Thomas3.20.2010

Irony!

Blog Post created by Thomas3.20.2010 on Nov 13, 2014

I went to the Doctor with all kinds of symptoms. After many blood tests, it was discovered that I had been ingesting arsenic! WHEW! No wonder I haven't been feeling well! Thank God I went to the Doctor before it killed me! I will recover but it will take a long time, he said. Then he absolutely shocked me! This "Doctor" said that getting off of the arsenic too rapidly would be bad for me and that I would have to wear arsenic patches with just a little arsenic in it until my body could get used to the fact that I wasn't poisoning myself anymore! WHAT?! 

"You want me to poison myself slooooowly instead of quickly? Doesn't that still kill me in the end?" asked I. "Oh, no, sir! This is just a little arsenic! It will continue to make you sick, but not as sick as you are now and as long as you eventually stop using it, it won't kill you," he said with a reassuring smile. "And if I don't stop using it?" The Doctor looked me in the eye and said, "Well, of course, there is that risk since arsenic is addictive. But my guess is that you'll get tired of feeling sick all of the time and eventually stop." Angrily, I looked directly back at him and said, "You're a QUACK! You just want my money so that I can continue to kill myself but not notice it as much!" And I stomped out yelling behind me, "And don't even think about billing me for this 'consult!' You're pathetic! What happened to the hypocratic oath?"

Do you see where I'm going with this, folks? Fortunately, this is just a story. But change up Arsenic for Nicotine and you get the picture! Nicotine is insecticide! IT KILLS!

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