SkyGirl

Day Seven, Part II: Basket Case...

Blog Post created by SkyGirl on Oct 3, 2012

What the hell is WRONG with me today?  I can't even try to be funny anymore today.

I have not smoked.  I will not smoke.  That is not an option.  I am sure of that.

But this has been the hardest day so far.  I might be woman, but I am not roaring.

In fact, I am now sitting in Jeff's office, after a good long crying jag in the car in the parking lot.

I NEVER cry.  I rise to the occasion.  I make people laugh if I can.  I take care of other people.   But I never cry.  Well, ok, menopausal crying.  And sad movie crying.  But not just random emotional crying. 

I have tried everything we talked about in my previous blog today.  I walked, I drove, I shopped, I played on the computer, I made a hair appointment, I browsed antique stores, I planned a nice dinner, I cleaned the car, I read for a while.  Yet this day has been one long crave lurking underneath everything.

It's UNCOMFORTABLE.  I know that's ALL it is.  But I just want to cry, forget the pot roast and go to bed.  This is NOT me.  I don't like it.  I want today to be over.

Done venting.  I think.  I'm sure I'll be cheerful tomorrow...  Wow.  Bad day.  I don't usually let crap whoop my ass.  This is new.  I don't like it.  I will not smoke, no matter what.  Not feeling the victory, though.  Sorry.

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