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All People > TomW5.15.17 > TomW5.15.17's Blog > 2018 > October

Happy National Cat Day!

Posted by TomW5.15.17 Oct 29, 2018

I can't believe I used to dump her off my lap so I could go out to the garage and smoke.  Now she can stay as long as she likes

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Speaking of spouses...

Posted by TomW5.15.17 Oct 27, 2018

Mine had her annual physical yesterday.  Our Doc asked her if I was still an ex-smoker.  My wife said yes, and our Doc told her to pass along how proud she was!  I’m way past the point of needing frequent encouragement, but I have to say it felt nice.  I haven’t seen her since my physical last January.  In fact, with the exception of a mild cold a few weeks ago, I have not been sick since I quit in May 2017!  I’m feeling a little “Ex”tra grateful to be an “Ex”er today !

I’ve only had a handful of smokemares since I quit a year and a half ago.  But until last night, they all had similarities:

  1. I was aware that I had relapsed, but thought I could hide it.
  2. I felt terribly guilty for relapsing.
  3. I woke up in a panic, feeling extreme shame for what I had done.
  4. Even though I could tell I was in my bed, and I had only been dreaming, I still immediately smelled my fingers just to be sure.

Last night’s was different:

  1. I didn’t consider my smoking a relapse, because I was only bumming menthol cigarettes from a friend. And since I never smoked menthol before, and would never go buy a pack of menthol in the future, somehow, this didn’t count.
  2. Then, another friend pointed out the flaw in my logic, and I woke up just as I realized he was right.
  3. This time when I woke up, I immediately knew it was a dream and laughed instead of panicking and smelling my fingers. Why? Because I really never would smoke a menthol no matter how bad a withdrawal urge I was having.  Ick!  No offense, but I don’t know how you previous menthol smokers did it. I would (and did) drive more than a mile to buy a pack of regular cigarettes before bumming a menthol.