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2016
SkyGirl

1492 Days Ago

Posted by SkyGirl Dec 8, 2016

1492 days ago, I had my Quit Day all planned out.

I'm a flight attendant, based in DC and had traded into a long downtown layover in Seattle, with plans to meet My Beloved for a celebratory night.  

BUT...I screwed up.  Big time.  I had read all the recommended reading.  I had done all the practice runs without cigarettes.  I had done all the tracking exercises.  I thought I was READY.

On the morning of my Quit Day, I overslept and missed my flight.  I woke up, felt like **** and immediately drove to the 7/11, bought a pack of cigarettes and smoked them, while feeling like a complete failure of a human being.

I blogged about my failure and the way I hated myself.  I got a lot of responses.  The most pointed one was from Dale and called me out about purposely sabotaging myself. He was probably right.  Thank you, dear friend, for not letting me get away with anything...

However, the one response that stood out was from Owlfeather:

"I want  to see you stop smoking in such a big way.  I can see such a butterfly there suffocating"

I am not, nor have I ever been, a butterfly.  But the idea that someone so wonderful like Owlfeather could ever see me that way??  

I was inspired and I was determined after that.   Three days later, I quit.  Forever.  You don't need anyone to help you quit.  But it really helps.  And I will be here for ANYONE who needs a boost, a song, a story, an anything to keep them strong.  I promise to help.  Just never be afraid to ASK for help.

xoxoxo,   Sky