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Share your quitting journey

Day Ten: Having a bit of a hard time again.

SkyGirl
Member
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Woke up wanting a cigarette with my coffee today.  Didn't do it, because I don't give myself access to cigarettes and because I don't intend to smoke no matter what.. BUT, it was another moderately-frantic day.  Helped Jeff with the hotel guests and then went driving up the coast.  My brain is telling me that I want, that I NEED. that I CAN'T go on without a cigarette. Oh,YEAH????  YES. I CAN.  Because, as usual, I am smarter than the lies my brain is telling me.  I do NOT need a nicotine refill.  It is DAY TEN for for me.  I am gonna start counting my TOES tomorrow because I'm out of fingers after today.  How cool is that?  Oh.  Oh.  Oh. But I'd love to find someone with a cigarette tonight and borrow it and have a puff.  But I WON"T.  And I'm really really really really really really proud of myself that the opportunity is there and that my desire to be a non-smoker is greater. It sounds so easy, but I'm crying now and Jeff is patting my back and he's also saying, "can we PLEASE go home and have ice cream instead of worrying about smokng?  We'll go home and scratch lottery cards and think about replacement behaviors, Darling..."  What a guy.  I'm a not a loser unless I pick up another cigarette.  Which I WON'T.

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About the Author
I'm a 64 year-old flight attendant for a major US airline. Prior to that, I owned an ice cream store and six hot dog carts and put my five kids thru college on hot dog earnings! Prior to THAT, I was Director of International Administration for Domino's Pizza, Inc. I was married to my H.S. sweetheart (dad of my 5 kids) for 17 years. I've been with Jeff for 23 years, but we just finally got married in 2016! Jeff & I live in Cape Meares, OR right on the beach. I'm from Ann Arbor, MI, where many of my kids/relatives still live. My flying base is Washington, DC, where I have a condo that I stay in when I'm between flying trips. My dream is to retire and stay home with Jeff and my two cats, Kenneth & Barbara...not happening soon, though. So I go home whenever I can get a week or more off. I LOVE to meet up with other EXers in the cities where I lay over. I usually blog about what cities I'm laying over in, so let me know if I'm staying near you! I'll buy dinner!! Xxxooo, Sky