This morning I was dangerously close to giving up my quit. I just wanted to smoke and I found I didn't really care if I blew it or not. First blog I read was by chuck-2-20-2011 all about addiction, nothing I hadn't learned. But it still had more of a strong hold on me than I cared to admit. I was feeling a loss as I sat with my coffee and tears came to my eyes for missing the association with a smoke. Change has never come easy for me and quitting smoking has been one of the most difficult changes I have made. Chuck wrote in his blog entitled "CHANGES"
"The reality that’s so hard to see at first is that we’re not losing a thing, but we’re gaining everything! Never believe that change isn’t worth it! Never think that change is impossible because then you become a barrier to yourself!"
And a barrier to myself is where I found myself this morning. I'm not losing a thing and I can accept that. I guess to sum it up, old nicodemon popped up out of the blue and smacked me a good one upside the head.
I'm ok now. I'm not smoking, thanks chuck-2-20-2011. Today is day 30.
