ahead, NOT just in the moment.

If you'll stop blaming smoking on situations and emotions, you will succeed!

Science says it isn't true but I can say, from my daily observations, "It's always colder before the dawn."

I usually go to bed about midnight Eastern time and get up about 6am Eastern time and I've noticed that the temperature consistently drops a few degrees in the hour or two before the sun comes up.

BUT THE SUN DOES COME UP!

You have control of your quit.Pay attention to it, Give it the time it takes, and, You will be free.

  

I've been watching these guys trying to dig/pull/oust a complete stranger from a snow bank for the past 45 minutes. They broke their tow cable, shoveled and shoveled and watched people pass them by but. THEY HAVEN'T SMOKED!

  

HaHa The wife of the webcam just called to see if they ripped the bumper off her car when the tow cable broke. :-)  Ut Oh!

I received a message in my inbox this morning from someone who asked for my help privately. Her nursing schedule didn't allow her time to spend here. We texted back and forth a few times when times got tough and talked her out of smoking. Anyway, she has 3 years.

My point is, if you need some extra help, get a lifeline in someone's phone number you would trust to confidently talk you out of smoking. Talk with them at least once so you know their voice.

Also, the site can go down unexpectedly for a day or perhaps you are having internet or computer problems or your schedule doesn't allow you to be here when you are tempted to smoke.

All you have to do is reach out to anyone you feel comfortable with and send them a pm.

Plan ahead to protect your quit!.

Did you ever stop to consider that smoking was a turning point in our lives?

When we became dependent on smoking, I believe many of us gave the keys to our imagination to nicotine.

remember using your imagination?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e3HTKM4Ya-E

move your right hand up and across your chest and put it on your left shoulder!

Next, take your left hand and put it on your right shoulder!

Now, give a gentle squeeze.

You deserve it for deciding to not smoke and following through by honoring that decision,

(You can stop anytime you no longer feel comfortable hugging yourself. or, you might set a new record.)

http://nbc4i.com/2016/01/12/bear-hug-viral-video-shows-trainer-and-bear-sharing-hug/

I know you new quitters may think 2 years is a long time off but it truly passes quicker than you think.

  
   
    
     
      
       
        
         It really does take two sets of seasons (that's 2 years of holidays, physical season changes, emotional upheavals) to be reasonably confident you aren't going to choose to smoke again..       
It's logical if you thoughtfully consider it.      
We smoked for a long time and we have connected it to everything we do daily.     
We always knew when and planned where we could smoke and managed to be there at the right time or shortly thereafter.    
That's only part of it.   
    

Now we have to consider the emotions we've connected to smoking.
Love,

    

Stress,

    

Loss,

    

Fear.

    

Through it all, we gave nicotine the power to soothe and calm.

   
Certain combinations of prior actions trigger memories which are bound to trigger emotions because, they are tied together "up there." 
  

Your first year quit you may get through a situation fine but during the same holiday the following year you might see someone from the past that may trigger strong emotions of a sad or traumatic experience.

  

I say this so you see the "connection" process as I believe it applies to all our life experience whether we are smokers or not.

  Our memories, though out of our control, constantly shape our future actions as our experience grows..

The statistics for relapse drop drastically at two years.
Stay with it and see!

There's no such thing as buying mini cookies thinking you'll eat less that way.
You'll begin eating them one at a time, then, in groups the same number as your fingers and toes and it will progress to the number of teeth in your mouth, and, then the hairs on your head.

What am I talking about here?
YOU CAN'T HAVE JUST ONE!
Don't rationalize your way back to the big cookie! (smoking)

Today was unloading and defrosting a freezer and a refrigerator freezer. I do it the old fashioned way. (with a garden hose  :-)

It's quick and fun to watch how fast the ice melts.

And we all know "you can't smoke with wet hands."

:-)

You can quit smoking at any time.

Quit Now while you have our support.

Nicotine leaves your body 72 hours after you stop using it.

In two or three weeks you will be through most of the physical discomfort.

From that point on, it's just the unlearning of your memories by making new ones without smoking.

and a request for name and password

YET, it does not clear the request for name and password after you enter them

Anyone else having this problem when you try to reply on a blog?

it's bigger than you it's bigger than me

and maybe the hope growing right from the heart

will grow like your quit, from a tiny start

be grateful each day, be all you can be

and smoking will lift, and you will be free.

Never was a child born smoking a cigarette!

Or

Who are you cheating by smoking after you've quit? It's not the neighbor or the dog. It's you.

This is why the "slip" word is rediculous. It's simply an after-excuse.

Remaining a smoker is cheating yourself out of what could be your future.

A couple of slips can trap you into many more years of smoking.

Be resolved.

The Quit You Save Will Be Your Own

Let's all give her our home remedies.

I'll start

If you will put mayonnaise in your armpits, you will believe the mucous has relocated

or

you're a turkey sandwich

jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007

change

Posted by jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007 Jan 10, 2016

con·ster·na·tion>> feelings of anxiety or dismay

per·tur·ba·tion>>anxiety; mental uneasiness.a deviation of a system, moving object, or process from its regular or normal state of path, caused by an outside influence. (change?)

Doing things differently is NATURALLY going to cause uneasiness. CHANGE ALWAYS DOES.

You must step out of the mental smoking circle to get over the idea that not doing what you are used to doing is creating most of the uneasiness.

The next time you feel perturbed or consterned (new word?), step outside yourself and accept that change is the culprit and the only way to get you out of the smoking trap is by changing.

I wish you two quarters, a nickel and a dime and the quit of a lifetime. :-)

i left her a note and haven't heard anything.

DancingThruLife

It appears the last time she was here was Dec 22.

Has anyone heard from her since then?

Once I quit, I never fought myself. Yes, I thought about smoking, probably as often as expected of anyone quitting after smoking for 40 years but, I never considered it.

Never thought about bumming one

Never went to the store or even out to my truck

I just never let it get that far.

You have the same control.

Find it and use it. Learn to distract yourself from smoking thoughts from the beginning by realizing they are only thoughts and you will get there..

Living is more than thinking about smoking. I did that for 40 years.

That will never change.

That is why I feel the best I can do is try to get you to the 2% club where statistically you are in the strongest place to remain quit.

I don't believe a study on the recidivism rate of 10 year quits exists.. :-)

Why? Because it's alcohol in tandem with access to cigarettes that kills most long term quits and that could happen any time we put ourselves in these situations.

If having to run outside the hospital to smoke while your parent or sibling, close relative or partner is dying of emphysema or lung cancer doesn't scare you smokeless, what do you think is going to do it? We are watching them waste away and not even making the connection that it could be us.

We've known of the severe illnesses caused by smoking since the 1970's and yet, we all smoked until we didn't.

You don't have to be scared to quit.

Quitting is not a scary thing. Quitting is simply doing things without smoking until the consideration of smoking actually goes away. And it does.

....that is if you don't keep throwing the idea of smoking in your own face with your bad self talk. :-)

Oh and if your doctor orders you to quit smoking you can still be agreeable.

or the site is very slow.

What do you think?

all ending in a silvery grey

why can't we band together and help find what it is?

Would you all try something for me sometime in the next week?

you can google online timer and have a window open with that, tabs of other open windows but sometime, open THIS BLOG. You can come click on my blogs and look for the "TEST" in the title.

set your timer for 15 minutes, open this page and start the timer.

When the timer goes off after 15 minutes post the word TEST as a response in this blog. If it posts, set the timer for 20 minutes and try again. If we do this in 5 minute increments until it won't post, maybe we can at least pin the trip time it blocks our posting and save ourselves alot of frustration.

UPDATE: We are at 30 minute for when Giulia couldn't post. Elvan has also hit 30. Anyone willing to go past that?

UPDATE: I have been blocked at 40 minutes 3 out of 4 times.

If it doesn't post at 15 minutes set it for 10 minutes and work backwards.

We will also learn if it affects everyone or just a few if we participate.

PS you can still go to other sites while you are waiting for the timer to go off, just leave this page open while you're doing it.

there's a list of 100 things to do when you get a craving that circulates around here.

It's a "get busy and do something" list.

I am more into sensory shock

Not the bad ones like fire and electricity

The safe ones.

Cold, Taste, etc.

If you get a craving you can't shake:

Bite into a lemon skin and all!

Stick your head in the freezer and count to 20!

Pack your mouth with ice cubes and try to not get brain freeze.

There is a reason these will instantly divert the crave.

It is because our senses take priority over our thinking mind in those times.

If you will do one of these, you may find you think of them the next time you get a serious crave and may not actually have to do it again. Just gotta get out of the smoking mindset and these are some ways to do it immediately!.

First of all, if you don't yet understand the mechanics of how nicotine affects our system, there are nicotinic pleasure receptors in part of our brain and when they are stimulated they become highly sensitized to getting or not getting it. That's what makes us keep coming back to smoking during our waking hours.

So, in order to successfully quit smoking, we must find other ways to get that dopamine or we will feel something is lacking and may go back to smoking.

Did you know that when you think of something pleasurable dopamine is released before you even do what caused the dopamine release in the first place?

Example:

You can think of something you enjoy eating or look at pictures of that food and you will get the dopamine release without the calories.

Music is great for releasing dopamine and it can be any kind, happy or sad.

Exercise is wonderful for dopamine.

Cooking and Baking can be great if you enjoy doing either or both. You could take some to a neighbor or a shut in if you can afford the ingredients and give someone else pleasure too.

Cleaning. Cleaning never gave me a dopamine release but  there is a pleasure after accomplishing it. :-)

I believe they worked on the site about a month ago and since that time, there is a 1 in my inbox notification area but no unread message. Youngatheart says it's the same for her.

anybody else?

:-)

I've noticed most groups tend to lose participation quickly as people lose their quits and leave the site..

So what are groiups for? What do groups do?

Since we don't have live chat, they enable topics of conversation that may or may not relate to what's going on in the blogs.

There are daily pledge groups.

There are groups for people who quit the same month as others in the group.

Groups induce comraderie.

They can produce humor, creativity and sharing.

I heard it from a little bird that they want to slim down the untended non participating groups.

It was also suggested I might spruce up my latest group so I've renamed it, explained it and all are welcome.

It's about insights and milestones in your quit smoking walk.

Here's a link.

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/celebrating-milestones

If you've realized something you've overcome on your quit smoking walk, join the group and share it with us.Someone else might be ready to experience the same think or it may give another the confidence to go on.

Perhaps you have an idea that has not been created as a group multiple to hundreds of times that we could flesh out and see what interest there is?

and I'm not talking days

But there is only one place that each and every one of us have to get to to finally succeed.

The willing point.

Are you there yet?

First, Happy New Year!

For those who have just quit and are feeling out of sorts and discombobulated , please step into the recombobulation area.for your first coffee without a cigarette. Can't think of coffee without a cigarette? So change it up!   Drink it with your other hand. Drink it in a different place.

Success is about change and no longer being a Butt Tomato Magnet

Now a few questions. to show you where we all came from:


First Question:
What would be the first thing a smoker reaches for on New Years Day?
Question:
What would be the first thing a smoker made sure they had in an emergency situation?
Question:
What is the first thing a smoker wants after a meal?
After sex?
Outside a funeral? After church?

Do you see the smokers mindset?  Do you see yourself?

And now, do you understand how big the changes must be for you to succeed?
Will you be holding onto your quit or will you be holding onto smoking?

We'll be here to help you through the milestones of quitting.

Stick around!

Ask questions. We will help you navigate the site and your quit so you succeed!

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