Day 81 - More random thoughts

Blog Post created by Chuck_Quit_2-20-2011 on May 13, 2011

Well, another week is almost over. Another week for me as a nonsmoker. I find it all to be interesting to say the least. Has it been easy? Not really, but it’s been a lot easier then I ever thought it would be. It’s been a journey that has both feelings of accomplishment and feelings of loss, even though many of the feelings are irrational to say the least.


It’s been a journey that forces one to look deep inside of oneself and find the little gems that live within all of us. Those gems that we use to propel us onward into our future free of nicotine. These are gems of life really because they are being used to do just that. Save a life.


It starts with a simple commitment to oneself. This is the first gem of life and it takes on a life of it’s own as we progress on our journey, creating new gems to help us fight our internal addict as he whispers words of death to us, the addict never realizing that death is indeed what he is whispering for you see, to the internal addict there is no wrong or right. There is no thought about a future or about a slow agonizing death.


I believe that this is because the addict lives only in the present. There is no thought of past mistakes or the future. All that matters to the internal addict is the now. Satisfying the needs of the now and never thinking about what our present situation might do to our future situation.


It’s just the way of addiction I think. It’s up to us to push that addict aside and teach our addictions that yes, there is a future and yes, we will think of that future. We will build that future starting with today and then the next day and the next.


Still, our addictions fight us with thoughts that over time become almost alien to us because of the new perception we have of ourselves. The more we realize that we care for our futures, the more the addicts whispers become harder to hear. But beware. There will always be those times when his whispers will once again form within our minds. This is when we really prove our commitment for we must once again fight that urge that has become a little more alien to us. We must look to our past and remember what gems we used to fight this addiction and bring them to bear on the situation so as not to slip.


So yes, though the battle is long and has many treacherous twists and turns along the way, it’s still a battle that can be won. It’s still a battle worth fighting and it’s still one of the most positive things we can do for our futures. When we think of quitting as hard it’s because we are only looking at the moment and forgetting the beauty that is our futures. We forget why we started the fight and we loose our momentum over time.


To me, a quit is like a flower that must be nurtured each and every day of it’s existence. And like a flower it offers rewards that aren’t always tangible though can be seen and felt. This in itself is reason enough to continue nurturing our quits. It’s reason enough to fight the internal addict and it’s reason enough to never ever give in to thoughts that only relate to the now.


So, whenever those pesky little whispers enter my mind, I will leave them as just a thought in the background as I look to my future free of my addiction. I will never give up on my future and will always remember the benefits of my quit rather then dwell on the discomfort of the present. I will use the memories of the past to always remind me of why I quit and I will never ever give in to the whispers that speak only of the present.


I love life and intend to live it in freedom!!