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All People > Dancingthrulife_6.4.13 > Dancingthrulife_6.4.13 Blog > 2016 > November

~~Gratitude turns what we have into enough, and more.  It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.~~  Melody Beattie

Its somewhat easy to be thankful when our lives are going well.  There is a calm serenity in everything flowing peacefully into the next day.  But when we struggle with life, that calm serenity fades into the background while a dark cloud forms over our heads and turns our world gray.

Its during these times, however, when gratitude can carry us back into the light.  Because while we may not be able to "fix" our lives, we can bring peace back into focus by remembering all we have to be thankful for.  Our families, friends, nature....the ability to walk, to think, to see.... our hearts, our spirits, our souls....the gift of life.

There is always, always something to be thankful for.  It may be individual and unique just unto you but that makes it even more precious.  Look at your life and look at you.  Because you are the reason someone else is thankful, as well.

Sootie, Tommy, Dale, Marilyn, Wendy, Terrie, Thomas, Giulia, Nancy, Nikki, Diane Joy....I am forever thankful for your wisdom, your friendship, your support!!  Rickie, BeeJay, have changed my life forever in the sweetest, best kind of way!!  The Ex site....I am almost 3 1/2 years smoke free and I learned so much about addiction and recovery right here....forever grateful!!

I am missing people, I know.  Bonnie (both of you!), Terry (WIsconsin), our fabulous Shawn, our darling Jackie, Pops, Virginia, warrior queen all amaze me and delight me with your courage, humor, and strength. 

Quitting smoking is not a punishment....not a chore....not an agony.  Quitting is a gift to yourself that will carry you through the rest of your life.  Be grateful that you are giving yourself that gift.  It is a joy.....a adventure. 

I am thankful today for my many, many blessings.  And I sincerely hope that each of you...especially those who struggle with their quits.....find a reason to be grateful for quitting and thankful for the gift of life.

~~Be filled with wonder, be touched by peace.~~  Unknown

From the moment you decide to quit smoking, let the wonder of life keep you focused on all that's good.  All that's miraculous.  All that's possible.

And that includes seeing yourself as you truly are.  Brave.  Resilient.  Remarkable.

Because you are, truly, a miracle.  You may not think so right now but really think about it.  No one sees things quite the way you do.  No one understands the world in the way you do.  No one brings quite the joy...the delight...the happiness that you bring to life. 

Be filled with the wonder of life.  The colors....the breath....the pulse of life.  Each spark of laughter.  Each warm glow of comfort.  Each gentle moment.

Don't fight your quit.  Don't fight yourself.  Quitting is a choice and you know you've chosen well.  So flow with the wonder of quitting.  The beautiful aromas....the breathtaking joys....the pretty little moments of sheer happiness.

Remember that your choice will bring to you nothing....absolutely nothing.....but good.  Positive.  Wonderful.  Delightful.  There is no bad in quitting, other than what you convince yourself of.  So stop trying to convince yourself that you've made a bad choice.  Find peace in your quit.  You know that it's there, just on the other side of addiction.  Peace of mind.  Peace of spirit.  Peace that will envelop you in a warmth so relaxing that you will wonder why you didn't quit sooner.

Life will bring you pain again and stress and loss and anger and all those negative things you used to smoke your way through.  But now, after your quit, all those negative things CAN be a source of wonder as you go get through them with strength, with courage, with wisdom instead of with a cigarette.  You will keep peace in your heart as the storms rage around you because you know these things will pass.  Without you hurting yourself with a cigarette. 

So find the wonder.  Be touched by peace.  And honor your choice because you've chosen well.

~~So, what if, instead of thinking about solving your whole life, you just think about adding additional good things.  One at a time.  Just let your pile of good things grow.~~  Rainbow Rowell

Think about it.  Just adding good thing at a time.  Maybe a stroll after dinner each night.  Maybe a phone call to your mother.  Maybe an extra cup of tea.  Maybe playing your favorite song every day.  Maybe taking five minutes each day, draw, rest, clean, paint, play music, discover, explore.

Don't worry about tomorrow.  It's not here yet.  Stop thinking about yesterday.  You can't change it.  Just today, add something good.  And truly enjoy it.  And during the day, remember it.  Smile.  Know it's there, waiting for you. 

Now some of us do better at worrying, at missing things we've given up, at finding all the reasons our lives aren't as we want it.  I say, ok.  But add that one good thing.  And your whole life may be messed up...except that one good thing.  And you may miss smoking, but pay attention to your one good thing. 

And know that no one can take your one good thing away.  It can't be tainted by others, by negativity, by the world.  It's yours.  A gift to yourself.  Something that makes your heart sigh in gladness.  Something that makes your soul sing.

Before you know it, your pile of good things is much, much better than your pile of negatives.  And your pile of good things will mean much much more to you than your regrets, your worries, your fears.  And your pile of good things are going to be a reflection of you...your goodness, your goofiness, your talents, your joys. 

I can't take away your fears as you quit smoking.  I can't make it better for you.  I can't ease your cravings.  But I can, hopefully, give you ways that you can take away your own fears and make it better for yourself and ease your cravings as you learn how to make your world bright, beautiful, and a reflection of all that is good in you.  Because you deserve that.

Happy Tuesday, my friends.  I hope you found enjoyment in your day.


If you are going to believe in anything, believe in yourself.~~  Unknown

You don't have to be "positive".  You don't have to be "happy".  You don't have to turn your life around and become Saint.......whomever.

You can be grouchy.  You can hate the world.  You can be depressed, anxious, stressed, or all the above.

You don't have to count days.  You may want to count minutes instead.  You don't have to post your story.  You may post three thousand times a day.

The only thing you have to do is to believe in yourself.  Believe that no matter how bad things get, you can get through them without smoking.  Believe that no matter who tries to down you, no matter how awful you feel, no matter what life sticks you with, you will not smoke.

That's all.  You will not smoke.  You can cry, rant, hate, spew, post, scream, curl up in a ball or run a marathon.  You just can't smoke.  And you can't smoke because?

Because out of everything you can believe in, you've chosen to believe in yourself.  That you can.  That you will.  That you have.

You just have to believe.


It's Time

Posted by Dancingthrulife_6.4.13 Nov 7, 2016

~~Transformation isn't sweet and bright.  It's a dark and murky, painful pushing.  An unraveling of the untruths you've carried in your body.  A practice in facing your own created demons.  A complete uprooting before becoming.~~  Victoria Erickson

Quitting means transforming.  Unraveling all those many untruths we've carried around for so very long...."I can't quit"....."It relaxes me"....."I feel like I've lost my best friend".  We've carried these untruths in our bodies comfortable in our lies until they've damaged us in mind and spirit as well as body.

We've created these demons.  Smoked knowing the risks.  Hearing the word "addiction" but becoming so addicted that we can't distinguish between what we know and who we are.

So it's time for transformation.  It's time to delve into the darky and murky painful pushing to uproot these self-made demons so we can become.  Become more.  Stronger, healthier, brighter.  Become who we always were underneath the lies and the smoke and the addiction. 

As we unravel and uproot, the hope of becoming is a light that allows us to focus on more...if we choose to see it.  And as the light glows brighter, our hopes, our dreams, our true selves emerge into the world like a miracle.  Miraculous because we never thought we could break free.  Miraculous because we finally...finally....see the truths through the untruths, the self created demons fading into memories of challenges won.

It's time to transform.  And focus on the hope of becoming rather than believing the demons you've created by smoking.  Allow them to fade as you reach towards life.  Allow them to rest while you choose to rise stronger, braver, and brilliant.  Because it's in you.  Brilliance.  Wisdom.  Truth.  Just waiting in the shadows for you to call on them.  It's time.

~~She always had a sense of inner strength...and now it showed.~~  Unknown


I know you're thinking about quitting.  You've been here awhile, reading and thinking and trying finding the magic formula.  You know you should for your health.  You know it's the right thing to do.  But yet.....

You've been a smoker as long as you've been an adult.  You've smoked through your darker moments in life because it helped keep you sane.  You've smoked through the stresses of life.  You've smoked in celebration.  You've smoked because....well, that's what you've always done.

So now you are thinking that if you quit, you're losing part of who you are.  Good, bad, right, wrong.  It's a part of you.  What will you do instead that can give you that same sense of comfort? That same feeling of "Now I can relax."

Take a moment...just a moment...and really feel these words:  Everything you are thinking is simply a lie.  You think smoking comforts you...but it's just that your brain is getting the nicotine it needs to function.  That's not comfort, that's addiction.  Smoking is part of who you are?  In truth, your addiction is part of who you are and that's not something you need to fight to keep.  You've smoked through the stress in your life?  You've actually smoked through everything in your life, haven't you?  It didn't change anything that has happened to you, that you have gone through, that has hurt you.  Smoking doesn't change anything.  It's simply an addiction.

Yes, you are a smoker.  But just as importantly, yes, you can live without them. 

So while you're addiction is telling you all the reasons why quitting isn't for you, also listen to the real you that is telling you that you CAN live a smoke free life.  The world is waiting for you to come out behind that cloud of smoke and celebrate freedom.  The freedom to live without 'having' to have a quick smoke.  The freedom to stay at the dinner table and talk with your family instead of having that after dinner cigarette.  The freedom to wake in the morning and enjoy being alive instead of having that first one of the day. 

Life is glorious when you are smoke free!!  Ask anyone here and they will be more than happy to tell you that.  Ask anyone here and they will be happy to tell you their quit journey.  Ask anyone here and no one will ever say that they have regretted quitting. 

So welcome to the beginning of freedom!!  Welcome to the realization that yes, you can!!  Welcome to becoming a warrior!!  And ask any of us....the journey is glorious!!

~~Do you know what makes you a hero?  The fact that you give the world another chance every d*mn day.  That's what makes you a hero.~~  S.C. Lourie

When I first saw this, it certainly caught my attention.  Heck, yeah!!  We do, don't we?  We get up almost every day...some of us even more than that....and face the world again.  And no matter how much it batters us, bruises us, beats us down, we get up again.

So yes.  Each one of us is a hero.  Because we face another day.  Because we smile one more smile.  Because we cry for a bit but then face another test.  Another trial.  Another battle.

And we get through it all.  Whether we want to or not.  Whether we walk through it or crawl through it or push our way to the other side, life has not gotten the best of us yet.

I love that challange!!  I give the world another chance every d*mn day and I am delighted to anticipate what might happen next!!  Because I know I'll get through it.  I love a good challenge and I see joy in every day even when the day is not good.  (Look for the moments of sheer joy.  Pay attention.  And treasure them.)

When we quit smoking, life gets even more interesting.  More adventurous.  More uncomfortable and yet better.  Accept what the world throws at you as an Ex smoker.  Because you'll find that the world is throwing the same are just better equipped to handle it as an Ex.  More confident.  More calm.  More courage, strength, wisdom, and humor.  The very best of you comes out when you put the addiction behind you.

Be your own hero.  Quit smoking.  Face life.  And give the world another d*mn chance.