Well, I’m glad to say that I’m still smoke free. To be honest, I was a little nervous about the last few days. You see, for the first time since I quit we went camping. I already knew there would be many strong triggers there that I hadn’t yet dealt with. I knew that for the first time in a while my internal addict would let itself be known.
Thing is, I was ready for this. I’d already prepared to experience those wonderful urges once again! And this paid off. I did indeed have those urges. Still, it was a wonderful experience in the end for you see I once again reinforced my quit simply by believing that I no longer smoke.
This in itself is enough to give us the strength we need when we need it. And when we successfully make it through a time that we’re not sure of, then we again build that confidence in ourselves and our abilities to beat our addictions once and for all.
Every time we have one of those rough days with our addictions and survive that day is in reality another step toward our freedom. It’s another step toward our new life and it’s another step toward a belief in ourselves that we will never let anything derail our quits.
So I guess this is just a reminder to those who are out of no man’s land that there’s just a little more to deal with. It’s a reminder that we have to be vigilant in our quits. We have to treat our quits with the respect they deserve and we must respect all that we’ve done in order to continue onward to freedom.
Don’t get me wrong, It wasn’t a horrible experience at all. This is because with every day that we live our new lives we learn how to deal with those urges and triggers. It becomes sort of a habit to keep ourselves safe from ourselves. We learn how to understand our addictions and this in turn allows us to live our lives with an understanding of ourselves and what motivates us to lean toward that addiction.
And to me, understanding is indeed a large part of the total battle. This is the knowledge that becomes the power we so desperately need. This is the knowledge we need to remain true to ourselves. It’s a key weapon that must be placed within our arsenal in order to stay free. This is a small price to pay for the benefits that are realized for the more we can add to ourselves to ward off the addiction, the easier it becomes.
Another interesting thing happened during this trip. I haven’t yet climbed the physical Mt. Freedom. That will come next year but I did get a chance to try out these new lungs of mine. I began hiking up an extremely steep mountain. As I climbed I became rather disappointed with the results. My lungs were burning even though my heart had kept a steady pace.
I was indeed happy that the old heart was doing well under this strain but wondered about the lungs. That is, until I turned around. I had just climbed about two thousand feet in a matter of fifteen minutes! Now that amazed me. I’ve never been able to do anything like that since I was a kid!
No wonder the old lungs were burning. I sat down and smiled to myself because of the realization that yes, my quit was really benefiting me in incredible ways! My heart was not strained in the least even though I must have practically ran up this little mountain.
What amazed me was that I really didn’t realize how far I’d traveled because my lungs never informed me with what used to be incredible wheezing and coughing as I exerted myself before. So never believe for an instant that what your trying to achieve is not for the good of your heart, lungs and overall health. Never believe that this journey isn’t worth it.
The bottom line is that if you can get through the first hard days and keep your heart and soul focused on the benefits awaiting you in the future then you will indeed win. If you can always remember that what you do right now determines your future then you will win. And man, when you get to the future that your creating today then you too can smile at yourself. You too can be proud of your achievement. You too can climb that mountain and wonder why in the heck you waited so long to do this!
Never give up on yourself and keep your eye on the prize!!
