I've been gone from EX for just three days and when I started reading all the new blogs last night, there were a lot of new folks I didn't recognize. I wanted so much to go back and comment on all the blogs of Newbies to give them encouragement.
But blogs get buried SO quickly here and by the time I'd gone back about eight pages worth of blogs and STILL not reached older blogs I'd read before I had to leave...well, I knew that it was unrealistic to try to comment on all the Newbie's blogs.
While reading the wonderful blogs of Newbies, I got to thinking about my own blogs when I was a Newbie. And how I remembered seeing those folks that were up to Day 50 ,60, 70? Well, they had it MADE, right?
They must have been CHARMED to get that far, right? They must have ALWAYS had the confidence to quit pretty easily, right? People who have been quit for THAT long? They couldn't POSSIBLY have EVER felt the way a Newbie truly feels, right? HAH...
Here is a reprint of a blog I posted when I was first here on EX, just last September. I didn't print the "Comments" section, but if you like, you can go back and read all the comments people made if you go to my Blog History and check out pages 11-12. Some of the folks who commented are some of my best friends now. And so you see, dear Newbies, we DO understand how you feel when you first get here. And we DO want to know you and support you and love you... Welcome, Newbies!!!
"Okay, I must preface this blog by saying I know this is probably an unwarranted feeling, but I guess if you feel something then this is probably a very safe place to talk about it. I am coming up on my quit date; just five days from now. And I know I have posted blogs that talk about how I am SOOOO prepared for it and planning how to handle it. But, in reality, I'm worried. I'm nervous. I don't know HOW I'm going to feel on that first day. I've read everything that you've all recommended. I'm seriously preparing (see previous posts), but here's what I'm actually feeling: You guys all seem to know each other so well and for so long. You guys all seem like such good friends. You share addresses of people who need special help (which is SO amazing that you have developed such relationships!). You all seem to know so much about each other. And I feel like an outsider and almost like an intruder. Like the new kid holding a lunch tray in the cafeteria who walks up and says, "Can I sit with you?" NOBODY HERE IS MAKING ME FEEL LIKE THAT. Everyone here is being SO welcoming and wonderful! It's ME who is worried about pushing my needy self into a place where all the good friends here might be saying, "Oh shheeesh, it's that Fly Girl again...and she hasn't even QUIT yet!" I had NO idea that I was so insecure until I got to a point in my life where I needed some real serious ongoing support for something I haven't been able to master in my life... Is this making sense to any of you "veterans" or should I just make an appointment with a therapist?????"
