~~Learning to believe in yourself won't always be easy. There's no simple cure to self-doubt--that voice inside you that says "I will never be good enough." That is why you should take care of your doubt--hold its hand in the rain and remind it that you are a human being and it's okay for you not to be perfect. It's okay for you to take longer than others. It's okay for you to fail, it's okay for you to learn and it's okay for you to try again.~~ Juansen Dizon, Be Your Own Kind of Magic
Addiction is sneaky, people. It lies and it preys on your weaknesses. It knows your secret fears...your unspoken doubts....your overwhelming worries. Because all these things go around and around in your head as you try to shield yourself from a world that can be challenging by smoking.
So if you are doubting you can quit, don't. If you are doubting your strength to quit, don't. If you are doubting your ability to live smoke free, don't. Don't believe those nagging little whispers that 'you can't', 'you can't', 'you can't'.
Battling your own mind, however, can be exhausting...and futile. How about trying to make friends with your doubts instead? How about taking care of them? How about making peace with those sides of you that are less than perfect?
While your addictive brain exploits your doubts, you yourself can accept them. So you are afraid of change? That's ok. It's not anything to be ashamed of, right? So you have some secret shame that stops you from really living? Nurture that part of you....take good care of it...so the broken parts can heal, even if they heal crookedly. Scars are proof that you are stronger than your open wounds. Allow them to close by simply loving them. You failed at quitting before? That's ok. You learned...you tried...you haven't lost, only regrouped. You aren't supposed to be perfect...just human. And as humans, we have flaws as well as skills, faults as well as virtues. But that doesn't make us 'bad' or 'unworthy'. It makes us....us.
Yet, addiction will tell you that you aren't good enough to quit. Addiction will slyly bring all your doubts to the surface until you run back and hide behind that cloud of smoke you've called safety for so long. Addiction lies. Addiction exploits. Addiction finds excuses.
If you make friends with your doubts....if you love your wounds....if you are okay with those flaws and faults...addiction will lose. It won't have anything to use against you. It loses its power.
And you gain life. You gain your place in this world. You learn that you've always been okay...you just needed to remember that.