Skip navigation
All People > jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007 > jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007 Blog > 2015 > April

Larry wanted us to know he is thinking of us.

He's still having vascular issues with his legs.

Let's keep him in our thoughts..

Someone asked me this morning and I have no idea. I did a site search and all his blogs are no longer there.

Anybody know?

"You really have to want to quit to be successful"

Did you ever stop to think that you could just decide to quit?

That you could decide you weren't buying any more cigarettes?

That you could decide other peoples cigarettes did not belong to you.

That you were not entitled to bum one just because you used to smoke?

That there is no standing order saying you have to smoke whenever the thought pops into your head?

I believe that you CAN decide to quit and if you are willing and take the brainwashing away, you will be successful as long as you choose to be.

"Your quit will be yours 'til you don't want it anymore."

It's not uncomfortable forever. The thoughts of smoking do fade away in time.

Willingness to CHANGE.

How can you do one without the other?

You cannot succeed forever until you turn it to the "willingness to change" channel.

She's asked me to REMIND you to


That the reason there are three strengths of patches is so you can step down and get off them?

Now I don't know what the intended length of the program is but if the primary goal is to step down the nicotine and get off it and not just keep using nicotine for 10 weeks or whatever

Why couldn't you just step around that full program mentality and get yourself off them at YOUR WILL.

As YOU become comfortable.

This "I have to do the whole program to be successful is UNTRUE.

People who use the patch it's full course of treatment go back tp smoking at the same rate as everyone else at 6 months.

When you grasp the concept that you are thinking of smoking but you don't need to smoke, you are getting close to knowing what quitting is about from YOUR PERSPECTIVE, and you may be ready to let it go.

The patch is an aid that can allow you to step outside your old reality as a smoker, think about what you are doing and take control of YOUR QUIT, nothing more.

I realize there will be some who used the patch it's full course and will claim that's what gave them their success, I believe if you believe something, you can make it real for you and have seen this quite evident watching people quit smoking. In the end, you will discover this is all more of a head game than a nicotine game.

          We all came to believe a drug was stronger than ourselves.        
We all came to believe it was the most important thing in our lives.        
Oh, we never talked about it or confronted it but our years of actions spoke louder than our words.      
We let it become the joy in our life.     
We took it's advice and succumbed to its control and relinquished our lives to it.     
Why do we stick around? To help you open your eyes and see this.    
Do You Want Out? You can't change until you wake up.  
Will you wake up? Will you break out of the nicotine nightmare and make your new dreams?  
    It's letting go of the drug and then, it's overcoming memories that urge us to repeat something that we made our "normal." 
   Do we need to over think that until we create enough chaos in our minds to smoke?
Keep It Simple Stupid

Time is the healer

Our friends in Nashville are just now sitting down to breakfast together. They send their love

They are all  having a wonderful time

Pictures will be posted later.


From the front to back we have Nancy (Youngatheart) Ellen (Elvan) & Donna (DJMurray)

And in the picture below, we have Nancy (Skygirl) in the middle.

the manager left for the night and took the key to the room that the router is in so they couldn't get the router reset and DJ has an I pad but can't upload photos to the site from it so she emailed the pictures to me. to post :-)  That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

I guess I had a "special" quit. I had no knowledge whatsoever of what I was doing my first two weeks.

Why, I guess because I just let it happen naturally. I didn't even set a date until 4 days before because I hadn't yet made a committment to quit.

The month before I quit, a friend asked me if I would quit to influence his brother. I didn't answer. When I got up to leave later he asked me in a different way, he asked if I would consider it. I said I would

During the next four weeks I just began talking to myself before I would smoke. I just said "I'll wait awhile."

The time between smokes gradually went from 10 minutes to 4+ hours. In four weeks I had gone from a pack a day to 5 a day and never denied myself once.

Not denying myself and thus not forming a negative opinion of how hard quitting would be was, I believe, the secret of my quit.

So you see, it really is what you think and how you approach it.

By the end of the fourth week I had proven to myself I didn't need to smoke just because I had an urge to smoke.

That Friday at the mini mart counter where I bought my smokes was when I decided I would buy my last pack and as New Years  was the first of the week, I decided to quit the day after New Years.

I woke up that morning, went outside under the "smoking tree" and had my last smoke at 7:15.

I had decided to use the patch so 3 hours later, I went to the pharmacy and bought a box and came home and slapped one on.

I am a musician and love playing guitar along with all kinds of music so my first two weeks were spent at my friends house 10 hours a day doing that. I don't know if you have the opportunity to do something you love and stay busy with that but it certainly got me through my first two weeks. I highly recommend it.

I quit on a Tuesday. I forgot to wear my patch that Friday and when I got antsy thinking about it I went out in the patio and it struck me funny that something could be so controlling but, that it was as simple as laughing it off to make it dissipate. My first two weeks, I laughed every time I got an urge to smoke. It became automatic. I was already at my friends house, I decided to just go without it, after all, I knew the patches were 10 minutes away so why panic? I am a need to know guy, the guy who takes stuff apart to see how it works. The next morning I felt a little shaky so I put a patch on.

The latter part of the next week, I forgot to put the patch on two days in a row, I figured I didn't need it any longer. This proved to be true. Now that I was off the patch I wanted to learn what to watch out for. I wanted to learn all I could about the quitting process. So I did. I joined a quit smoking website and I asked questions of those who had been quit awhile and I never looked back. I kept a patch in my wallet my first year with the promise I woud put it on and wait an hour rather than smoke a cigarette.

Yes I had some difficult days just like most of you have or will have but I stuck it out. The more I learned the more I was convinced it was a process and I wasn't going to make it any more than that.

My page is about that process. I've spent a lot of time watching all the new people for the past 8 years, what they've written, what they are feeling, if they made it, if not when they dropped out and my page is a compilation of what I've seen and what I wish I knew when I first quit.

The only way out is through but, there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Hang On!

If everyone believed they could not quit smoking simply because they knew or heard of someone who could not quit smoking.......


This is the brainwashing about quitting we heard our whole lives.

I'm not buying into it. It's just plain backward thinking.



You can put quitting off until you are dead or, you can stand up and say NO MORE! and reclaim what's left of a better quality of life!



Posted by jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007 Apr 21, 2015

Give it an inch it'll take a mile and steal your breath with an empty smile

Stink up your hair, yellow your finger, burn holes in your clothes without even thinking

What do you have? What do you give? What draws us close to your grey wispy shiv?

We’ve been asleep, accepting your truth but now is the time we are choosing to live.

Open those eyes, take back your life. You have control if you’ll only decide!

We’ll show you how, give you the tools, you can begin to make smoking the fool

My mom taught me to turn my head when I got a shot. I "got it" the fist time. :-)

After that, I rarely even knew when they actually gave me the shot.

Everyone here who says "you can do it" and "stick with it" has typically made it through the beginning of the process and is encouraging you to do the same.

Look beyond the confusion and temporary discomfort. When the nicotine has dissipated from your system, you are only unlearning something you've done so many times that you don't feel right not doing it. Don't turn it into more than that.

Believe you can do it and get through it!

Onward and Upward!

RAIN it's something we don't get much of in California.

I counted 16 simultaneous live video streams of storm chasers last night. If you don't like one, you can choose another.

It's your choice. It's just like quitting smoking.

Finding things you enjoy and that keep your mind occupied and the dopamine flowing after you've quit is essential to keep growing your quit so you are not focusing on smoking.

If you like road trips, storm chasing is often very relaxing. Many have sound so you feel like you're siiting right there in the front seat, listening to the engine, watching the hail and rain. They find a good vantage point and park and just let you watch the power and the light shows the weather puts on.

This is storm season in the midwest. They go from Texas on up through Oklahoma and Kansas and on up to Illinois.

it's free if you're online. no advertising. very relaxing.

Once you have DECIDED to quit, it isn't so much about how you quit but about honoring your decision.


The core belief we all must come to in order to be free of smoking for life is smoking a cigarette does not solve any problem whether at work, home, at the scene of an accident, saying goodbye at the grave of someone you love, your wife or partner walking out on you or losing your job. Cigarettes aren't going to fix it.


Getting to the place of having that belief is more important than any method each of us comes up with for ourselves to get us started. True freedom from smoking is getting to that place of understanding.


So I say eat broccoli.


You can buy it fresh or you can buy it frozen.


Cook it in a pot, or bake it in the oven


Add a little cheese, use a little butter


IT WILL KEEP YOUR QUIT. Believe and you won't falter!


(reach for the understanding and you can skip the gas)


[Edited by MarkImage is removed pursuant to our DMCA Notice and Policy.]

de·ci·sion    "a conclusion or resolution reached after consideration."

waf·fle        "failure to make up one's mind."

Which will it be?

You can't succeed until you decide you won't waffle.

Try the pancakes instead!

Look Beyond The Moment

it will pass

      Venice California 2004  
      An owner trying to make improvements and flip a house hires unlicensed contractors with no knowledge of building codes to make improvements on the rear building of the property. She has them redo the 2nd and 3rd floors of the rear building without any permits and then has them strip the inside walls of the front house and gets caught by the city. As she had done demo and opened up the walls of the front house, code required that EVERYTHING be brought up to todays standards. They hired me because I was a hands on carpenter/licensed contractor. It was up to me to fix the mess.  
      Here's a link to the whole project with pictures of the before and after.  
      After we had the front house nearly done the city notified the owner that the two buildings qualified as separate residences and we had to create more parking or connect the two units effectively making it a single family residence.,  
     2 Options: 
    1 Remove the back downstairs garage wall and create a niche for parking BETWEEN the two buildings. The cost to engineer and restructure a 3 story building with both downstairs long walls gone and thus their shear value missing, will be well over $100k.    The other drawback is there can be no garden area due to the access of the turning radius required for a car to get to that space.



2 Connect The Buildings To Make It One Residence

Problems: The buildings don't line up. (they are offset) They are at different elevations. There is a stairwell in the rear building that cannot be changed. There is a window on the other side of the normal ridge location.

   They hired an architect to come up with a way to connect the buildings. His vision of the final result was very awkward and expensive and was dismissed.
   My Solution: Skew the ridge off center so the rafters don't impinge on the headroom of the rear buildings stair opening, (which can't be changed) and narrow but not remove the window opening so you retain the morning light on the second floor of the rear building.

Another problem before construction:

The engineer wants 5 steel columns and pads which will cost $5k each as I will have to have a welder come out at $85 and hour due to the different heights which will not be able to be determined except in the field. (one wall rises while the other side falls)
Solution: As the buildings did not line up, there was an 18" jog outside the bottom of the rear stairs. (see (see the forms jog in picture 1, above) I suggested an 18" engineered wall (ready made) . The engineer calced it out and everything worked. That saved 20K+

PS: I installed all hardware required for earthquakes but kept it hidden as much as possible for aesthetics.

Total cost including $10,000 for the cost of commercial roof materials, $35-40k

We then had to remove and replace all the work on the second and third floors of the rear building at additional costs because none of it was to code specifications.


Get your head outside the old smoking box simply by making little changes that remind you  are making a change.

Value these changes instead of bemoaning that you can't continue killing yourself and you will receive a better outcome.

A number of people post here about a smoking dream they had where they've awakened feeling like they had smoked, perhaps even with the sense of smell or taste involved.

Can you recall how many smoking dreams you've had since you quit smoking?

How long have you been quit?



I recall having one in my first month.

1. They dwell on the thought of SMOKING until they talk themselves into it

2. They drink alcohol and then talk themselves into it.

There is no pack of cigarettes hunting you down and, the corner store isn't going to chauffer them to you unless you ask.

Nothing will stick a cigarette in your mouth, light it and squeeze you like an accordian except YOU.

If you feel like you are heading down that slope,

you can shock your senses to stop it quickly.

1. Bite into a lemon skin and all

2. Stick your head in the freezer and count to 20

3. Stick your head under the cold water tap

4. Pack your mouth with ice cubes and try to not get brain freeze.

This guy learned how to stop a crave. The fun begins at 1:30

I have to have fasting bloodwork done soon and I was looking at the instructions:

It says to not smoke.

I didn't know that so I'm even more thankful that

"I don't do that anymore"

more if you are playing at it.

Not much fun playing at it from what I see.


Quitting won't kill you. SMOKING WILL!

Yes there will be some clouded "brain fog" moments but if you know they are coming, you can plan for them. Think ahead.  "I'm going here today, how might my quit become at risk? and "What is my exit strategy to retain my quit?"

I was a carpenter/and licensed general contractor after I left the road as a singer/guitarist in many groups.

My dad was a carpenter. I worked with him building and installing cabinets from the time I was 8 years old. FYI, My user name is shortened version of my old company name, Jones Carpentry.

When we build a gate, we always install a cable and turnbuckle so when the gate sags (and they all do after time) it can be adjusted without rebuilding the whole gate.

Is planning ahead and thinking of things to do before something happens making sense to you? Find and install your turnbuckles before your quit sags, ok?


No one needs to apologize for what I say.

The truth is not argumentative or harsh. People who believe the truth is offensive are bull shi**ers who have failed at this again and again.

Not much creedence there

You want to live or you want to die from smoking and/or live a miserable end of life?

That's what the truth comes down to and where the rubber meets the road.

Have you ever heard "The truth will set you free"?

It was an illusion. A lie we told ourselves over and over and over.

To continue smoking is as logical as....

Let's make our own rules that say it's ok to smoke "every once in awhile" just for "old times sake".

And let's have pride in it!

Hell, we all did it. May as well enjoy testing the waters every now and again, right?

I don't encourage this type of quitting.


Many of us are prime examples of things that can go wrong if you smoke for a long time.

Do you want to retain what's left of your health? Halt some of the damage you are doing?

You can stop smoking or you can join the smokers infirmary and get it "first hand."

Your decision.


If you've quit smoking and you are still smokin, you are doing it wrong.

If you are here long enough and often enough you will see a pattern.

People who are fighting with themselves to smoke or not smoke usually drop off the grid within the first 3 or 4 months.

Saying you want something while putting a knife in your own back isn't walking the talk.

It takes time to unlearn something you've done hundreds of thousands of times.

Be patient, be willing but also, be prepared to give it the time it takes without talking yourself back into smoking.

You must make it through the first 130 days to make it a year..

Evidently monkey's are eating the fibre optic cables because they taste good and taking down India's internet.

Who would'a thought?

Keep Smart!

Talk yourself OUT OF IT 

NOT into it!

"I don't do that anymore."

Don't Smoke It Up!

Filter Blog

By date: By tag: