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Lose Yourself

Posted by Dancingthrulife_6.4.13 Oct 27, 2018

~~Lose yourself.  In laughter and nature and lovely moments, kisses and cuddles.  In a much needed conversation with someone you love or and adventure, or your favorite book or movie, some good food and precious company,  Lose yourself in the tender breeze of the wind, the song of birds around you, the strokes of sunshine on your brow, the glitter of stars winking.  Because you will surely find yourself, my dear.  And you'll realize all is well.~~  SC Lourie


Just lose yourself in everything you love and you'll lose that desire to hold on to the thought that you need to smoke.  Lose yourself in fun and in healthy living and in joy.  Lose yourself in new experiences and sweet memories and good times. 

The more you embrace life, my friends, the less you'll hold on to the idea you 'need' a cigarette. You'll let go of your fear of failing, your fear that you "can't".  Fill your time with laughter and lovely moments.  Fill your days with friends and fresh air.  Fill your heart with love and happy and contentment. 

Turn towards those strokes of sunshine on your brow and allow the shadows of addiction to fall behind you.  Let it be something you used to do but no longer need to continue.  Let it go with grace and peace, allowing regret and shame dissolve into acceptance and healing. 

There is no need to tie yourself to smoking any longer.  All the good you deserve in life is just on the other side of addiction, waiting patiently as you let go of the lies addiction has told you.  Lose yourself in all the world has to offer, all you have always wondered about, and all you want to do.  You can, you know.  The world is yours and it is waiting.


May you have a day filled with lovely moments,




Posted by Dancingthrulife_6.4.13 Oct 19, 2018

~~We can either watch life from the sidelines, or actively participate....Either we let self-doubt and feelings of inadequacy prevent us from realizing our potential, or embrace the fact that when we turn our attention away from ourselves, our potential is limitless.~~  Christopher Reeve


I find that actively participating in life is much more satisfying than watching life from the sidelines.  Sure, I make mistakes but even then I get the opportunity to apologize or fix  them or otherwise learn from those mistakes.  I also get the joy of helping others, the excitement of new adventures, and the peace that comes from living each day my way.  


Smoking limits us, you know.  It limits our activities, it limits our time, and it limits our lives.  Still, with knowing all that, the fear of living without cigarettes can be so paralyzing that we simply pass on actively participating in our quits.  We may 'try' of course.  We may hold on for a few agonizing days.  But we can't picture ourselves ever living life without a pack nearby.


It was only when I decided to quit despite my fears....despite a reluctance to leave my comfort zone...despite my longing to have both a smoke free life and yet the ease of my routine....that I began to understand just how much I had been sitting on the sidelines.  The more active I became in my life the less I thought about what I was 'giving up'.  Because the truth was that I wasn't giving up anything worth holding on to.  I was gaining everything instead.


Maybe you don't want adventure.  Maybe you don't want to help others.  Maybe you don't even want to 'actively participate' in life.  It's your choice, of course.  But I can say from experience that if you get that "it's terminal" diagnosis....or if you get that eye opening heart attack....or if you are touched by the suicide of a loved suddenly takes on a sweeter note.  Don't wait for that brush with death before you decide you want to live.  Live now.  Get up and get out and grab life by the hand!!  Your potential is limitless.


Discipline Is

Posted by Dancingthrulife_6.4.13 Oct 16, 2018

~~Discipline is just choosing between what you want now and what you want most.~~


I want to apologize for not checking in lately.  There are so many people here I am in awe of and I love checking on their progress as they move forward in their quits.  Quite an amazing group of quitters!!  Stan, Ralph, Ann, Christine...the list goes on and on.


After Hurricane Michael hit, I just wanted my family safe.  And, thank God, they are.  But my son and his family can't go home, although they've travelled back to meet with insurance adjusters, contractors, etc....They've been staying with me, of course, but even that may end as my son's boss wants him to return to work.  Without power, without a working cell phone (Verizon's towers still don't work) and without gas to get around.  They would need to find a hotel as's just a bit of a mess yet as to what they can and will be able to do.


Here in DeFuniak Springs, things have also changed as this is a stopping off point for first responders, contractors, and others who need to get to the affected areas.  We have long gas lines when we have gas, we have no food in our stores, and the laundry mats stay busy.  Traffic is sometimes a nightmare and families who come here no longer have homes to go back to.  


So my time and attention are on those people right now. I can't help but I can listen, I can refer, and I can support.  I still have my two jobs as well and religious education to teach now two days a week (first communion classes are starting!).  But please, please know that each quitter is in my heart and in my prayers!!  I know you have it in you to quit and I know the courage you never dreamed you had is waiting for permission to come forth.  


I don't know how long it will take for things to get back to 'normal'.  And I'm ok with the abnormal because my family is safe.  Know that I believe in you and I will be checking in so if you need me, just shoot me a message and I will respond.  Promise  


Use the elders here as well!!  They WANT you to succeed, they know all the ins and outs of quits, and they can provide remarkable support and wisdom  


Much, much love to all,



~~The heart of human excellence often begins to beat when you discover a pursuit that absorbs you, frees you, challenges you, or gives you a sense of meaning, joy, or passion.~~  Terry Orlick


There is absolutely nothing like the feeling you get when doing something you love!  Whether it be teaching GED classes to inmates, offering comfort to someone during a difficult time, or picking up a paintbrush for the first time only to discover you love to create art  


Sometimes it's a simple matter of reading a good book on a rainy day or gardening under a gentle morning sun.  Holding a baby or learning to play piano or taking a pottery class.


I've often said here on ex that you need to quit your way.  You are uniquely you so following someone else's quit journey is not going to be the best fit for you even if it works for a time.  Taking that thought even further, how about if your heart of excellence starts to beat as you discover that pursuit that gives you a sense of meaning?  Of joy?  Of passion?

What is it that sparks a light in you?  What is it that brings you a sense of meaning?  


Find these things if you don't already have them!  Take your focus away from how 'hard' this quit is to how much you can learn about yourself.  You know, all the things that make you smile.  All those things that bring you joy.  All those moments that bring purpose to your life.


I can tell you that it's in you.  All those wonderful, freeing, absorbing pursuits that you were put here to do, to feel, to love.  And the more you turn from those unhealthy, negative habits that suck the joy right out of you, the more the true you will start to glimmer...and then shine.  You have that heart of human excellence that is just longing to beat....bring it to life   The world is waiting.




~~When you have something good....when you have something good, you don't play with it!  You don't take chances with it!  You don't take risks with it!  When you got something good, you get every single thing you can get out of it!  Because guess what?  When you take care of something good, that something good takes care of you.~~  Eric Thomas


That something good I'm talking about is you.  Yes, you!!  I don't want you taking risks with you anymore.  I don't want you taking chances.  And when you smoke, that's exactly what you're doing.  You are risking your health.  You are risking your life.  And yet, even with the warning signs...shortness of breath, gum disease, heart problems, smoke.  And in your addiction, you don't think about the negatives.  That would put a damper on 'enjoying' the smoke.  Instead, you shut off your mind while that nicotine soothes the craving you had.  Smoking is giving you your 'fix'.


But when you have something good, you are supposed to get every single thing you can out of it!!  You are full of creative energies left untapped.  You are full of laughter, fun, and warmth all stuffed under the need for nicotine.  You are so much more than you can ever realize as you smoke!  Because you are buried underneath the addiction.  Quitting brings out the very best you are....the sweetness, the wonder, the magic of you!  


And you know what?  When you take good care of you, your body, in turn...and your mind, and your spirit and your soul...all will take good care of you.  You will find hidden treasures within yourself and those hidden treasures will bring light to your day and joy to your world.  You will sing more, stress less.  You will feel more generous, less isolated.  You will hope more, hide less.  


When you have something good, recognize it for what it is.  YOU, my friend, are that good!!  Don't risk yourself any longer.  Don't take chances with your health.  Don't risk death, disease, cancer because you don't want to let go of that addiction.  Life is waiting for you because it recognizes the good you are.  You are needed here.  You have a purpose.  And the world is better off because you are in it.  So please don't risk all that you are for an addiction that takes so much away from you.


It's time to quit.  And it's time to get every single thing you can out of you  

~~I used to sit on the banks with a raft and watch the water roll lazily by.  One day I pushed my raft into the shallows of the water and found the water moved swifter than I thought.  My raft was actually a boat.  Then, after some time, I rowed by little boat into deeper water.  There were great storms, mighty winds, tremendous waves, and sometimes I felt so alone.  But I have noticed my little rowboat is now a mighty ship manned by my friends and loved ones; and beautiful calm seas, warm sunny days, and nights filled with comfortable dreams always double after a storm.  Now I could never go back and sit on the bank.  In fact, I search for deeper water.  Such is life when lived.~~  B. D. Gulledge


I know not everyone is at a place in their life where they can say they love life.  I know not everyone can see through their storm.  And I know not everyone has a clear vision of what their life is supposed to be like rather than the chaos they think it is.


But I can tell you that on the other side of that storm CAN be a breathtaking rainbow.  And I can tell you that when your vision clears, you CAN see a joyous life ahead.  And that after the chaos has calmed, life CAN be sheer tranquility.  


And I know because I've been on both sides.  I've lived through some storms.  I've been shortsighted.  I've struggled through chaos and turmoil.  Most of it has been of my own making, of course.  Because often it's our own thought process that determines our reality.  Sometimes outside forces change our worlds as well, but even then it's how WE think about things that get us through to the other side.


Quitting smoking is our chance to bring positive energy and strength to our worlds.  "Change your thoughts and you change your world", right?!!  


I can't begin to tell you how much I love my life.  It's not all sunshine and unicorns.  I have two jobs, two teens at home, financial constraints and obligations that are not quite under control, a mother who doesn't understand me, yaddah, yaddah, yaddah…….


But you know what else I have?  I have pride in my students when they pull their TABE scores up.  I have pride in my visiting parents when they gain unsupervised visitation with their children because they overcame addiction or other personal issues.  I have joy in nature regardless of it raining or blooming roses.  I am grateful for the moments.  Loving new adventures.  I'm sad when I'm sad but then I move on.  No longer stuck in the negative emotions, I know that they are part of life but not ALL of life.  I've changed and in doing so, my world is good.


I guess what I'm telling you is that it's your decision to make.  Smoke or don't smoke.  Struggle or accept.  Cry or smile.  Hold on or give up.  It's all on you to decide how your life is going to be and that in itself should make you smile.  It's all on you....not what's going on with you, not what's happening around you, not what's up a head.  It's simply on you.


Life is just life.  We can watch it go by while sitting on the bank or we can get in the water and find out that our raft is in actuality a ship that can navigate through any storm.  


And if you disagree with my take on life, I applaud you.  You are thinking for yourself, making your own determinations, and I think that is wonderful, too   It's your world, your life.  Make it what you will.

~~If I could, I would send you a box of happiness wrapped in a bow that you could take into your heart so you could breathe easier right how.  I would sweep out the cobwebs of fear and regret so that you no longer have to stumble upon them in the dark.

I would make sure you walk through this world knowing that you are celebrated and loved.

Because you are a bright light in this world and you are worthy of this and so much more.

So today I send you the blessings of a thousand angels who will help you find your way into heartfelt laughter and a sense of well-being.

Know that you are loved.~~  Laurel Breadon-Maffel


I don't know why but quitting sometimes makes people unhappy.  It brings dark clouds instead of sunshine  and brings out insecurities rather than confidence.

Quitting should be a time of celebration as you turn your focus on what could be rather than what has been.  Picture days of breathing better!!  Picture saving $300-$500 a month!!  Picture smelling so good that your family crowds around you for hugs!!  Picture having more time...more time to spend with those you love, more time to do what you love, more time to enjoy being alive!!

A lifetime of being free from paper, tobacco, chemicals that kill.  A lifetime of never having to run to the store, search for that lighter, find the 'smoking area' sign.  A lifetime of never again burning that hole in your car seat, never freezing as you grab one more outside in 10* weather, never having your family look at you in hurt silence as you excuse yourself after dinner.

Shrouding ourselves in negative emotions, I think, is a side effect of addiction and gives us an out should we decide to relapse.  "I couldn't handle it", "I was going through a horrible time", "When things calm down, I'll quit again".  In actuality, there is nothing bad about quitting.  We don't lose a thing and we gain...well....everything good!!  So by looking forward to everything good, we are encouraged to keep our quit.  By being excited at the thought of another smoke free day, we are supported by positive emotions. 

Sweep out those cobwebs of fear and regret.  Find your way into a sense of well-being and heartfelt laughter.  And know that you deserve to be celebrated and loved!  Each and every day.  You are, after all, a bright light in this world!  And that light is needed and appreciated