Developing new coping mechanisms for triggers requires conscious focus when trying to replace the bad habit with a good one.
Yesterday my emotions made me feel like a runaway car with no brakes. I acutally experienced brake failure when stopped at a red light on a very steep hill in rush hour traffic in a borrowed car during my first year driving (age 16). I initially panicked as the car began to drift backward toward the vehicle behind me. I gave the car just enough gas to keep me from rolling backward and not to hit th stopped car in front of me too. A delicate working of the gas pedal until the light turned green. Eventually, I headed up a graded side road very, very slowly then threw the car into park. Not a great thing to do for the engine but I did get stopped without hitting anyone. Never once did it cross my mind to use the EMERGENCY BRAKE. I made a strong mental note not to forget that in case a similar situation arose in the future.
Yesterday, I forgot to put on my stress emergency brake -- doing my deep breathing -- when I was in runaway mode. I will make a more conscious effort to practice this when the next situation arises. Smoking really isn't a stress management tool. I need to reread this article when needed.
Oprah.com | January 01, 2006
"I need cigarettes because I am stressed. I need this to cope with stress."
Many smokers share this common belief. You may really believe this and, like so many smokers, this is how you explain your smoking behavior to yourself. But what if it's just a belief, not a fact?
What if smoking is just an overrated activity...a bad habit...rote, negative behavior having nothing to do with stress management? Perhaps it distracts you when you're upset. But can smoking solve real-life problems? No, it is a real-life problem itself. This is the classic false belief of addicted smokers, and it must be challenged and debunked to learn to live smoke-free.
When did smoking a cigarette ever solve a real-life problem?
Smoking because of stress is what is called a rationalization. This is something you tell yourself to try to make yourself feel good about something you really feel bad about. We all do it, but smokers are especially prone to rationalize about stress and smoking.
The truth is that an addicted smoker doesn't need a reason to smoke. The momentum of smoking, its automatic quality, is a three-headed monster. It comes from:
- the effect that smoking cigarettes has on your brain and body
- the repetitive, habitual nature of smoking
- the role of the smoker's social environment—primarily exposure to other smokers and smoke, which are contagious
Smoking is an uncreative and repetitive response to life stress. It actually weakens the opportunity to develop healthy and flexible coping responses by relying on a fixed and rote way of responding to living.
Talk about living inside a box...only this one is a cigarette box!
