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All People > Christine13 > Christine13 Blog > 2017 > June
2017

Ok, I am starting my journey once again.  This time I am moving forward and I finally have time to devote to being on Ex.  I am so relieved to be finally doing this.  I have reset my quit date, and I know my Ex family has always been so supportive.  This is a real life changer, and I'm willing to go through my emotional roller coaster.  I am committing to myself and my EX family.  Thanks to my good friend Marilyn, and Ellen and their blogs and friendship, I will remain vigilant and tied to this site.

I think I am a surface learner, all these years, and all the denial I've had about smoking and how serious a thing it really is.  This is serious stuff, I've got to learn to cope without going for my major comfort, smoking.  It has been 47 years of smoking for me............long time eh? stupid (to myself)  There is no one in my family that smokes anymore and I had 24 of them here for a family gathering for my daughter's Birthday.  I am really grateful to finally have some down time to be here and read, read, read!!  I've been doing that all day today, and everyday, that I had a chance.  I'm sick and tired of making EXcuses for myself.............and I'm learning new ways to cope without smoking.  I am quit!!  That is important, but not only to say I'm quit, but to work the program for myself.  I've always tried to quit for everyone else.  This ones for me, because I am finally ready to say, I deserve freedom too!!

Christine13

Life is Good!!

Posted by Christine13 Jun 17, 2017

So happy I can now blog from my computer.  Life is good, especially without the cigs!!  Just enjoyed a totally wonderful day with my youngest daughter, son-in-law and grandson yesterday!  (They are in from California)  We live in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada, and they are a long, long way from home.  We only get to see them about once a year now, so it feels like Christmas to me!!  We had a wonderful day yesterday, many hugs, laughter and good food.  The nicest part of it all, was I didn't have to miss anything by going out to smoke on a coffin nail.  I smelled great, looked great, and I didn't miss out!!  Yes, life is good, even without the cigs!!  We have been through many hard, tough times, this last winter with my husband's Brian's health.  He has 15 years quit this August 25th, but sad to say he didn't quit soon enough - he has severe COPD.  I have beginning COPD, i think.  I am early on in my quit, and having a big pizza party for my daughter's 39th Birthday on Monday.  We have 24-29 family members coming here and we have a tiny house.

i'm praying for a sunny day so half of them can be out on the deck.  I am a bit nervous about getting everything done and keeping quit............but smoking wouldn't help me one bit through this.  The only way out is through, and I don't do that anymore!!  Life is good.........we don't need cigs to get us through, we need love and care and nurturing, which I have found all of here!!  This is life and it's real...........so don't smoke your emotions away, enjoy the ride!!

This is me, Chrissie, I am real, and a nicotine addict, but the help here is wonderful, so connect here with all the wonderful support at EX!!

Christine13

Just A Test

Posted by Christine13 Jun 16, 2017

Just trying to write a blog, checking computer.

Christine13

Panicky

Posted by Christine13 Jun 7, 2017

Hiiii everyone.  Lots going on here.  Hopefully a transfusion for Brian on Monday.  Planning a big pizza party for my daughter June 19th.  Anyway I haven't had a panic attack in a long time but took the car out for errands and groceries and I felt this huge wave of panic.  I don't like it at all.  Scares me so bad.  Is this something other people feel too when they are quit or is it just me?  Lots of anxiety here today. Will try to calm down somehow.   I know better than to smoke but just feeling overwhelmed  again.    hope it goes away soon.

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