Why did I smoke before I was addicted to Nicotine? Acceptance! A way to cover up my Vulnerability, Self Doubt, lack of Self Esteem. I had to get away from what I was feeling, to numb the pain, the emptiness, the disillusionment. I had to hide the True me in a smoke cloud!
But Addiction came with a trade-off whether I knew it or not! I lost sight of my true Creator-based Essence - the experience of absolute Freedom and Joy of being my Authentic Self. Due to all the things I had been through in my life, it became hidden from view. It was still there beneath layers of self doubt, resentment and frustration, accumulated through the disappointments and traumas of a lifetime. It hadn’t gone anywhere; I simply became distracted, so accustomed to looking outside of myself for completion that I forgot where to find it.
And because I lost touch with my True Self I stopped Loving Myself! I didn’t even know what it meant to Love Myself or where to begin!
Then August 5, 2013 I met somebody - here at this site!
Sharon a.k.a Smorgy8513
https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/people/smorgy8513
I didn’t know that my Life was about to change! Like all new relationships this one grew tentatively and I discovered not only her – I discovered me!
Sharon took my hand and showed me what it means to search for Self Compassion. She helped me to form the correct questions that led to the right answers that led me into a stronger Quit Journey than I ever imagined possible!
Sharon did something amazing! She led by EXample into a place of Vulnerability! Oh, what an awesome concept! I quake at the thought of it!
She showed me that Self Love starts with Self Acceptance. In order to Love Yourself, you must embrace the parts of yourself that you reject. Resentment, jealousy, anger, shame; it is by loving these parts of yourself that you will become Free of them.
True strength came to me when I discovered the power of Vulnerability.
Vulnerability is something I would avoid at all costs. It is the worst place I would want to put myself in, and certainly not something I would actively seek!
Sharon made herself Vulnerable and taught me to do the same.
She led me to Self Compassion. I finally became my own Best Friend!
She demonstrated that there is great power to be found in Vulnerability; the power of Truth. When you are Vulnerable, you are being Real. You are showing yourself exactly as you are.
When you dare to be Vulnerable, you step outside your comfort zone, into the unknown. You let go of control, you confront the fear of rejection, and you put your own Truth above the need to please others. Vulnerability is the ultimate act of Self Love, it is the key to breaking addiction, codependency and releasing the flimsy crutch of outside approval.
In fact, Love of Self is the only way to permanently heal any Addiction. If we don’t learn Self Love we will simply shift from one Addiction to another. Cutting away the leaves of a habit is not the solution; new foliage will grow back soon enough. If you want to be free of Addiction, you have to heal the root. Go inwards and fill the emptiness with Love. Then your Addictions will fall away by themselves, for there will be no hole left for them to fill.
This is the Gift that Sharon offered me!
“Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends.” John 15:13
Today I honor Sharon and the Gift of Self Love that she handed me!
There are no words sufficient to express my Gratitude!
Thank You, my Friend, for showing me the Power of Self Love!
Please join us and learn more about Self Love:
https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/positive-affirmations-and-support
https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/thread/3533-love-yourself
