In your opinion am I being just overly confident when I should be cautious? Am I doing both? It feels like I am both on the inside. I think I need to be confident and strong in my quit or else lose it. So I chose confidence over complacent when it comes to being an EX smoker. It makes me feel better about myself to stand firm and to hold onto my forever quit. Is that to presumptuous? I think from previous blogs and responses that I am suppose to be firm. That I should be confident that I will not ever take another puff.
I feel the struggle in my chest. It is tight as a drum. My heart feels like it will beat through my chest if I don't smoke. My body screams,"Smoke. You're wasting your time trying to quit". I even think about them,sickorettes. I can't help it. It is like I am weakening. Now I can stop feeling sorry for myself and I take an active approach to getting rid of all of that. I will walk on the treadmill. I just got the okay yesterday to start back walking on my treadmill, Yahooo!!!! Now I can really start to feel like I am accomplishing something healthy. I have other avenues I want to look into. I want to improve myself for myself.
I have been inch worming back to normal BG blood glucose levels. I have even hit the normal mark several times. So I see the change in food has and is making a difference. I'll keep on until it stays normal most of the time. Nothing is always perfect 
Thanks for listening and please feel free to leave comments...I really can use some advice and guidance from newbies to NMLers to the Elders.
Cathy
13 DOF
