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2015
JACKIE1-25-15

Merry Christmas

Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Dec 25, 2015

.My wish for all.  Great to be smokefree Christmas 2015.  Awesome

Good morning all.  It has been a while since my last blog. Going to make this as quick as possible.   I have been busy the last few days. I see there are a lot of post from my friends and newbies.  Got to catch up if I can.   I just want to say how thankful I am that I don't smoke anymore.  It is almost a year since I quit.  My birhtday present to myself.

This morning while drinking coffee on the patio, I remembered, but "I don't do that anymore'".  That was a very comforting moment, very hard to put into words. Then I thought how thankful I am not to have to smoke after a meal.  I no longer have to rush to get that nicotine fix.  I no longer have to stop while traveling to get that smoke. No longer have to spray to rid the odor.  I no longer have to find a place to smoke. Yeah!!!!.  I no longer (my son old me this one) cough everytime I laugh.  Hallelujah! The highest Praise!   My sinuses have greatly improved beyond measure.   I am jumping up and down right now.  I can walk a brisk 2- 3 miles and not get out of breathe.  I enjoy singing in the choir, I must say my voice is much better.  I can sing a joyful noise to the Lord and not be guilt ridden.

I want to tell anyone who is thinking about quitting this is "DOABLE" So DO IT!!!!!!!.  It does take work but it is worth it.  Sometimes the journey is not easy but Don't give up don't give in. NO MATTER WHAT  Smoking is not an option. SINAO  Not one puff ever NOPE.  With Ex support you can get through it.  Love yourself and get started on your forever quit journey NOW.   It would be a wonderful Christmas present that keeps on giving. 

 Merry Christmas to all. Not Only be Blessed But Be A Blessing.  

Thanks to all for your support. 

JACKIE1-25-15

Get this

Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Dec 16, 2015

Well another blow out.  To make a very long story short, Saturday I spent the afternoon searching for some new shoes for my dad.  I returned and was given a snide remark because I did not come back with shoes.  I asked my Dad if he wanted me to continue to look for them or did he want his money back. Of course, he wanted his money back.  I gave him the money back and asked him to please remember that I gave it back to him.  He replied I remembered I gave it to you didn't I.   So I gave him his money back. This morning he mentioned getting shoes again.  I suggested that we look on line to look for some shoes before I go out again.  He did not quite get it but he wants me to give him his money back.  Ughhh! Guess what?  I flipped, got upset after he made more snide remarks but I am at the point that I am over it and he is not a reason to smoke.   I never thought the day would come that I would be TOO mad to smoke. I guess I have had enough test with him.  If I could just not let him upset me so I would be very happy.  The duct tape worked for a few days.  I have to find something new. Only smoking out of the ears. lmho Merry Christmas Happy Holidays

JACKIE1-25-15

My Avatar

Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Dec 16, 2015

I call her my Angel.  I found her on a trash pile several years ago and painstakingly restored her.  She has over 400 lights and has been renewed to her original beauty.  Like Angel we can be renewed by letting go of excuses and make a commitment that NO MATTER WHAT not to smoke. .Success can be achieved  by doing the work, believing in yourself, with support, giving support, offering encouragement and love for our fellowmen and women.  Qutting is a two way street, blog, comment, message, and enjoy the journey.  You may be helping someone else with a few words of encouragement.   If we do the work we can have success to quit smoking and be restored to be a light for others. Thank God for the site. Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, God Bless. 

JACKIE1-25-15

323 and Thank you.

Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Dec 14, 2015

There is no better feeling than knowing that no matter what I will not smoke.  It is also great to be 323 days smoke free and don’t have to smoke, the choice is mine.  I am so thankful that I have arrived at this point of my nonsmoking journey.  I feel so free from the grips of nicotine.    My mind is at peace.  A load has been lifted.  Thank God I can celebrate this Christmas smoke free.   Even if I may occasionally think about it; as someone said.  “I would rather think about it than to act upon it”.  From this moment I am going to use those thoughts just as a reminder to be on guard to protect my quit. 

To those who are just starting this journey, there are some great people here to help.   The elders, just to name a few.  Nancy and Marilyn would always tell me that quitting is “doable” and it is.  Guilia taught me to meet the challenge head on.  That I was stronger than any nicotine addiction.  No bars holding for every trial I would get stronger if I did not smoke and I did. Dale's I don't do that anymore got me through.   Sky Girl, Sheri @dancingthrulife, Sharon (Smorgy)their advice is top notch.  Wow look at that!   From now on I am going to call them the 3 S’s.    My dear Thomas taught me to be patient with my quit, not to fight it but ride the withdrawal like riding on a wave.  It was an enjoyable ride. Without him I would not have made it. Storm I miss you.  I could on and on and on. I would advise you to take the time to read some of their blogs.  It helped me stay smoke free.  Listen to their advice.  Don’t try to do this on your own.  This blog is getting longer than I anticipated (Donna) lol  

I have so many others friends, quit buddies (The Great Eight), motivators, encouragers that relayed things about themselves that helped me improve also.  Jimmie thanks for always having my back.   Eric 1 you are amazing.  You have helped me in areas of my life that I never touched.  Thank you for your openness in sharing.  I have learned so much from you.  Puff, thanks for keeping me smiling and smh.  Terrie my Sunshine I look forward to seeing you every day.  Mike a cheerful good morning EVERYDAY with my coffee.  Barbara thanks for your inspiration.   Candy girl, continue to "rock" your quit.  Donna, Ellen, Deb, your lives are a testimony to those who want to throw in the towel.  Newbies read there blogs @ DJ Murray, Elvan, Hamptons and understand what they have been through and still not one puff.  If they can anyone can.

Gee I sound like I am giving a speech.  I may not have directly mentioned your name but thank you all. To my friends whose paths I have crossed and you are in limbo. NEVER GIVE UP!   Keep trying no matter how many times it takes until it sticks like spaghetti.   The main thing is to make up in your mind that you are going to learn from your mistakes of relapse and never to return again.  NO MATTER WHAT!  It is not always easy but “doable”.   Get back on track.   If you can do 24hrs you can do 48 and then 72 then 3 weeks then one month, 60 days. 90 days, 6 months, 10 months, 1 yr.  a lifetime.  Let’s get started.  Say Yes!  NO MATTER WHAT NOPE.  Start today.  we are here for you.

I don’t have to smoke, the choice is mine.  

Merry Christmas Happy Holidays God Bless.

When you have a problem, keep smoking out of the equation, it will not help.

Keep your guard up.  Don’t have too much Jolly and blow your quit.

It feels so good to be free.  Let's stay that way

Rock you’re quit because there is nothing more important than your quit. 

The only thing between success and failure is you.

If you haven't quit, what's holding you back?

Let's get started.  The life you save is your own.   Love yourself enough to quit. 

Don't give up, don't give in.  SINAO   smoking is not an option

NOPE  Just Breathe. Baby Breathe....

I am a non smoker.

Merry Christmas

Happy Holidays

Peace out

Heading for the 6% Club

added Bonnie 12-28-14

Bonnie B

Diane

DJ Murray

Jackie

Jimmie, 

Trudy

WLFSRFAMILY

Summer Rain

JACKIE1-25-15

Head count

Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Dec 6, 2015

Bonnie and I are getting close to 6% and we were trying to remember all who started this journey with us. I could not remember every one.  But for those who are still here could you do a shout out/roll call.  I got DJ, Jimmie, Bonnie, Trudy WLFSRFAMILY. and Diane.  Any others let us know so we can celebrate.  That would be if you quit between "roughly" 12/1/14 and 3/1/2015  give or take a few.  Thanks.  Can't wait to get the results.

This blog is mainly for those who are not actively working their quit but visit or some who may be at the  “just one”  stage and having a tough time getting back on track.  I want to reach out to you and let you know that I haven’t given up on you so don’t give up on yourself.  If you are having a problem let’s talk about it. You may not want to blog but send a personal message to someone if necessary.   We are friends and family here waiting to offer support and encouragement to each other to stay smokefree.

If you have relapsed learn from those mistakes don’t give up don’t give in try again.  Don’t give in to the negative thoughts and EXCUSES.  Yes, you will have withdrawals, urges and craving.  Yes, you will have emotional changes.  Yeah, you may have to deal with insomnia.  Yes, your partner my still smoke.   Okay, so you may gain a little weight.  Isn’t it worth all that not ever taking another puff and not be chained to  nicotine?  

You can do this.  Yes, it sounds easier than what it is.  However, it is not as hard as you THINK,    Your life will change for the better, if you just take the first step.  1) Get a PLAN and WORK it.    Don’t give up do not give in.   I remember one of the elders saying there is a time in our lives that we just have to “grow up” and stop depending on a drug o take us through.   Yes I said it DRUG.  Just like the others just cheaper.   Get mad and throw all the lighters, ashtrays, butts, cigarettes away.  Whatever is in sight that reminds you of smoking get rid of it.  Stop holding on.  If you hold on you should question your quit.    Say no more!  Do whatever is necessary to get started and then take it from there one day at a time.  We are here for you.   I am pleading for you to get back on track and save your life one breath at a time.  Stop the suicide.  Give yourself the gift of life for Christmas.    You know me, NOPE and SINAO smoking is not an option.  315DOF 

JACKIE1-25-15

Thought4today

Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Dec 4, 2015

Growth - When I am in control of my thoughts, urges, cravings, etc. about smoking and they no longer control me ;;;;no matter what!.   I believe every day we learn something new or see a situation in a different light.  Just think about it.  Consider ALL we have been going through and we still chose not to take not one puff ever.  I think we should all stand up and take a bow.  Ellen Donna Terrie Summer Candy Bonnie Thomas you all go first.  I applaud you all even if I did not call your name forgive me if I did not please add that name for me.

Those of  you have who started and have taken a back seat it is time to step up.  Those of you who have not started a plan time is running out.  Be afraid of death.  Know that you can do this also.  We keep saying it NOPE. Stop making excuses to continue smoking.  You say you want to quit.  Do you really?b Or do you prefer to keep talking about why you can.t.   No it is not easy but oh so "doable".  Hell.  life in itself is not easy.  Take a deep breathe give yourself the best gift you can give for the Christmas holiday," the breathe of life". Have a good night.  May God's peace, love and healing power be with all the sick. NOBBABB "not only be blessed but be a blessing". 

JACKIE1-25-15

Today is a new day

Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Dec 3, 2015

 Still smoke free and I am thankful for that.  Breathing deep and hoping for a good day which has started out okay.   I have already served breakfast and for the most part he and I are moving forward.   I understand that my 93.11 years old dad is not going to change.   Me remembering that is the problem. I had menioned before that on one occassion  I allowed my father to be the trigger of a relapse.  I refuse to ever take another puff.  Just one puff could destroy my quit.  It can be as simple as that. One Puff. Not one cigarette or pack but ONE PUFF!

Each time I am challenged I get stronger.  Today I am feeling stronger.  My goal is to learn how to control these emotions and be slow to anger.  (Pray)  I have to get a mantra for that.  Hopefully, I will not allow him to cause me to flip and become that ugly female that I despise. However, I am my father’s child and the fruit does not fall from the tree.  God forgive me for all my transgressions.

So here goes.  My brother is coming to assist me to move his bed to my house since mine is too “soft”.   He wants to come along to look for some things and go to the pharmacy.   I am just going to keep my mouth closed (duct tape?) and stay focused on the goals.  NOPE not one puff ever.  Ouch!  Duct tape will hurt coming off.  Have a great smoke free day.  I am a nonsmoker.   Blogging has helped to get me this far. 312 days of freedom.  Don’t keep lurking say something.  It helps. For Real. Thanks for all of your encouragement.  Let's have another cup of coffee. 

JACKIE1-25-15

I could have

Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Dec 2, 2015

I recognized that whenever I got angry. I use to smoke.  Today I got so angry that I was almost in tears and could have smoked.  I haven't cried in a long time my feelings were so hurt. I was almost in tears.  Call me the drama queen if you want to.   Working hard to make better accommodations for my dad. Oh, I can't call him dad anymore says it makes him feel uncomfortable.  Anyway I told him I would call him by his last name.  

No matter what you do something is going to be wrong. I guess I was waiting for it and I lashed out.  I think it has always been this way and I told him so.  It seems to really be more because we are in the same house.   What did I do?  I moved some of his papers. Lo and behold the world is going to end. They were all over the floor and I had to vacumn.  Now he has to get them all organized again.   We got into it.  Says he has to get out of here.  I told him fine.   Anyway I didn't smoke but I could have.  I am sure I would have regrets if I did. I am glad that I didn't.  I could have used it for an excuse.

 Now it is from tears to laughter.  Oh well I must be going crazy.   I am leaving and I may not come back.  I am turning out all the lights.  I am locking him up and throwing away the key.  Help. I didnt smoke.  I could have but I didn't.  I will be glad when I learn how to handle my emotions.  Yuck this sucks.

JACKIE1-25-15

Why?

Posted by JACKIE1-25-15 Dec 1, 2015

Why couldn’t I stop myself?

Why I am I getting in my car and driving to the store?

Sitting outside the store wondering why I couldn't stop from going inside. 

Anxious

Maybe,  I wasn’t trying hard enough.

What was propelling me so on auto pilot? I couldn't tell myself no.

 Before I ask for my brand  I scan the store to see if I know anyone.

The shame

There is a sigh of relief

Somebody else is buying some too.

But still the agony

Why did I quickly hide them as I walked out of the store?

Why did I just had to have them?

I thought to myself how did I get here?

When did this all start?

Why can’t I let this go?

The escape

I continue to ask myself why even while lighting up.

Why did I have to wait until I was out of sight before taking that first drag?

The shame

Hiding but feeling a certain relief of the crave/craze.... as I had my fix. 

Had to have it,  but why?  

The agony

Who does this anymore?

It just doesn’t make a lot of sense.  Inhaling smoke and blowing it out.

The stench of it all made me sick. Always fanning it away, blowing it in another direction not to be close to the smoke.

I can’t stand it. 

Cover up. 

Let’s spray.

Hidden in a closet along with my feelings and emotions.

Most of my friends didn’t know that I smoked.

When will I let it go and no longer have to hide?

I have the answer now. NICOTINE ADDICTION

Until I educated myself I was stuck.

Now I am free!

310 days of it.

NEF Never ever forget or you will be back in this trap. Get it?