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2017
Christine13

A Christmas Miracle!

Posted by Christine13 Dec 27, 2017

Wanted to let you know that Brian is now my Miracle Man.  On Dec. 19 he got two blood transfusions and they gave him expired blood!!  He was doing poorly and as they ran the second unit of blood we told them he should be feeling better not worse.  He was also septic and had rash of over his body.  His breathing was difficult too, they sent him home that evening.  He had a good sleep, but the next morning his rash had worsened he had fever, and his breathing was horrible.  I knew he was having an allergic reaction to the blood and called an ambulance to take him into hospital.

They tried to take him back to the same hospital and he was declined, they said they didn't have the expertise to fix him.  We were then rerouted to St. Boniface General hospital which is a state of the art hospital with all the best Dr.'s

He was a code amber (life threatening)  they rushed him in there and the doctor saw him immediately.  After looking at him he said he had a bad blood infection and his blood was septic.  I was told this never should have happened to him and that an investigation would be done!

Within 3 hours he'd been seen by 3 doctors and then another 6.

He was admitted and transferred to a private room.  They thought he had shingles, the rash.

He doesn't have shingles the blood test showed herpes and human papilloma virus.  Antivirals were run as well as tons of toxic antibiotics.  To make a long story short, after confusion and hallucinations and hearing things he recovered the next day. He hadn't slept since Tuesday and that was Friday night.  By Saturday he was ok and turning a corner on things.  Sunday, (Christmas Day) they wanted to discharge him, but blood was low again so I said he wasn't going anywhere without two units of blood.  I cautioned them to cross and match, make sure it was A negative blood and to check the expiry date.  They did and they were very cautious.  Yesterday in the morning we got him home and now we are able to enjoy the holidays.  Thank god our children were here from California, and that my daughter Tara works in the same hospital he was admitted to!!!  She would check in on him before and after her shifts on a different ward,

My Man almost died, we thought he would die Christmas Day, but God smiled on him, and now we are ok!!  He will live to celebrate his 70th Birthday Jan. 25th and he will have another Spring too!!!!!

My Forever man is now named my Miracle man.  By the way it was my first smoke free Christmas in 45 years.

Smoking was the LAST thing on my mind!!!

For all the love and prayers from my Ex family I am grateful

Love you all!

Miracles Do Happen, God is good.  Life is Good, EAT it up!!!

xoxoxo

Christine13

Sometimes

Posted by Christine13 Dec 17, 2017

Sometimes I get scared, what if I will never get my forever quit?  I relapsed on Friday.  Was in no man's land, and feeling very depressed that day.  I just couldn't get it off my mind (smoking) I walked for some and got a pack.

My worst nightmare.  I blew a perfectly good quit, when I should have blogged and asked for help.

I have reset my quit day and today I am quit.  It wasn't worth the one, or the package that followed.

I have shaken off the depression and the ugly cry I had after that cleansed my soul not the cigs.

I have to hold it together, I have to. 

I have been craving bad today, for about 3 days actually.  Thursday, Friday were very stressful days, and I thought I'd come through that ok finally on Friday night.  No, I didn't smoke.  I didn't drink either.  For some reason today has been especially bad for me. I can't go to my usual things like gum, or chips or crunchy foods because of my gum biopsies last Monday.  My junkie thinking is telling me to go and get some and smoke this feeling away.  After all I deserve a smoke cause I've been so good.  You know...........a reward!!  But wait a minute, I don't need that kind of reward, one that could eventually kill me-do I?  My junkie says I'm going to die anyway.  Wait..........STOP..........Last Monday when I was about to have those biopsies I told the Dr. I'd stopped smoking.  It felt so good to tell him that.  I smell so good, I don't have to keep running outside to feed my addiction.  Most days don't feel like this.  I really don't want to go through all of this heartache again.  ah.........yes, I remember Marilyn's words the only way out is through.  I thought I'd managed to convince myself that this wasn't so bad, tough but not that bad.  It's dang tough............Somehow I will find the strength to make it through this night.  I sure don't want to start from day one again, and I know after the first pack or two I'd want to quit again.  It just seems to be getting to me tonight.  All this mental bargaining is wearing me out...........so I DECIDE to take the high road.........no smoking for me tonight after all. Thanks for letting me share.

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