Well, the dog came back home. Today is day four and a mile hike down the river let me know why I quit smoking. Fifteen years ago I was fit, firm and tough. Now I am just very determined to quit smoking. Hopefully the fit, firm and tough will come back soon.
I had a revelation this evening after I received a strange phone call from a friend. January when I vowed to make changes in my life, I knew it wasn't going to be easy. Of course at the time I didn't realize I would be making those changes while trying...No there is no trying to it, while I QUIT smoking.
All I can say is, "Yes, everybody is right when they say life is short." Well the rest of my life, no matter how many years I have left belong to me. I will be in control of my life. Nothing, emotions, cigarettes, and no one, family, friends, lovers, will take control of my life.
I truly appreciate all the encouragement from everyone out there, friends, family and strangers alike. Yesterday was difficult. Well, today wasn't as hard. I figure that each day will get easier, even if there will be days when it will be very difficult. Today when the old craving came around I thought of all my plans for the future. I went over all my dreams, wishes and desires and with each one I realized that no matter what, if I follow through and make even a fraction of those happen, I can't do it if I'm slowly destroying my health with smoke.
As for the dog, well, she is still my best friend. I stick by my own philosophy, "If I had know 35 years ago what I know now I would have bought two dogs and never had a husband or children." Well husband's been gone eight years. (Ironically he went to buy cigars and never came home.) My son is grown. My life is my own and I WILL take it back. "Cigarettes, bite the dust."
Everybody out there who is quitting go outside and stand on your porch, balcony, in your yard and look up at the moon and the stars and know WE CAN BEAT IT.
Now, when I wake up in the morning let's see if I am as cocky and certain. Maybe I will be and maybe I won't. Maybe the dog will stick around with me all day, and maybe she will run off. One thing I know for sure. I will not smoke.