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All People > jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007 > jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007 Blog > 2009 > July
2009
In a hospital's Intensive Care Unit, patients always died
In the same bed, on Sunday morning, at about 11:00 am ,
Regardless of their medical condition.

This puzzled the doctors and some even thought it had
Something to do with the supernatural. No one could solve
T he mystery as to why the deaths occurred around 11:00 am
Sunday, so a worldwide team of experts was assembled to
Investigate the cause of the incidents.

The next Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11:00 am. ,
All of the doctors and nurses nervously waited outside
The ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon
Was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer
Books, and other holy objects to ward off the evil spirits.

Just when the clock struck 11:00 , Peter Johnson, the part-
Time Sunday janitor, entered the ward and unplugged the life
Support system so he could use the vacuum cleaner.
:
WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:


Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple
creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding
plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be
President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a
water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you
the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another
gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to
stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $3500 Tux rental-$75. People never
stare at your chest when you're talking to them. New shoes don't cut,
blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about
tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all
your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of
thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be
your friend.

Your underwear is $3.99 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more
than enough . You almost never have strap problems in public. You are
unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its
original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You
only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of shoes --
one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs
look. You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of
choice concerning growing a moustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25
minutes.

No wonder men are happier.


Google It
If It Doesn't Fit, ........You Musta Quit.


Don't substitute a half gallon of ice cream for each cigarette not smoked.




Waving......

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