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2017
Mandolinrain

Checking in

Posted by Mandolinrain Sep 27, 2017

Although I have not been here much as of late, I think of you all often.

 

I am so darn tired. Today I drove two suv loads and 2 haul cargo van loads BY MYSELF to new house. I am so done with the moving thing.  The heat has been near 90's all week and it has me exhausted! I have been taking many breaks and staying hydrated....and this house has so many steps...I sure will not miss those in new house!  I have everything except our clothes and the dishes are still using moved...oh and of course the big furniture that the movers will deal with next weekend. I was worried I would have a relapse with my MS because of the heat, but so far so good

 

Hubby is dealing with the garages and the horse barn, thank goodness. I think I have new muscles that I have never felt ache before in my life, lol. Some friends are helping tomorrow to sort through things and unpack kitchen at new house. 

 

Anyway wanted to let you know I am still around, not smoking and going to bed NOW! AND...FYI...I have read some of the Newbie posts and love seeing they are battling through and keeping their quits intact! Awesome!!!

 

Love and miss you all~ Missy

You might be surprised how many of us elders actually were Serial Quitters. I was.  Here are a few examples of my MANY quits......

 

I made a huge announcement to everyone that such and such date was my quit date....only to find myself sneaking a cigarette now and then and within a few days back to the whole darn pack.

 

I would smoke ten a day and decrease till I was down to one then, be absolutely insane and buy a whole pack at midnight....driving into town, not a short drive by far hoping the only gas station was still open and had my brand.

 

I would feel on a whim to quit...and toss them in the trash after giving them a good dose of water to drown them out only to, well you know...get back in the car and drive into town again...

 

i would come here and read ALITTLE bit and made a few encouraging posts even and quit over 60 days I think once...then fail....come here ...get lectures because poor me, I had not done what the Elders suggested, yet I felt hurt because they were disappointed in me. Well geese, what’s a girl to do?

 

Dont they understand....? I am a busy lady!  I was raising a grandson, ( that should have been enough reason to quit, then, but no).

I had and still do have a disability. Poor poor me. As a former surigacal Asst I know by quitting somoking my disability symptoms will improve...that also was not important at enough.

I have all these horses to care for, classes to teach...I am stressed out!

 

Folks that was then this is now. I’m no dummy.  I am college educated.  Yet I chose to ignore what I needed to do the most and that was the advice given to me when I came here. Thus I was a Serial Quitter.

 

Addiction cares less of our origins , skin color, faith/ beliefs or the amount of money we have or don’t have or the level of education we have.

 

Nicotine Addiction is not simply going to go away on its own without effort on your part to commit to recognizing and APPLYING the tools given to you on this site.

 

Until  I was ready and truly understood how the addiction worked in my brain I was doomed to continue use and  to fail.

 

Good news is you do not have to remain a 'Serial Quitter.' When your sick and tired of being sick and tired you WILL do this the right way and not skip steps and get busy getting busy.

 

So get on with it already.....PLEASE. Your very life depends on it.

 

Have a great weekend and don’t be afraid to feel pain as you quit. Many lost their lives to this rotten addiction and their family members wish they were here to even FEEL. 

 

This is is no joke. Until you take this seriously as though your life depends on it and it does....

your set up for failure...and are a 'Serial Quitter'.

 

PS: When I downloaded the three girls in the pic above, the first one had a bubble that said 'I quit smoking'...for some reason it does not show up.

 

 

Do you feel like you just keep doing the same thing over and over again. Kinda like, you go to bed at night with all the right intentions to quit smoking. Then you wake up and you decide....welll what’s one more day? 

 

Or or maybe you just enjoy re-hashing hell week over and over and over and over again?

 

As much as we sometime want to complicate it, that battle going on in regards to relapsing.....you can certainly take a good bit of the edge off  if FIRST understand the beast, by reading all the suggested material we give you...... Secondly...put on your Armor, be ready to fight for your quit...and Thirdly....be watchful and accountable.

 

OR.....keep on celebrating Groundhog Day over and over and over and over again.

 

Battles are won by being prepared and understanding the enemy and until you understand your addition to Nicotine your going to be chasing your tail for a long time. 

 

Smarten up. Quitting is work, no denying that, we all worked for our quits and we will work to protect them until we breath our last breath, I know I will and I know many of you who take this as seriously as I do and would agree. 

 

You want freedom so it is the same like they say on the battle fields......

Freedom isn’t free....That pertains to us addicts as well.

I promise...all the uncomfortable moments you start out with eventually will diminish ...Freedom is waiting on the other side.

....now go get what’s yours! You are worth it.

 

Goodnight

Mandolinrain

DAY 1112 Check in

Posted by Mandolinrain Sep 18, 2017

Howdy, am stopping by to say hello. We are 18 days from the big move and things are moving along nicely. I just wanted to pop in and say hello.

 

I miss you guys ( very much) and will be back in daily routine check ins sometime soon after the move.

 

Things are hectic but in a good way. Things are getting done.  I have acquired more junk in our 38 years together than I ever imagined,lol. So have made many trips to Hospice and Goodwill to donate items. Great feeling really. 

 

Smoking is not an option. I have 1112 DOF and NOTHING will take that from me. I worked to hard to get it.

 

So heres my thought for the day...If things aren't going right, go left.

 

N.O.P.E.~Missy

Mandolinrain

Hiatus from Ex for awhile

Posted by Mandolinrain Sep 11, 2017

So finally the time has arrived and the move is just s few weeks away. The Movers arrive to load up this house on the 6th of October and then deliver to the new house on the 7th.

 

Meanwhile major packing is going on and I am going to start to take smaller things over to new house by end of this week. I have not even started in the horse barn and not looking forward to that, ugh!!!

 

Therefore I will be absent from here for awhile. I may pop in for a quick look in the evenings now and then, just depends, theres so much I have to do. 

 

I WILL KEEP PROTECTING MY QUIT, NO WORRIES THERE! I serve an AWESOME GOD who I spend time with often to help keep me in check and my hubby of nearly 38 years who also is my champion and best friend.

 

Love all of you and will be back full time after the move and the internet is up and running.

 

xoxoMissy- 1105 DOF

Mandolinrain

Expect the unexpected

Posted by Mandolinrain Sep 4, 2017

Are you expecting Joy or trouble? Pleasant feelings or Pain? Smiles or frowns?

Of course some things in life are truly out of our control BUT....

For the most part do you feel you can perhaps look for the Joy the pleasant feelings and the smiles, just for today?

 

Instead of looking for ways to make you sad or dwell on whats not going right in your life, can you focus on this very instant. This second. Smile...a big smile.

 

What are the good things you have going for you right this minute?

 

   Sometimes I need to step back from my troubles, my pain and quit frowning.

It seems for me anyway, the more effort I put into those things, the more of it I receive. back.

 

I don't miss smoking like used to. I always worried I would miss it so much. I think it misses me more than I miss it.

 

Today I am choosing this minute, this second ...I CHOOSE, to be happy, unmoved by circumstances out of my control. I smile as I think of so many of you in here that have touched my heart in so many good ways I can't  count them all.

I count my blessings, I cherish good memories from my past and the bad ones, well...they are there but they don't control me. I don't give them that leverage anymore.I use them as teachable lessons, so I have learned.

 

Are you looking today for something you expect? Such as words to ease a troubled heart, compassion from someone who is not ready to give it to you? Are you expecting the craves to diminish on this particular day for any particular reason?

 

Don't expect so much. I have learned to keep my expectations tiny therefore I am a bit less winey.

 

Reach out to someone else. Theres always someone who is hurting. Help them. It will release your own expectations and fill you up with a happy heart. Don't expect anything in return, just do it.

 

Don't focus on the cigarette you are wanting this second so bad. Don't feed the Nicodemon. Find something to focus on that makes your heart sing. Make a list , 

What makes your heart sing? Then take action.

 

The unexpected can also bring you Joy , pleasant feelings and happiness. Maybe we all could look forward in a more positive light . Its worth a try.

 

 

I am happy about that. I was a very stubborn quitter, but I finally dug in my heels and fought through the tuff times ( oh yes, many of those) but because of the knowledge I learned from this site and all of you...I applied that knowledge and it stuck. Yea me...three years. I see other smokers and feel sorry for them and they want what I have. They feel it is impossible to stop because they have failed so many times. I felt that way to. Never would have imagined I would have this wonderful freedom.

So thank you EX and everyone here. I could not have done this without God and Ex. Simply put....I love you guys, old and new...I learn from you all and I intend to remain teachable. Have a safe and happy weekend. I'll be back next week.  Busy weekend planned for us, but all good. Thank you ALL for getting me to 3 years of freedom.

 

xoxoMissy