cancel
Showing results for 
Show  only  | Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Share your quitting journey

Day Seven, Part II: Basket Case...

SkyGirl
Member
0 15 3

What the hell is WRONG with me today?  I can't even try to be funny anymore today.

I have not smoked.  I will not smoke.  That is not an option.  I am sure of that.

But this has been the hardest day so far.  I might be woman, but I am not roaring.

In fact, I am now sitting in Jeff's office, after a good long crying jag in the car in the parking lot.

I NEVER cry.  I rise to the occasion.  I make people laugh if I can.  I take care of other people.   But I never cry.  Well, ok, menopausal crying.  And sad movie crying.  But not just random emotional crying. 

I have tried everything we talked about in my previous blog today.  I walked, I drove, I shopped, I played on the computer, I made a hair appointment, I browsed antique stores, I planned a nice dinner, I cleaned the car, I read for a while.  Yet this day has been one long crave lurking underneath everything.

It's UNCOMFORTABLE.  I know that's ALL it is.  But I just want to cry, forget the pot roast and go to bed.  This is NOT me.  I don't like it.  I want today to be over.

Done venting.  I think.  I'm sure I'll be cheerful tomorrow...  Wow.  Bad day.  I don't usually let crap whoop my ass.  This is new.  I don't like it.  I will not smoke, no matter what.  Not feeling the victory, though.  Sorry.

15 Comments
About the Author
I'm a 64 year-old flight attendant for a major US airline. Prior to that, I owned an ice cream store and six hot dog carts and put my five kids thru college on hot dog earnings! Prior to THAT, I was Director of International Administration for Domino's Pizza, Inc. I was married to my H.S. sweetheart (dad of my 5 kids) for 17 years. I've been with Jeff for 23 years, but we just finally got married in 2016! Jeff & I live in Cape Meares, OR right on the beach. I'm from Ann Arbor, MI, where many of my kids/relatives still live. My flying base is Washington, DC, where I have a condo that I stay in when I'm between flying trips. My dream is to retire and stay home with Jeff and my two cats, Kenneth & Barbara...not happening soon, though. So I go home whenever I can get a week or more off. I LOVE to meet up with other EXers in the cities where I lay over. I usually blog about what cities I'm laying over in, so let me know if I'm staying near you! I'll buy dinner!! Xxxooo, Sky