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Share your quitting journey

The worm has turned....

Posamari
Member
0 5 17

Winding up the end of Heck Week, although some days felt like Hell Week. Started out on the patch for first few days, but felt it intensified my anxiety, gave me bizarre nightmares, so cold turkey it became...and I think it was actually easier. I didn't expect the fatigue and depression that came with the quit, but with the support of all of you on the site, TY!TY! I could see light at the end of the tunnel. I appreciate everyone here! I would not have got this far without the support of the site members.  Had a Dr appt yesterday and when I told her I was on day 12 of tobacco free, she smiled and gave me the biggest hug, said how proud she was. She was honestly sincere. Made me feel so good and proud of myself too. I still have the fatigue and the depression comes and goes. I've become more active, which has helped keep the 'blues' at bay.  The first 10 days was basically my reclusive pity party. I couldn't stand myself. I called off work, sat in  bed reading everything I could on nicotine withdrawal and addiction, listened to music, wrote down thoughts, feelings and slept in 3 hour increments around the clock. I had no appetite, and lost weight. My skin started to get very dry too, which I thought was weird. HOWEVER ---I now feel like "I've got this!".  Yay!  I know I'll still have 'down' days but they won't be as frequent. The hardest crave situations is when I eat--- I want a cig so badly I can almost taste it 🙂 and in the morning.  The car hasn't been too bad, which surprised me, but I havent gone any long distances either. I also get crave when I'm excited or nervous which is to be expected. The first episode of the new season of Walking Dead almost did me in--haha, along with the election results. I had a love/hate relationship with my menthol 100s. I loved smoking but at the same time, felt they were bullying me and controlled me. And they were. As I mentioned before, I got pneumonia a few months ago and my health started going downhill rapidly and that gave me the motivation to quit plus going to see my oldest daughter graduate next month. I gave up caffeine a few days before my quit date and reduced my sugar intact by about 60-70%. Instead of coffee in the morning, I'm drinking hot lemon honey water. Oh boy---*eye roll*.  But have to admit, I'm getting used to it. Can't do green tea cos of the caffeine, tried to a few times and my craves were too much. I also haven't had alcohol in close to 2 months.  I tried to eliminate as many triggers I could before quitting and I've avoided almost all social interaction. Now  I'm a drag! No fun Fiona! Debbie Downer! Well, enough of this I told myself this morning!  Tomorrow I will walk first thing in morning, put on music, get my creative juices flowing again and start on a few projects. Heck I may even ride my bike. I refuse to let my quit dictate my mojo anymore. I can quit and still enjoy life! Cigarettes are just not required this time around! 🙂 😉 

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