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Night owl checking in with 7 DOF

alysonoholic
Member
3 23 206

I am so very glad it's Friday, y'all. I 100% feel like I have a cold; I'm pretty well exhausted and completely congested with a sore/scratchy throat, plus my brain is totally muddled. I've got medicine for night or day, tissues, nasal spray, chicken noodle soup, kombucha, watermelon juice and I'm pretty sure I can make it through the weekend without having to leave my home, thank goodness. 

That being said, despite finding myself quietly muttering "ugh, I'm dyiiiiing" under my breath throughout the day, I'm not actually miserable...I know this is all part of the journey on the right path. I had the occasion to read some of my oldoldold posts today and I truly felt like a complete idiot for having backtracked so far on that road I have been on too many times before. I'm laying on the couch with my gentleman cat, Bread, watching Divorce Court (don't ask me why, I've never been married and I've been single for two and a half years so it clearly makes no sense,) I'm chugging water and I'll probably be in bed reading before the clock hits 10pm BUT I've officially made it one week without a cigarette (again!)

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About the Author
This is actually my third wind on becomeanex.org - in February 2013 I quit for over 6 months before relapsing and realizing I was going to have to start all over again. And then that happened again. So, I'm back here to get at it. I've tried quitting so many times now it's not even that funny. I had basically been smoking since I was 13 (so, 25 years now) and was tired of letting something so stupid and expensive run my life to the extent that it did. In general, I am a pretty healthy person. I work out regularly, I eat well most of the time..it just seemed ridiculous to keep subjecting myself to being stinky and ultimately sick. I know cigarettes don't actually bring anything positive to my life, it was just hard to think of a future that didn't include the habits I had built around them. But now that I am 38 I am determined to live a healthy, well-balanced life and take more time to enjoy my home, my friends, my 2 cats, my city and a life free of cigarettes.