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All People > Dancingthrulife_6.4.13 > Dancingthrulife_6.4.13 Blog > 2017 > February

I often wonder why we don't give ourselves time to heal during our quit journey.  When we are sick, we give ourselves time to heal.  When we break a bone or sprain something, we give ourselves time to heal.  And when we lose a loved one, we grieve and give ourselves time to heal.

But when it comes to quitting, we get impatient.  When are the craves going to leave?  Why do I feel so anxious?  Why don't I feel better?  When does it get better?  How do I stop these feelings?  When, what, why, how?

Stop for a moment and really think.

Picture all the cells in your body working frantically to heal the damage you did when you were smoking.  Getting rid of all those deadly chemicals, restoring the oxygen in your blood, strengthening your bones and skin and teeth and muscles. 

Then picture your brain.  All the sudden deprived of the very substance that kept it happy and relaxed for decades.  DECADES!!  The pathways in your brain were grooved out so well that other parts didn't have to work at all.  Now?  The neurotransmitters are firing into blank space and also frantically searching for the nicotine it needs to continue to function as it had in the past.

Ok, your body is attempting to heal, your brain is attempting to picture yourself as you have been for years.  Coffee...cigarette.  After meals....cigarette.  After cleaning house....cigarette.  Driving....cigarette.  Workout....cigarette.  Work.....break and cigarette.  Walking...cigarette.  Everything in the world that you did, you did knowing you would smoke after.  Everything.  That next cigarette was there when you needed it.  Now you don't smoke and you don't know how to live a smoke free life!!  What do you do instead?  What will feel as a cigarette?  Truthfully, nothing can replace it exactly.   After all, you were addicted.  But you can learn how to function as a non-smoker.  You can learn what true calmness is.  How to relax in a healthy way.  How to enjoy things without killing yourself while doing it. 

But it all takes time.  It takes deliberate concentration.  It takes focus.  And it takes a willingness to be extremely uncomfortable at times.  You may be, you may not be.  You get to decide.  But you can't rush recovery.  There is no finish line, no final action, no stopping point.  Recovery is a journey.  But is a journey filled with light, health, pride, and joy.  Give yourself time to get through the icky to reach the good.  Because it's there, waiting for you.  Time helps you heal and time will help give you a smoke free life. 

I love to see people quit smoking   And I try to help.  Mostly by letting you know it's doable, it's joyful, and it doesn't have to be a horrible journey.

But advice?  I have a hard time giving practical advice to quitters.  So rather than just brushing that off, I decided to figure out why I can't give 'quit smoking' advice.

And the truth is........

It's so obvious.  To quit smoking, you pull up your big girl panties and just do it.  No magic formulas, no putting it off on someone else, no miracle cures.  You have to put them down and then never pick them up again.

Sounds harsh, huh?  That's where I usually come in.  Because pulling up those panties and doing it isn't harsh at all.  It's the outward motions (or non-motions) of a quit.

Then there is the inward journey....and that is where you find your courage, your strength, your joys, and your wonder.  Life without smoking is simply......breathtakingly stunning.  The sights, the smells, the freedom.  All the negatives of the outward journey fade as the beautiful inward journey spreads into all aspects of your world.

So you may have to go through the difficult motions of quitting.  The possible headaches and physical signs of withdrawal.  The loss of a habit you've had for 20-30-50 years.  The changing your lifestyle by not having your morning coffee or suddenly buying a lot of lollipops.  The cravings you need to ride out.  All the these outward behaviors and changes may be full of struggles but they fade.  I promise they fade.

And then the inward journey blossoms.  And it's full of everything good and sweet and surprising and delightful.  You find yourself.  You look at the world differently because you look at yourself differently.  With pride and confidence and satisfaction because you've done the impossible.  The fears and doubts and anxiety trickle away with the craves.  The negatives become only faint memories. 

In all honesty, I can't tell you anything you don't already know.  To quit smoking, you have to put them down.  Your thoughts, your behaviors, and your attitudes will determine your quit.  It's all up to you.

I can tell you that you can, indeed, quit.  And that it only gets better.  And that you will never, ever regret doing it.  I promise.

I read somewhere "You are unrepeatable".

Isn't that something?  One of a kind....unique......unrepeatable.

In other words, you bring to the world something that no one else can.  Something that is only in you and not found anywhere else on earth.

Why am I writing about this here?

Because if you are smoking, you are led by your addiction which means you are unable to give the world your all.  Addiction, you see, robs us of the ability to truly live.  Addiction dictates our movements, robs us of time, and steals our health, whether we feel those effects or not.

When we quit, we not only gain better health, more time, and a stronger bank account.  We gain the freedom to do or be or say or try anything in the  world we want to do or be or say or try!  Our true selves emerge from behind the smoke and we allow ourselves to blossom into who we were always meant to be.

You are unrepeatable. You are needed. 

I hope this gives you.....hope  




No one knows you're here, right?  You are reading, looking, wondering.....can I be here, too?  Can I become an ex? 

Since you are silent, no one can reach you.  Maybe this is your way of protecting yourself just in case you chose not to quit.  Maybe you think you will fail so you want no one to know.

Maybe your sense of doom is so great that you simply come here to hope that one day, you'll get it.  You will perhaps one day just be able to set them down and walk away......

The secret of quitting is you just have to do it.  Don't wait.  Don't hope for a 'better' day.  Don't wait until you get the doctor's report.

Just do it.  Now.  And know that failure is an option, not a requirement.  You are in control of your quit.  You are in control of the outcome.  You don't have to fail.  You don't have to have a miserable "quit attempt". 

Just do it.  Walk away.  And be absolutely firm in your commitment to your quit.  There will be no turning back, no slips, no failure.  Smoking isn't who you are, its just something you used to do.  Don't make it hard, don't make it impossible.  Reach out here....don't be silent.  Ask questions, voice concerns, seek knowledge.

But most of all, know in your head and in your heart that you are in control of your quit.  You are stronger than you know, braver than you think.  You can do this.....whether you want to or not.  You can do this.

And I know because I was you 1340 days ago.  We were all you at one time or another.  And we learned that we just have to do it.  So we are here to help you do it, too.

You can. Just do it.


Slow It Down

Posted by Dancingthrulife_6.4.13 Feb 2, 2017

Don't rush your quit.  Sometimes a quitter wants to feel better immediately and wants the cravings to end within days.  Quitting is a journey that doesn't ever really end, although the negatives slowly drift away and the positives become your focus.

Life is short anyway, so why rush through it?  Take the time to get to know yourself...your non-smoking self.  Develop your talents, clean out that junk drawer, spend the day with your darling grandchild.  Don't rush just because you don't want to feel the discomfort of your quit.  Remember, once you quit smoking you are not allowing your addiction to have control of you anymore.  So don't run from your recovery!

Yes, you are going to have some uncomfortable moments.  They may jump out at you at the most surprising times and take you off guard.  Remember that you are in charge!!  You are in control!!  Acknowledge that thought and then move on.  You do not have to dwell in a craving.  You do not have to live in the misery of withdrawal.  They will ease in time.  So please give yourself that time.

I have learned to live in the moment rather than looking ahead or behind.  I have learned to slow down and enjoy each day rather than looking forward to a day in the murky future that may be better.  I have learned that life comes with discomfort, pain, joy, and every emotion in between and I will get through them all. 

May your quit be your beginning.  May it be your joy.  May you feel pride and strength and wonder.  And may you take the time to feel them all.

Happy  Thursday, quitters!!



Posted by Dancingthrulife_6.4.13 Feb 1, 2017

We sometimes think of quitting as an end to something.  Giving up something we've done, letting go of a firmly implanted habit, or simply closing the door to smoking.  In other words, we are quitting.

Could you maybe think of it in another way?  Rather than quitting, you are starting something new.  A healing.  A beginning.  A lifetime of better health.  More money.  More time.  You are beginning to take back what smoking has taken from you.


For those still in the thinking stage.....think of all the gains!  Think of your body thanking you!  Think of your family being proud (not to mention healthier!).  Think of the pride you'll have in yourself.  Think of the excitement of not being controlled by a substance.  A deadly substance.  Think of the wonder you'll feel as you are no longer tied to an addiction that dictated what you did, when you did it, and how it isolated you from the rest of the world. 


For you who are newly are beginning a remarkably powerful journey of beginnings.  One of hope, one of joy.

One of the best things that you will ever accomplish.  You will discover yourself.  You will emerge stronger, wiser, and so much more in love with life.  You will struggle at times but you struggled while smoking as well.  Life moments happen, both good and not so good.  We adjust, we get through, and we go on.


Welcome, dear quitters, to the best decision you've ever made!!  You are beginning the most exciting journey of your life.  Enjoy it and don't look back.  You've got this.


(I don't know how many days I have any more.  But I will be at four years 6/4/17)