~~Cover yourself with love, bathe yourself in forgiveness, honor yourself by pursuing your passions, open yourself to life with purpose, give yourself a chance, surprise yourself with dreams realized.~~ Unknown
For some, quitting smoking is a very pragmatic process. Create your toolbox, chose a quit date, get rid of all smoking items, change routine. Done!
For others, not so logical. Because sometimes smoking masks the pain of living. I understood this clearly when I was talking with someone I was working with. She was a domestic violence survivor, a survivor of sexual abuse as a child, a high school drop out. She was defensive, defiant, angry. She said she was glad I had quit smoking, but that didn't mean she would. Not because she couldn't (so she said), but because it wouldn't change anything for her. No one cared if she lived or died. No one would be proud of her if she quit. And smoking was her comfort. Because she got no comfort from anyone or anything else.
Now most of us don't have pasts like this young woman. Most of us have some sort of support system and most of us have jobs, families to care for, and/or a defined purpose to our lives. Most of us also have a sense of self, a secure feeling about who we are and what we can accomplish.
But some don't. And that breaks my heart. So for those quitters, want to be quitters, and 'why should I quit' quitters, I want to remind you that the reason for your quit should, above all else, be for you. It should be because you deserve to live a live free of substances that keep you isolated from the world. It should be because you deserve to live a life of good health. It should be because you are a beautiful soul who deserves to live a life secure in the knowledge that you belong here on earth....there is a purpose to your being here...you are important and worthy and you matter.
So if you have no one to remind you of all these things, it's up to you to cover yourself with love and to give yourself a chance. It's up to you to surprise yourself with a life well lived and to bathe yourself in forgiveness for not loving yourself for all those years. It's up to you to honor yourself by pursuing your passions and to surprise yourself with dreams realized.
Concentrate on nurturing all the good in you and walk away from things like smoking that no longer serve the person you are. And the person you are is so very, very worthy of the good life has to offer. You are deserving of being loved...by you. Start taking an active interest in all the brilliance you have inside and allow it to come out!
The young lady I was working with is surrounding herself with positive things that mean something to her. She has a gratitude journal she writes in every morning because it starts her day off well. She volunteers at a local animal shelter because she knows what its like to be abandoned and abused like the animals have been. And she is working hard at her GED classes. Through therapy, she is working through hard stuff so she has her hard times. I think she is amazing. She isn't so sure.
When you don't have a cheering section, when you don't have a loving family, when you don't have positive outside influences, find what you need in you. Your quiet strength, your courage, your inner grace, your self-love will be enough to see you through your quit and build a life worthy of you