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Mandolinrain Blog

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Mandolinrain

ME-ME- ME

Posted by Mandolinrain Dec 10, 2019

Taking care of me

Is why I have not be around

Im doing good though

Healthy -save and sound

 

Taking care of me

its a busy time of year

Holidays are lurking

But I am filled with Christmas cheer

 

Taking care of me

So I don't hit overdrive

Im no good to anyone

When I throw myself aside

 

I'll make more time for Ex

Once the Seasons past

But you can bet I will protect my quit

For that will always last

 

 

 

I will be more active after Holidays)

xoxoMissy

 

 

Mandolinrain

Recharging

Posted by Mandolinrain Nov 22, 2019

Thats what my almost 2 year old twins grand-daughters are doing now. They have been here for 2 days and go home tomorrow.

 

I like to use the word recharging because when they wake up they are full of energy and bursting at the seems to get into everything all over again and scream…and wow do they scream, but they are so fun…..

 

Then a few hours later, thats when the tears and fighting begin. They are also starting to get very good at saying NO to everythng.when they are tired which got me to thinking…

 

EX SMOKERS should too

.

So a little Nana advice…..if your tired just say NO and go take a nap. When you ‘recharge’, all will look better. Tired people need to say NO more often :)

 

I'm tired and going to bed when they do tonight around 8-8:30…and I won’t have any trouble saying NO to that

I will just be re charging

Mandolinrain

Is FEAR holding you back?

Posted by Mandolinrain Nov 16, 2019

Fear has caused its share of damage to many a good quit. It may bring forth intimidation, lack of reason, lack of courage...it makes us weak in our compromises, choices and excuses. It truly can manifest in so many ways.

 

What ways has it interfered with your own quit now or in the past and what do you do or have you done to to recognize it now and get past it?

 

Myself....I pray first. I remind myself I am never alone unless I choose to be. I go to the God of my understanding first then I come here if I feel my quit being threatened.

 

Fear truly hurt me in my early quit until I understood that it was the addiction talking in me head. Fear wanted fed and it wanted me to surrender to it completely. Fear told me I would never be able to relax and enjoy myself again if I quit and THAT was probably the biggest lie it ever told to me. I had several failed quits at first until I came to really grasp the addiction and the truth about fear.

So again....how did FEAR relate to your quit and how to you overcome ?

Happy Saturday Everyone

 

 

Mandolinrain

The Pain of Change

Posted by Mandolinrain Nov 9, 2019

The only way out is through

 

Accept the hardship and get busy getting busy

Have some cheese with your wine

If you keep doing what your doing...`HELLO'...you will keep getting the same result.

WOW-Mind blowing information

If not ~ maybe you need to readjust your attitude

Worked for me anyway-just a thought........

 

OR...you can keep going around the same ole mountain....FYI,,,the view is the same.

 

Better yet.....Accept that yes  , you will endure some difficult moments , but POWER THOUGH THEM.

 

IT IS YOUR CHOICE

IT CAN BE DONE

IT IS WORTH IT......

 

I PROMISE YOU...FREEDOM IS YOURS TO HAVE NO MATTER HOW HOPELESS YOU FEEL NOW OR HOW LONG YOU HAVE BEEN AN ADDICT TO NICOTINE.

 

Think of it this way if you must.....if you had a child and they were stuck in a horrible situation but it was within your power to stop it...of course you would do whatever to takes to keep your child safe,

 

YOU are the child.

Keep yourself safe~whatever it takes, okay?

 

PS: I mean this all in a friendly way.....I know it's hard to quit. Terribly hard. Sometimes though it's necessary to ' go through' uncomfortable circumstances to get the results we desire.

 

 

Peace out

We all do or rather thought that we did at one time early in our quit or before we quit.

Personally, for example, I thought smoking was my motivator, my internal massage for stress relief, my courage, my friend.....and the list goes on.

 

 

 

Only when I understood the technical part of addiction was I able to see past what I THOUGHT I loved doing................ ( smoking) for the various reasons listed above as well as several not listed AND because I just THOUGHT  I LOVED to smoke.

 

Dig deep into your reasons then dig deep into all the knowledge offered on this site and though books such as Alan Carrs THE EASYWAY TO STOP SMOKING, so that you can truly see for yourself the truth and how your brains receptors have been holding you back from it from the moment you smoked your first one.

 

Then my friend you will be on the road to true freedom, and let me tell you you, it’s mighty fine.

(That  coming from a gal who smoked over 30 years and never thought it would be possible for me to stop and feel as good as I do today.

 

Have a great smoke free weekend everyone!

 

~Missy 

5 years 2 months and 6 days free ( Or something like that )

Mandolinrain

Update on me

Posted by Mandolinrain Oct 19, 2019

I'm doing better but vision is still blurry. I try to get on here and read a little everyday but its hard to see after awhile.

 

I did start painting again  and even that's a challenge. I hate this. I know its temporary, but still.

 

I have not forgotten you all and I will be back as soon as I can. Meanwhile know I am reading as much as I can here and thinking of you all often. I see so many NEWBIES, WOW! Thats so awesome! Can't wait to meet you all. I'm supporting in a silent way for now though. Larger print helps

 

Vision improves a tiny bit each day so long as I don't overstay on computer, so time on Ex, texting and email..... is limited for now.

 

Blessings and N.O.P.E. to all ~Missy

Mandolinrain

WHY THIS SITE

Posted by Mandolinrain Oct 10, 2019

WHY THIS SITE?

 

Why di I care…cause someone did for me

why do I encourage because someone di for me

why do i come here most days after days…yes, , because someone did for me

 

You can choose to be a part of something good ( ex) and help others as you have been helped

 

You can make new friends on the way.Friends teach us things that water our life and bring new growth…maybe about gardening, about family about love  or maybe just letting someone know your care and are thinking about them…is al. Is enough

 

We keep areas on this site to do that…its open to all and although perhaps not related to nicotine addiction, it reminds us we are human….and builds our trust and friendships

 

Sorry for typos, blurry eyes.

 

Im doing great. Im not smoking and thanks to the persistent Exers on this site of which would not exist without them. Im glad your here and I am grateful to be a part of such a magnificent site. Thats why

Thank you

Mandolinrain

More complicated

Posted by Mandolinrain Sep 27, 2019

They say it happens 3's. WHO are 'They',??? I' d like to have a word with them.

 

As though things can't be tuff enough, our daughter in laws mom, who is very dear to us, may have her cancer battle back. We are waiting 'word' from biopsy yesterday. She's a triple negative breast cancer survivor , the  Answers in 3-5days. Triple negative by the way, in regards to breast cancer , is ultimate worst.

 

Our cousin died a day ago. Her hubby and mine are partners in family business. Only 67. heart. Never smoked. very sudden. Next week calling hours' funeral on Thursday. We are all yet in shock. EXTREME shock

 

Mother in-law , 94 in/out hospital with congestive heart failure.

My Mom, 90, well lets just say....things now going south with her.... In more ways than you can even imagine.

 

Me....I am well, well sorta. Just trying to support everyone else. Watching grandkids, hosting family. Decided I needed tor reach out for some help. So starting some therapy October 8th....Christian based , Long overdue for issues I have 'stuffed' for years. Better late than never eh? Me hearts been hurting more than ever from past incidents and its time to address it. I only mention it because, we can all gain from admitting weakness and getting help. No matter who we are, where we have been...yadda yadda yadda.

 

Not gonna smoke over it though. No way. I would have thought about 5 years ago, Would have been an excuse to smoke, yes? I always had an excuse to smoke back then. Always. Best now to look at what the excuse would be ahead of time and deal with it, yes? Me thinks so.

 

So anyway, more family arrived this evening. I am going to bed. Just had the twins here for past 2 days and I am exhausted. Workout? Whats that? I will leet you borrow the twins for 2 days and believe me,,,,,it's a hell of a workout....Enjoyable one though  I love them so much !

Double header baseball game to enjoy in morning for grandson. Can't wait. He had a grand slam last week and he only almost 10.  Company here now till a week from today. Crazy week ahead with familes kids stay here that I will watch night of calling hours and funeral. So I will not be online much my friends, or painting, or doing much else.

 

Time will pass and I will be back to be part of this amazing family. For you who are new, welcome. Stay near this site, as the support is like non other than you can ever hope for. I am sorry to be absent now, but can't be helped. I miss you all and I will be back as soon as I can. My sincere apologies for not being supportive and active recently. I lift all of you up everynght in my prayers, even the newbies, who I have not yet met,...Yur all near my heart, always.

 

Love Missy

So I have just returned from walk in clinic and have upper respiratory infection and was given ZPAC and Zofran for nausea. Im just worn out.

I had to laugh when I saw all the moderation going on, on the site and thought of this title.  Really not much to say. Im just whipped.  Snuggled with my Dobie boy on sofa and 'zzzzzzzzzz'.

 

Behave, Be patient.....

Don't smoke-vape-chew.  Everything in moderation except those things. 

 

Me eyes even hurt. N.O.P.E.

Unless you have decided your not worth it...or your family members are not worth it...or your pets are not worth it...or your friends are not worth it....

 

See , even if you do not realize it, YOUR habit is indirectly hurting them too.

STOP IT

Are you worth it or are they? If so quit making excuses and get busy learning what to do and do it.

 

 

So MIL , it has been decided, will stay at the care facility she is in and we have got her now on the maximum level of care. I was all set to bring her here and then decided, no....I am taking on way to much and I needed to make sure I take care of myself also. I am learning how to say 'No'. About damn time. I love her dearly and I see her nearly everyday, but if she came here I realized I would have to watch her like a hawk 24/7 and I am not able to do that. I felt plenty of guilt over this decision but we think its best, I do too now that I chewed on this awhile. She's 5 minutes away. 

 

Learning how to make better choices. Learning how to say 'no'. Learning how to set boundaries is an area I will always need to pay attention to. I am no good to anyone else if I am burnt out.

 

I have a crappy cold or allergies now. Family still flying in this coming Saturday. I will be fine. I already feel some relief, compliments of Zyrtec and family support that is.

Life is going to punch you smoking or not....so NEVER make the decision to smoke/Vape or chew because of life happening....unless your wanting it all to end.

 

Now isn't this a peachy post  N.O.P.E.

My Mother in Law has CHF , long story short...she's going to be moving in with us next week. She is like a mother to me. She is 94.

Spent most of yesterday n ER with her and she's declining rapidly.

 

 FYI....I will be away from site till we get her moved in late next week.

 

Prayers appreciated, stressful time but we know and feel, it's the right thing to do. Since I am college grad surgical asst, ( retired) , I know what to do to help her and she won't be alone.

 

I will paint as I keep her company and we will enjoy listening to Vivaldi together and some other 'greats'. Its a time i cannot get back so I need to do this. Meanwhile I will share some paintings as this is ongoing but probably not much activity on site otherwise. Love to all . I WILL get back once we are settled.

xoxoMissy

 

 

Wanted to add: When life gets complicated , I think of these songs by Jason Mraz....they ALWAYS lift me up and I come full circle on why I do what I do and why I am who I am. It matters, YOU matter ....WE ALL MATTER.

 

Songs :

1. 93 million miles

2. I won't give up

3. Love is still the answer

 

I'd post the videos but don't know how. Look them up on YOUTUBE., I promise the videos will melt your heart, make you smile and you will understand...you matter

Mandolinrain

5

Posted by Mandolinrain Sep 2, 2019

'Get busy living or get busy dying'.... ( a quote from the movie 'Shawshank Redemption' )....pretty much sums up WHY I quit smoking. If you would have told me 5 years ago  I would make it to a 5 years in my quit, I would not have believed you. I had, had more failed attempts than i have fingers and toes.

 

 

I knew friends who quit and managed but I just had a terrible time. It was the one thing I wanted more than anything yet it felt so unobtainable, at least thats what I told myself…as as we all know…IF you feed yourself nothing but the negative you soon will believe it to be true. Until for me........

I read Carrs book and hooked up here on this site.

 I was a stubborn student. I needed to do everything you all suggested MY WAY first . Rather painful way to go about quitting and I don’t recommend it.

 

I  remember watching former smokers I knew personally, enjoy a nice dinner at a gathering and never needing to excuse themselves, as I still had to because I also had to feed my addiction to Nicotine.. I was envious. I really wanted what they had. I just didnt understand the connection about how our brains receptors wake up each time we inhaled and it was setting me up, unknowingly for the next smoke. When I understood the concept it was a game changer for me.

I finally grasped it, with this site and Carrs book. It took a couple times, but that book did stir me into the right direction, so for me, it helped.

 

Honestly , for my successful quit, God gets the credit.  I know after many prayers and tears, He is the one responsible for putting all of you into my life ….a lamp /light to my path leading me all the time. It was not until I totally gave Hm my situation and realize I could not do this without Him nor did I want to.  I needed Him to do for me what I could not do for myself, so I surrendered. This site was where HE planted me and like any new plant…I grew.  Over time, my roots developed here. My Elders watered me and they pruned me when my stubbornness  showed up, they were patient, yet firm and always thoughtful.So yes, I give all the credit to God first then all my Elders here and even the Newbies have played a role in my continued growth and quit and for all of you, I ever so grateful.

 

I understand now WHY theres so many different ways to quit that work.  We all have a story to share and although mine may not match yours, it will eventually catch the attention of someone else who relates to me. So THAT, to me, is why it was never My timing , but His.

 

Anyway, I am here to stay to share my journey with whomever wants to listen. If I help one person, so be it. Every person who comes to EX is worth while saving from this horrid addiction. 

Being active on this site is my BOOSTER SHOT and helps me remain accountable and allows me to reach out and help others as I have been helped.

 

 

BOTTOM LINE FOR ME:

This site with all of your support~The book by Alan Carr -Vicks Vapor Rub and above all , my continued relationship with God….is what I credit the success with MY quit.

 

THIS is what worked for me. Don't assume MY PLAN will be your success. There are many many good plans on this site by fellow Exers who have beautiful quits as a result of THEIR PLAN. EXPLORE THEM ALL. You will find one that works for you. I can only share what worked for me. Maybe a 'little bit of this or a little bit of that' but you WILL find the answers if you are dedicated enough to take what you need and leave the rest. ACCEPT that we all have the same goal with perhaps different avenues to arrive at being nicotine free. We are all just sharing our journeys and are only suggesting what MAY help you makes your's easier.

AND FOR ME....thats is whats behind the words "Take what you need and leave the rest"

 

God Bless~ Thanks for being an important part of my journey, my life and my heart.

Missy~ 5 years Nicotine free today 9-2-14

 

 

PS: Grandkids and Hubby are all asleep, I am headed to bed now as well. Knew I would not have time till much later to get on the site if at all. Happy Monday and Labour Day

Mandolinrain

This and That

Posted by Mandolinrain Aug 31, 2019

Do you have it all? All the answers ~I don't.

 

It takes a little bit of this....and a little bit of that...and THAT

can be a different animal depending on who you are talking to on this site.

 

AND THATS okay. I don't want to be Like you or expect you to be like me. I just wanna be me and daily I am a working on becoming a better version of 'ME'.

 

I love the diversity of this site. We have all got something to give and take away to help us grow in our journey to stay and or be Nicotine free. 

 

What we do not need is folks coming on here giving us 'labels'.This is MY OPINION. You can agree to disagree if ya want.,...thats cool with me, but be kind.

 

This has been on me mind tonight and so I felt to share. I come here to tell folks that quitting smoking is HARD, yes, but I share how I did it. What worked and what did not for me. Others have a totally different way that worked or did not for them. Thats whats so cool. So many ways to work through it. Not one way is right or wrong.

I don't come here often because I need to...I come because I want to. I want to help someone like those before me came to be here  ( and most are still here) to help me. Period.

As always...Take what you need and leave the rest : someone will always take the leftovers....I did, and then some.

Have a great weekend. ~Missy

Sending out prayers of safety for anyone in Florida awaiting DORIAN.

 

sweetplt is down there right now. Ralph1955 and   vanlil who live there.

 

 

Be safe and keep us all updated!

Mandolinrain

Love is all that matters

Posted by Mandolinrain Aug 25, 2019

I am listening to this as I am doing some indoor chores. Love this song very very much. Wish I knew how to post the video for you, but Tec gal I am not.

 

"Love Is Still The Answer" lyrics

Jason Mraz Lyrics

Play "Love Is Still The A…"
on Amazon Music

"Love Is Still The Answer"

 

 

The question is why, why are we here?
To say our hello's and goodbye's and then disappear
This beautiful life, what is it for?
To learn how to master peace or master war

 

There's only one answer that matters
Even if your heart has been shattered
Whatever you want, whatever you are after
Love is still the answer
Love is still the answer

 

We all make mistakes, no, we're not perfect yet
Maybe God made us all from an accident
The question that sits on everyone's lips
Is why should we pick ourselves up and start over again

 

Well, there's only one answer that matters
Even if your heart and your dreams have been shattered
Whatever you want, whatever you are after
Love is still the answer

 

Love, love, love, love
Love, love, love
Love, love, love, love
Love, love, love, love

 

The question I'll ask at the end of my days
Is what did I give and what will I take

 

Well, there's only one answer that matters
Even if your heart and your dreams have been shattered
Whatever you want, whatever you are after
Love is still the answer
Love is still the answer

 

Love, love, love, love
Love, love, love
Love, love, love, love
Love, love, love, love
Love, love, love, love
Love, love, love, love

 

'Cause what the world needs now is love
And all you need is love
Love, love, love, love
Love, love, love, love